A better writer on a more serious music website would likely write a couple brilliant sentences about Sam Beam’s beard (We get it. It’s big!). A better writer would give a thorough synopsis into the history of Iron & Wine. A better writer would go on and on about the recently released The Shepherd’s Dog and the recent European tour.

A better writer would give you facts, and not a buttload of misleading information. A better writer would be objective and unbiased. A better writer would show a sense of maturity and pride in his work. A better writer would bend over backwards for everyone in the music industry.

Emceegreg is not that writer. Emceegreg sees headlines like "Iron & Wine Extend Tour" and automatically thinks of erected phalluses. Emceegreg thinks about a greased-up, scantily clad Sam Beam caressing the folks in Tucson, AZ. Emceegreg often has dreams about Beam naked as he came, if you know what I mean. Emceegreg knows for a fact that Beam is not quiet in bed. Emceegreg has no shame.

Emceegreg is also unaware that his homoerotic stories are at times immature and offensive, but he thinks it’s okay because he has one black friend.

Current tourdates:

10.26.07 - Belfast, UK - Spiegel Tent (Belfast Fest) 10.27.07 - Dublin, IRE - Ambassador Theatre 10.28.07 - Bristol, UK - St. George’s Hall 10.29.07 - Edinburgh, UK - Queens Hall 10.31.07 - London, UK - Shepherds Bush Empire 11.01.07 - Cardiff, UK - The Point 11.02.07 - Brighton, UK - St. Georges Church 11.03.07 - Nottingham, UK - Rescue Rooms 11.04.07 - Reading, UK - Concert Hall

Extended tour; I’ve seen bigger:

11.26.07 - Tucson, AZ - Fox Tucson Theatre 11.27.07 - San Diego, CA - 4th & B 11.28.07 - Los Angeles, CA - Orpheum Theatre 11.30.07 - Oakland, CA - Paramount Theatre 12.02.07 - Portland, OR - Crystal Ballroom 12.03.07 - Seattle, WA - Moore Theatre 12.04.07 - Bellingham, WA - Mt. Baker Theatre 12.06.07 - Boise, ID - Egyptian Theater 12.07.07 - Magna, UT - The Great Saltair 12.08.07 - Denver, CO - Paramount Theatre 12.09.07 - Albuquerque, NM - El Rey Theater 12.10.07 - Dallas, TX - Palladium Ballroom 12.11.07 - Austin, TX - La Zona Rosa