Quickly! Ariel Pink and Cass McCombs have scheduled a tour starting next month, and they need YOU! Coincidentally, the tambourine players for both Ariel Pink and Cass McCombs' touring bands died in some sort of accident... I think it was related to a car... Anyway, who gives a shit; the important thing right now is that you get a tambourine pronto so you can shake shake shake with Ariel Pink and Cass McCombs. Can't afford it? Of course you can't! Thankfully you've come to TMT, the cheapest, stingiest motherfucking online zine known to man.
Here's what you need to do:
1. Staple or glue two paper plates together, facing each other.
2. Using a hole punch, make holes around the plates and tie jingle bells to the holes with string.
3. Decorate the tambourine with crayons.
4. Shake to play.
Note: Heavy duty paper plates may be more durable for this craft.
Safety note: If using a stapler, an adult should do this. Someone named Natalie works best. When finished be sure to cover the staples with scotch tape.
Tip: Practice playing along with Ariel Pink's full discography, as well as McCombs' new album Dropping the Writ, slated for a October 9 on Domino Records.
And there you go, jackass!