Bruise Cruise announces 2012 lineup, including Thee Oh Sees, The Dirtbombs, and Quintron & Miss Pussycat — in the Bahamas!

Bruise Cruise announces 2012 lineup, including Thee Oh Sees, The Dirtbombs, and Quintron & Miss Pussycat — in the Bahamas! http://www.tinymixtapes.com/sites/default/files/news-11-05-bruise-cruise.jpg

This past February saw the maiden voyage of the Bruise Cruise, the weekend-long festival on a boat that sails from Miami to the Bahamas and back. There’s typical cruise fare: the food, the pools, the drinks. But then there’s that extra something you just can’t get on a Royal Caribbean cruise with your parents: good, old-fashioned rock ‘n’ roll. There was none of that hokey disco shit that gets repeated week after week throughout the cruise season, no Beatlemania bands or Elvis impersonators. Last year, the boat was packed with solid acts like Thee Oh Sees, The Black Lips, Vivian Girls, and Ty Segall (who, yes, did facilitate a marriage proposal onboard). Apparently, the festival was a blast and the voyage was deemed successful enough to announce a second cruise in 2012, sailing February 10-13!

Indeed, cheesy family-friendly (lame) fun is gone from this boat; Neil Hamburger’s got the comedy sector under control for the Bruise Cruise’s second go, and Miss Pussycat promises a “puppetry breakfast hour” the likes of which kids have never seen on Sesame Street. Thee Oh Sees and Quintron are on the bill again, along with King Khan & The Shrines, The Soft Pack, The Dirtbombs, and DJ Jonathan Toubin. Like I said, it’s still a cruise ship, so there’s a casino, open-bar hours, lectures, and the kind of expensive pampering (/drinking) that you see in commercials — as if partying with King Khan weren’t enough. Only 500 guests are admitted, so if you like the Bahamas and “rock the boat” puns, buy a ticket here.

• Bruise Cruise Festival: http://www.bruisecruisefestival.com

Swans get their hands on some US dates, kiss their American skin, ask where the hell they’ve been

Sound the apocalypse bell! Swans cometh! And when Swans cometh, mere press releases and news stories and their ilk hardly seem appropriate. What we need is some made-up mystical nonsense, something like an ‘apocalypse bell.’ Because if I ever find myself face-to-face with head Swan Michael Gira and he looks me in the eye and asks “What have you done for me,” I don’t want to find myself answering, “Well, um, sir, I wrote a news story about you once.” That hardly seems like enough. Instead, I’ll strike the made-up apocalypse bell and announce this to the world: Swans will tour the US in September!

As you have already heard, Swans are not only touring Europe this summer but are also working on a follow-up to their much lauded 2010 release, My Father Will Guide Me Up a Rope to the Sky (TMT Review). Once they return from that overseas sojourn, they will rest for roughly 40 days. When they emerge from their period of recovery, the group will head onto the roads of America for a month of dates. Joining them on this journey will be Sir Richard Bishop of Sun City Girls, who will fit in just fine, as he may or may not be a sorcerer.

Swans dates:

09.08.11 - Baltimore, MD - Sonar *
09.09.11 - Raleigh, NC - Fletcher Opera Theater (Hopscotch Festival)
09.10.11 - Asheville, NC - Orange Peel *
09.11.11 - Charlotte, NC - Tremont Music Hall *
09.14.11 - West Palm Beach, FL - Respectable Street *
09.15.11 - Tallahassee, FL - Engine Room *
09.16.11 - Atlanta, GA - Variety Playhouse *
09.17.11 - Nashville, TN - Mercy Lounge *
09.20.11 - Minneapolis, MN - First Avenue *
09.21.11 - Milwaukee, WI - Turner Hall *
09.22.11 - Chicago, IL - Bottom Lounge *
09.23.11 - Cleveland, OH - Beachland Ballroom *
09.24.11 - Lexington, KY - Buster’s Backroom *
09.27.11 - Brooklyn, NY - Music Hall of Williamsburg *
09.29.11 - Boston, MA - Royale Nightclub *
10.01.11 - Asbury Park, NJ - ATP Festival at Convention Centre

* Sir Richard Bishop

• Swans: http://swans.pair.com
• Sir Richard Bishop: http://www.sirrichardbishop.net

Andrew Bird brings whimsy/whistling to fans across America this summer/fall

Professional violinist/whistler extraordinaire Andrew Bird will spend the summer wandering through the backroads of America, bringing his unique brand of folky Americana to the good people of California and several Northern states. The tour starts with a stop at Brooklyn’s Prospect Park Bandshell, where he will play a free show to a crowd of men dressed like barbershop quartet members and women who say things like ‘the bee’s knees.’ (That’s how I envision it, at least.)

The merry songster will continue his reign of mirth in the fall, as, accompanied by the turning leaves and a lingering sense of nostalgia, the seasons change and Mr. Bird departs Rochester, NY to journey through the original colonies. He’ll be playing similarly olde tyme-sounding venues, amongst them opera houses galore, with a music hall thrown in for good measure. Bird’s most recent recording was 2010’s live album Fingerlings 4. He also appeared on The Preservation Hall Jazz Society’s 2010 benefit album Preservation: An Album to Benefit Preservation Hall & The Preservation Hall Music Outreach Program.

Dates:

06.10.11 - Brooklyn, NY - Prospect Park Bandshell (Celebrate Brooklyn)
06.18.11 - Ann Arbor, MI - Ann Arbor Summer Festival
06.24.11 - Bondville, VT - Wanderlust Vermont
08.05.11 - Regina, CA - Regina Folk Festival
08.09.11 - Arvada, CO - Arvada Center for the Arts & Humanities
08.10.11 - Boulder, CO - Chautauqua Auditorium
10.12.11 - Rochester, NY - Harro East Ballroom
10.13.11 - Troy, NY - Troy Savings Bank Music Hall
10.14.11 - Concord, NH - Chubb Theatre
10.15.11 - Skowhegan, ME - Skowhegan Opera House
10.17.11 - Poughkeepsie, NY - Bardavon 1869 Opera House
10.18.11 - Binghamton, NY - Osterhout Concert Theater
10.20.11 - Northampton, MA - Calvin Theatre
10.21.11 - Tarrytown, NY - Tarrytown Music Hall
10.22.11 - Wilmington, DE - Grand Opera House

• Andrew Bird: http://www.andrewbird.net

[Photo: gussifer]

Joker announces new single on 4AD, likely because he misses his ol’ buddy Zomby

4AD: it’s not just for wraith-like dream pop anymore! And it hasn’t been for a long time! I mean, c’mon, they’ve put out like five different Mountain Goats records. Take that, my own stated presumptions about 4AD! Still, it’s never seemed like the go-to home for dubstep guys. That’s slowly changing, what with their signing of Zomby and now, the announcement that Bristol-based Joker will be putting out a single via the label.

On May 16, 4AD will release a Joker 12-inch by the name of “The Vision.” The record’s A-side is a version of the song called “The Vision (Breathe In),” which differentiates itself from the instrumental B-side by featuring vocals from London-based singer Jessie Ware. Whether this is a one-off release or a longer relationship (as the Zomby signing seems to be) is unknown. Nobody knows it, not even Joker himself! Actually, Joker might know it.

“The Vision” tracklisting:

A. The Vision (Breathe In) (feat. Jessie Ware)
B. The Vision (Breathe In) (instrumental)

• Joker: http://www.myspace.com/thejokerproductions
• 4AD: http://www.4ad.com

Elliott Smith documentary screening at the Los Angeles New Wave International Film Festival; five unreleased songs by Smith surface

It’s almost shocking to think that it’s been eight years since Elliott Smith passed away at age 34. Thankfully, he may be gone, but he is definitely not forgotten. A new documentary entitled Searching for Elliott Smith, by director Gil Reyes, is set to screen at the Los Angeles New Wave International Film Festival this month. For more information on the screening times, please visit the film festival’s website.

The documentary features interviews with Smith’s closest friends, including Good Will Hunting director Gus Van Sant and former girlfriend Jennifer Chiba. If you don’t live in Los Angeles, you can still celebrate Smith’s life by listening to five unreleased songs of his that recently surfaced on YouTube this past March. The song titles are unconfirmed, but searching for these titles may bring back a hit:

“She Won’t Look at Me”
“Where I Get It From”
“Like a Cop”
“I’m Gonna Get Crushed”
“Shiva Opens Her Arms”

• Los Angeles International Film Festival: http://www.laifilmfest.com

Google launches Google Music Beta without those pesky label licenses while Steve Jobs chuckles by the fire in his Louis XIV hooded chair

Today’s weather forecast is cloudy with a chance of lawsuits. According to our TMT farm teams at Rolling Stone and Billboard, Google is rolling out their own cloud-based music service. Much like the Amazon cloud service that Mr P just totally made up off the top of his head as an early April Fool’s joke, Google Music is real. Terrifyingly real. Okay, almost none of that is true. But look! Paragraph two, here I come!

Google Music seems to offer a few significant upgrades to that clunky old Amazon Cloud Drive jalopy. For starters, it’s free while in Beta and comes with roughly 20,000 songs worth of storage space (in contrast to Amazon’s 1,000 songs-worth). It also seems to work a little better with all of the stupid, non-recyclable shit that a lot of us already own. A special Music Manager tool, available for both Windows and Mac, lets users add songs directly to Music Beta simply by clicking on a certain folder (like the iTunes Music folder), after which all of your songs, playlists, ratings, diary pages, and social security information are added to Music Beta. After the 800 hours it will take to upload your whole library to the ether, you can then stream all of your taste-making, list-topping music to any Google-linked device with internet access.

So what are the cons? Well, let’s see: unlike Amazon’s thing, you can’t actually purchase music with Google Music. You can only grab stuff you’ve already got. Also, it needs flash to work at the moment, so it’s a no-go for iPhones and iPads. Aaaand since its Beta, it’s invite-only right now, which I suppose is frustrating, although I’m pretty sure everyone knows someone who works for that company in some capacity. Oh yeah, and there’s also that pesky little problem of Google, much like Amazon, not actually, technically, completely, per se getting, you know, permission from the labels to go ahead with this service. But in his keynote presentation earlier today, Google’s Paul Joyce stated that he talked to some of the label’s girlfriends when he ran into them at the gym the other week and he’s “like, pretty sure” that it’s “all gravy.” God, I miss Lala.

• Introductory Video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZrNhKcxBbZo
• More on Google Music Beta: http://music.google.com
• Um… Google: http://google.com

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