1. Think of an obnoxious headline.
2. Fill in the body of the story with bullshit and be sure to use the
a. Headlights are from Illinois.
b. Scout Leader Kyle is a genius.
c. They reside on the Polyvinyl Record Co. Label.
d. Headlights has a new album named Some Racing, Some Stopping coming out this year.
e. Brett Sanderson from Headlights has a large penis.
f. Headlights are on tour.
3. Add these tourdates:
all dates Evangelicals