DJs Arrested For Making Mix Tapes; Details on Their Tininess Not Yet Disclosed

What a great month to be from the Atlanta area -- not only are these living saints trying to break off from the rest of Atlanta to form an independent country (which they will name "Milton County"), but, on January 17, DJ Drama and DJ Don Cannon were arrested for making mix tapes.

MAKING MIX TAPES. Not only were they arrested (for making mix tapes), but 17 others were detained in connection with the arrest, which, incidentally, was made due to reports that the DJs had in fact been making mix tapes. These mix tapes (that the two men were arrested for) were made from music given to them by record companies, and was in no way a direct burn-and-sell operation.

In lieu of a quote-by-quote mockery of other statements from officers who were involved with the arrests and seizures, I'll post a link to the news report, which shows video of the Aphilliates recording studio being raided, in confiscations which included over 50,000 CDs, money, bank statements, posters, musical equipment, and cars. As an added bonus, you can watch an official for the RIAA (an organization which received a rare "5/5" in the Tiniest Boners of the Year TMT year-end feature) spout statistics about how "counterfeit" CD distributors can make up to 900% profit (which Drama and Cannon didn't) and how it is not uncommon for counterfeit CD distributors to be connected with drug and weapon sales (which Drama and Cannon aren't).

What does this mean for a website with the phrase "Mix Tape" (by the way, our Automatic Mix Tape Generator is back up) in the title? It wouldn't hurt to think up some alternate titles and even formats to avoid an RIAA bust of our own. But since it would be too much of a hassle to go back and change the initials every time "TMT" was used in the body of an archived article, we might have to switch to something that keeps the same initials but is politically friendly towards RIAA and related groups. Possibilities include:

The Microphone Titans (Hip-Hop)

Totally Metal Tales (Metal)

Thoroughly Moving Tailfeathers (Pop)

True Man's Tractor (Country)

Tickle My Testicles (Current Version)

Twenty-one Means Twenty-one (Dedicated to Stephen Baldwin's Clothing Line With the Guy From Korn)

Tough Meat Times (Alt-Rock)

...And so on and so forth.

Once again, all of this is due to two people making mix tapes.

Merzbow and Others Confirmed for No Fun Fest 2007

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;dsflkjdsafl $#WOIu Merzbow aslkdj43 $$$$ 93@(#)* #W(#l..... )(*$* $ .... 0(*$$) %% ($#(#(#((#(#(#(( #(8 $#)( @!)@@@@@ 0($ $#)( 9$#)( $#%)( #) $ 0)(4 $ $ 8=D $#)(%*(*# @@@ #9 #(9 %%%

#$)(W#% $#)(%$# , No Fun Fest.. 0(#W%843w5WRE> s43lkdsR9(%((%(%. 0(%(%% Q#W) w/334$[ $W)9349 @@ @ 439 $#JG$ GDL$)(W* T LDSJF.04(( $% #(9999 #@Q*$# 59555%% @Q@) #@. This should help us sell some ad space.

I Guess LCD Soundsystem Will Just Have To Learn To Be Satisfied With The Sound Of Silver, But Seriously, Guys, Let?s Shoot For The Sound Of Gold Next Time

Alright, listen up! James Murphy (you know, the guy from DFA that made it cool for uncool people to dance, which made it cool, I think? Has someone got a flowchart?) has stuffed the new LCD Soundsystem LP firmly into his release tube and is ready to fire it all over the world. Ooh, I'm so excited just thinking about it!

Recorded at a farm in New York, The Sound of Silver apparently finds LCD Soundsystem further expanding their sonic palette, taking their experimental impulses to wild new places, but also firmly establishing themselves as a singularly great pop group. Here, pulsing beats, abstract funk, crystal melodies, and towering walls of sound combine to create a sound genuinely like no other. Alright, I got that bit off the press release. Sue me. It features performances from the LCD Soundsystem live members, including Pat Mahoney, Tyler Pope, and Nancy Wh?

Um.

Nancy Wha?

I can do this! I can do this.

Nancy Whahahahaha!

Nancy Whang. There you go.

Clever lead-in joke to the tracklisting:

Glasses Are Useful, A Short Play by Heidi Vanderslice (Alternate Title: The Constantines Are, Like, Touring or Something)

Setting: The Warsaw Club, Brooklyn, watching The Constantines

Characters: Myself, my +1 Jess

Jess [surveying the stage]: Where's the cute one? Where'd he go?

HV: Jess, they're twins.

Jess: No, they're not. No, they're not. That one's cuter.

HV: He can't be cuter. They're twins. [starting to feel like she's in the Chris Kattan/Jimmy Fallon SNL sketch where they score dates with twins, and the Rachel Dratch twin has a baby doll arm growing out of her head]

Jess: Hey, little dude, I swear, I like that one better.

HV: [gesturing wildly] You're not wearing any fucking glasses!

Jess: Yes, I am. Oh. No, I'm not. Fine. [Puts on her glasses] Oh. They're both pretty cute. [Pointing at stage] Heyyy! Heyyy.

HV: I need another drink.

Brooklyn Lager goes well with these dates, but you might have troubles finding it, eh?:

Badly Drawn Boy Sez:

Please don't run away:

  

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