How Los Campesinos! Are Like Linux. A Short Essay with Bullet Points.
By Scout Leader Kyle on 01-08-2008
Wales' sexy indie pop band Los Campesinos! are a lot like those crazy open-source Linux users. First off, "los campesinos" is Spanish for "the peasants," which could also be used to describe Linux users. You see, these people get little-to-no compensation for what they do, but still love helping each other out. It's actually pretty cute. Which brings me to my next point: Have you seen the Linux mascot, Tux? He's like the cutest penguin ever! And Los Campesinos! are pretty damn cute as well (especially Harriett... oh I love it when she plays the violin).
That's just surface-level shit. Check it:
- Los Campesinos!'s new album is called Hold on Now Youngster..., and it opens up with a track called "Death to Los Campesinos!" The title convinces me of the group's assuredly Linux roots, what with Steve Jobs and Bill Gates continually screaming "Death to Linux Users!" from atop their closed kingdoms. Okay, that's kinda dubious. But there's more.
- Track three "Don't Tell Me to Do the Maths" (probably) focuses on how Linux users are total fuggin' nerds and don't like to be told what to do. (Word to the wise: these motherfuckers are stubborn; just ask them to fix your computer, and they'll just offer to install Ubuntu instead. No questions asked; they hate questions, but they have all the answers.)
- "We Are All Accelerated Readers" sums up how much smarter these crazy technophiles are than you. But they've always stood out intellectually -- that's why they're Linux users. They love bashing Apple users for their jackassedness when it comes to brand loyalty, but you better be damn sure the Linux users love being in with the "out crowd," and they want you to know it.
- Despite their elitist behavior, the Linux doods are nice. Yeah, that's right. That's why on track nine, "You! Me! Dancing!," Los Campesinos! sing about how Linux lovers want everyone to be living harmoniously in some kind of pseudo-communist society, where everyone lives underneath the GNU license. Yeah, it'd be weird, but somehow I think we'd all be happy. Plus, our computers would at least work. (Fuck you Vista.)
So, check out Los Campesinos!'s debut album, Hold on Now Youngster..., and find out whether or not it's truly about the magical world of Linux when it's released February 25 in the UK and April 1 here in the states. You can download the digital album from Arts&Crafts February 25 as well. But whatever you do, don't play the trax in iTunes because that shit is closed source. Get another program like Totem or some shit.
I hope you are viewing this tracklisting on your open source Firefox browser:
1. Death to Los Campesinos!
2. Broken Heartbeats Sound Like Breakbeats
3. Don't Tell Me to Do the Math(s)
4. Drop It Doe Eyes
5. My Year in Lists
6. Knee Deep at ATP
7. This Is How You Spell. "HAHAHA, We Destroyed the Hopes and Dreams of a Generation of Faux-Romantics"
8. We Are All Accelerated Readers
9. You! Me! Dancing!
10. ...And We Exhale and Roll Our Eyes in Unison
11. Sweet Dreams, Sweet Cheeks
Be sure to put these awesome tour dates in your open-source calendar program:
# ATP vs. Pitchfork
* with Les Savy Fav, Future of the Left, Cut Off Your Hands
Stars to Tour Europe, In Order to Tour Must Leave Their Bedroom After the War
By AJ Pacitti on 01-08-2008
Get ready, my galactic-a-go-go guys and gals. Hell, even mark up your Belle and Sebastian calendar*. Stars is touring Europe, starting January 22 in Ireland.
What better way to ring in 2008? Especially since you OBVIOUSLY have a Belle and Sebastian calendar to mark up.
Did I also mention, reader baby, that I really love Nesquik, Red Bull, Ray Bans, Google, and American Express?
Tour dates probably inadvertently supported by Nesquik, Red Bull, Ray Bans, Google and American Express (I mean, isn’t everything?):
* Indie product placement-a-go-go
Le Loup Tours WITHOUT Bodies of Water Bodies of Water Tour with Le Loup in 960,375-Part Vocal Harmony
By Heidi Vanderslice on 01-08-2008
UPDATE (1/9): We originally reported that Bodies of Water and Le Loup are going on tour together. Turns out, Bodies of Water are instead going on tour with Sons & Daughters. Updated tourdates below, but we kept the same story, because, shit, why not keep things a little confusing? We're living in confusing times, my friends. -Editor
So, my theory is that some merry tricksters at Secretly Canadian called up Nick and Sarah over at Hardly Art and the conversation went something like this:
SC: So you have that band, Le Loup.HA: Uh... yeah.
SC: It has about 75 people in it playing 84 different instruments.
HA: Truth.
SC: We have a band that does that too. We think they're pretty good.
HA: Yeah? Well, ours likes to bust a move on stage once in a while. Collectively.
SC: My band does too. I bet they'd kick your band's lily asses in that department.
HA: I bet not.
SC: I'll bet you a U.S. tour.
HA: You're on.
SC: Great! The first date is in Dallas, Texas. Don't be late! (hangs up)
HA: Uh... I think we just booked a tour for Le Loup. Oh well. Cool. Except they're not going to fucking Texas; I'll say that right now!
I mean, you can take this or leave it. Just throwing it out there. Either way, this'll be a rager of a tour. A very well-orchestrated rager, I might add.
The French horn is cool again (THESE DATES ARE LE LOUP DATES, NO BODIES OF WATER):
