Future of the Left announce fall US tour, and Jack Black is probably all like “hells yeah, broseph”

Future of the Left announce fall US tour, and Jack Black is probably all like "hells yeah, broseph"

I’m sitting here at this Formica desk. I’m watching the blades of the ceiling fan cruelly quantize the lazy flow of my chump workday. I bite my dry bottom lip. I sigh. I let my hot eyes droop back down toward my computer screen. Damn, I hate that blinking cursor. Blah. I know how news stories like this usually start: Welch ass-kickers Future of the Left are well-known for their predilection for yelling all the time, both on and off the stage. Etc. etc. I should be off to the races from there. But I just can’t do it. I just don’t have the energy today. How can I do a high-octane band like FOTL justice in a mood like this? I let my eyes gaze, out of focus, at my stained, empty coffee mug, and I start to…

“We’ve got a fall tour of the United States coming up at the end of Octobaaaaah!”

Wha? FOTL frontman Andrew Falkous? What are you doing here? I mean, gee, sorry, man. I know you do. But like, I was out kinda late last night, and…

“Our new album, The Plot Against Common Sense (TMT Review) c-c-c-came out this yeeeeeeeeeeeaaar!”

Oh, did it? I haven’t really gotten around to listening to it that much. I still kinda like your first one though. Though, truly, how many loud, fuzzy, honking, steamy, balls-to-the-walls lambaste-rock albums does a person need in his or her collection? Seems to me like one or two go-tos is enough for when the mood strik—

“You don’t know whatcha talkin’ Abouuuut! The world needs its sweaty SWEATY rock and rollllllll, yeah! And speakin’ of sweaty, when’s the last time ya gotcho fat ass to the gyyyyyyym-ah?!”

Hey, shut up, Falkous. Do you fucking want me to post your band’s dates or not? Cuz I can shut this thing down right now.

“No, no, dude, we’re coooooooool! No hard a-feeeeeeelainz-ah! Yeah! Anyway, I gotta jeeee-yet-ah! TIME TO WAKE UP, MOTHA FUCKAAAAA!!!”

Huh? Wha? Uh Oh. Shit. Was I just asleep? Boy, what an oddly thin-plotted dream I just had. Anyway, more coffee. Then tourdates…

10.30.12 - Towson, MD - Recher Theatre
10.31.12 - Boston, MA - The Sinclair
11.01.12 - Philadelphia, PA - Union Transfer
11.02.12 - New York, NY - Le Poisson Rouge
11.03.12 - Cleveland, OH - The Grog Shop
11.04.12 - Detroit, MI - The Magic Stick
11.05.12 - Chicago, IL - The Bottom Lounge
11.06.12 - Minneapolis, MN - The Triple Rock Social Club
11.08.12 - Denver, CO - Marquis Theatre
11.09.12 - Salt Lake City, UT - Kilby Court
11.10.12 - Boise, ID - The Venue
11.14.12 - San Francisco, CA - Slim’s
11.15.12 - Los Angeles, CA - Echoplex
11.16.12 - San Diego, CA - Che Café
11.17.12 - San Diego, CA - Che Café
11.18.12 - Phoenix, AZ - The Crescent
11.20.12 - Austin, TX - Red 7
11.23.12 - St. Louis, MO - Ciceros
11.25.12 - Buffalo, NY - Mohawk Place
11.26.12 - Hoboken, NJ - Maxwells
11.27.12 - Brooklyn, NY - Knitting Factory

• Future of the Left: http://futureoftheleft.net
• Xtra Mile: http://xtramilerecordings.com

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