Last week, the United States officially reminded the world's terrorists to "please stay focused" when the Guinness World Record was handed out to a high school junior from Rochester, Minnesota for "highest score for a song" on the video game Guitar Hero III: Legends of Rock, a.k.a. that game where players shred the ol' 6-string (uh, there are no strings) while watching a video screen to score points based on how well they pretend to play along with a song. This somehow-noteworthy, record-setting effort came during Guinness' launch of its über-nerdy Gamer's Edition 2008. No really. Check it out.
Competing against other presumably jobless gamers in New York City last week, 16-year-old Chris Chike earned a graaaaaaand total of 870,647 points (or 97% completion on "Expert" Level, so they tell me) for the umm... yeah, for the song "Through the Fire and Flames" by DragonForce.
What's the matter? Not familiar??? Oh, well, let's fix that right now, reader friend.
"It's like out of this world," the Century High School junior with poor diction unoriginally said after setting the mark on the, you know, fake plastic guitar. Meanwhile dear old Kai Huang, co-founder of the creators of Guitar Hero, reportedly said, "We congratulate Chris on a fantastic accomplishment that is worthy of a Guinness World Record." Now that's an emotional man.
Chike also reportedly said in an interview with the Rochester Post-Bulletin that he "has gotten a higher score playing at home." He also told the newspaper that he used to play four to five hours a day, but added that he doesn't play so much anymore "because it's not as challenging." God, Chris, I really hope that there weren't any girls listening to that.
Anyway, the praise for this little milestone just keeps on coming. "Chris' accomplishments are nothing short of amazing," said Guinness World Records judge Doug Parsons, who, sadly enough, had to be on hand to certify the attempt. "The speed and accuracy showed by Chris today truly cements his spot as gaming royalty."
Meanwhile, in Iraq, thousands have died.
