How Do You Call Your Lover Boy? Me? I Yell, “NEW YORK DOLLS TOURDATES!”

As I was lying in a hospital bed, a rock 'n' roll nurse got into my head. She said, "Hold out your arm, girl, stick out your tongue. I got some New York Dolls tourdates, I'm gonna give you some." I think you know the rest of the story, and I don't have to detail the tawdry girl-on-girl action for you. Suffice it to say I got some pills for my love, to put me at ease, and some time later that rock 'n' roll nurse shook me down to my knees.

I woke up on the downtown 2 train a few days after that strange--but not entirely unprecedented--experience with a wicked hangover and a bloody nose. Pinned to my torn shirt was a list of tourdates scribbled in lipstick. Once I got over the initial shock, I realized that my last memory was of going to see the Dolls perform a free show at South Street Seaport. Surreal as the situation was (David Johansen in a tight t-shirt performing between a Pizzeria Uno and a war ship), the injuries and track marks were well worth it.

Lucky for you non-New Yorkers, David Johansen, Syl Sylvain, and some new guys are taking their show on the road for the first time in more than 30 years. The boys are touring in support of a new album, presciently titled One Day It Will Please Us to Remember Even This (Roadrunner). I hear that if you come home from their show without a needle sticking out of your arm or a vicious nurse-hickey on your neck, you get your money back:

11.06.06 - San Diego, CA - Belly Up
11.07.06 - Los Angeles, CA - Avalon
11.08.06 - San Francisco, CA - The Independent
11.10.06 - Portland, OR - Berbati's Pan
11.11.06 - Seattle - El Corazon
11.14.06 - Minneapolis, MN - Fine Line
11.15.06 - Chicago, IL - Vic Theatre
11.16.06 - Detroit - St. Andrews
11.17.06 - Cleveland, OH - Beachland Ballroom
11.18.06 - Buffalo, NY - Town Ballroom
11.20.06 - Boston, MA - Axis
11.21.06 - Providence, RI - Lupo's
11.22.06 - New York, NY - Irving Plaza
11.24.06 - Atlantic City, NJ - Borgata
11.25.06 - Philadelphia, PA - TLA
11.26.06 - Washington, DC - Black Cat
11.28.06 - Charleston, SC - Music Farm
11.29.06 - Atlanta, GA - Variety Playhouse
12.01.06 - Nashville, TN - City Hall
12.02.06 - St. Louis, MO - TBA