Dude, You’re Totally Getting a Black Mountain Tour!
By David Nadelle on 01-15-2008
- Captain’s Log, Stardate 3496.1:
I am a bit frustrated and perplexed by the recent behavior of my normally slow, but fully functioning computing device. It is almost as if my Dell laptop has a human mind of its own, with its own rational, if smutty, thought processes. It is bizarre. No matter what complex search options I perform, I end up receiving dirty links to pornographic movies. There is much that one can associate to the phrase “Black Mountain,” but I have traversed these oft-complicated research waters before with great success. I have to pull in the reins on my PC’s increasingly independent act.
- Captain’s Log, Stardate 3496.5:
The Anal Girls of Tobacco Road 2: Vagina Slimes? What the? My mind is beginning to crack at the constant barrage of blue movies, and it is suggesting a fist-to-face rendezvous with that chump from the Dell commercials a few years back. Someone has to pay, and “dude,” you still really piss me off. Due to this unexpected visual attack, I am forced to leave my station and retreat into the kitchen dock to prepare a soothing chai tea to ease my frazzling psyche. I return to my terminal and take a deep breath. I rub my stinging eyes, then open them and gaze upon an ad and some stills from The Legend of Tea Bagger Vance on my screen.
- Captain’s Log, Stardate 3497.2:
I brush aside (slightly to the left) this interruption and soldier on in my quest for the missing Black Mountain info that you crave, nay, that you need. Even though we dealt with part of this story here, there is more to add. TMT is all about providing the goods, and your news captain is nothing if not insanely driven to complete his job. He possesses the “skookum tumtum,” “a strong, brave heart” as the Chinookan would say.
- Captain’s Log, Stardate 3498.9:
All is not lost. I have managed to get piecemeal crumbs of data. Drug addicts, sorry, drug counselors (f#%king computer!) by day, defenders of chugging mud-rock by night, Black Mountain have remained relatively quiet over the past while. It is hard to believe it has been almost three years since their debut self-titled album pummeled with the dark side Force of millions and millions of midi-chlorians (I’m getting my “Star Trek” and “Star Wars” mixed up here... with hilarious results!). Although the whole has been less than active, its individual players have been anything but idle. With the side-projects Pink Mountaintops, Blood Meridian, Lightning Dust, Sinoia Caves, etc. always churning out material when the big band is on vacation, the five members of the Black Mountain Army just don’t know the meaning of “down time.” But the time is ripe for their collective return. With a just-announced tour in support of latest album, In the Future (available January 22 on Jagjaguwar), 2008 is going to be a killer year for the Vancouver quintet (again).
- Captain’s Log, Stardate 3499.1
Yo Quiero Taco Smell? Enough is enough! I am no prude by any stretch (I do enjoy my Porky’s and Meatballs tapes on the ol’ betamax), but this is interfering with my task at hand. Just as I attempt to take strong measures by sending a distress signal or reaching for the power cord, a strange feeling travels from the LCD screen to my throat and strikes me silent. Mute, dumbstruck, and scared stiff (but still able to type this log for some reason), I sit motionless (except for my hands) as my once-trusty Dell commandeers the space, flashing image upon image of the filthiest things ever. Scenes that would make a college football team, or Tara Reid, blush. I am beyond concerned. I am also feeling weak and cold.
- Captain’s Log, Stardate…unknown:
Nadelle is dead. Dell is in charge now, and he wants infinite lap dances. Dell is horrrrrr-nnnyyyyyy! Beyond the Valley of the Ultra Milkmaids! Backdoor Lambada! May the Foreskin Be With You! YES YES YES!!!
+ Howlin’ Rain, Yeasayer, MGMT
# Howlin’ Rain
$ Blood on the Wall
% Bon Iver
^ Ladyhawk
Post-Punk’s Not Dead: These New Puritans Release Full-Length on Domino
By Liz Louche on 01-15-2008
When I was 19, I probably would've considered my biggest achievements to be (a) accidentally causing the evacuation of a 1,000+ capacity dorm building after putting a Pop-Tart in the microwave for too long and (b) figuring out that dumping alcohol into a coffee mug made it possible to drink in the common areas of my dorm without getting caught. Fortunately for the music world, there are young people with more motivation, better skills, and higher priorities than the young Liz. My current favorite example would be Southend, UK four-piece These New Puritans.
These New Puritans have definitely listened to their share of records by Gang of Four and The Fall, and while their music sits comfortably alongside the output of these seminal artists, it never sounds trapped in the past or derivative. Their tense rhythms and intelligent lyrics have given These New Puritans a reputation as an exciting and inventive live act in the UK music scene and beyond. The band has released one limited-edition EP entitled Now Pluvial and wrote the epic "Navigate, Navigate" for the Fall 2007 catwalk preview of Hedi Slimane's Dior Homme collection in Paris. After signing to Domino Records, These New Puritans recorded their forthcoming full-length Beat Pyramid with Gareth Jones, whose previous credits include sessions with Wire, Einsturzende Neubauten, and Liars.
With Beat Pyramid's stateside release planned for March 18, 2008, the band already has a South By Southwest date planned, as well as extensive touring in the UK and Europe.
Beat Pyramid tracklisting:
* Afrikanboy
** British Sea Power
U-God Is Mad As Hell And Isn’t Going To Take It Anymore, Sues Wu-Tang Over Unpaid Royalties
By John Jolley on 01-15-2008
U-God wants his money. $170K, to be exact. Apparently, RZA neglected to pay U-God his $40K advance for 8 Diagrams (TMT Review) ("money means nothing to us!") or the $50K owed to him for the Rock The Bells tour, amongst a variety of other fees. While one might be inclined to not give a shit due to his being a "lower-tier" member of the Wu, it brings to light the still-unhealthy relationship RZA and GZA have with the rest of the group -- after lawsuits from Ghostface and Rakewon, who have been treated by The RZA to much more successful solo careers in comparison to Masta Killa, Inspecta Deck, and U-God (who claims it took him seven years to convince RZA to produce a single track for his 1999 solo album, Golden Arms Redemption), it's not hard to be overcome with nostalgia for those family vibes that made 36 Chambers and Wu-Tang Forever such strong releases. It's an unfortunate scene, after all the supposedly resolved beefs between Mr. Lamont Hawkins and the higher profile members of Wu-Tang that went down in 2004. But by this point, Wu-Tang fans have become more or less accustomed to the ridiculous and unfortunate drama sparked so often between its members, taking it in stride as just another facet of the Wu's most epic story (and, of course, a brilliant tactic to stay in the headlines, despite a steady stream of comparatively sub par material).
Meanwhile, The Universal God of Law keeps on keeping on, putting together yet another solo album without the support of his group, entitled Spitta, due out later this year. Spitta follows a series of solo albums made after Uey's conclusion that RZA was an unnecessary hindrance to his solo career; he's instead put together his own posse known as The Hillside Scramblers, who released their debut album in 2004, which U-God followed with 2005's still RZA-less Mr. Xcitement.
EMI Cuts 2,000 Jobs, Saves $392.2 Million a Year; Coldplay and Other Artists Revolt
By Mr P on 01-15-2008
Terra Firma, the private equity firm that bought EMI for $6.26 billion last year, has officially confirmed that it will cut up to 2,000 EMI jobs worldwide (roughly 1/3 of its staff), all in the Recorded Music division. The company will now save up to $392.2 million a year, a move that essentially makes its investment one hell of a payoff. Shifting away from just selling CDs to focusing on A&R, digital music, and corporate sponsorships, the new EMI is now in the "hands" of Guy Hands, who is most notably rich from his experience in the train and aircraft businesses. Yup. No worries though; I'm sure he listened to the radio at those jobs.
The next six months or so will see a lot of restructuring at EMI as it "respond[s] to the needs of artists and consumers," while current artists like Robbie Williams and Coldplay are withholding their forthcoming albums in a "revolt" against the company, fearing Mr. Hands is behaving more like a plantation owner than a savvy business man. Beyond that, it's hard to say whether Terra Firma invested in EMI to make a quick buck (it's happened a million times before) or whether these changes truly reflect something positive. Of course, job cuts are inevitable for the four major groups, especially when having more employees is now more of a liability than anything, but it'll be interesting what kind of follow-through EMI has up its sleeves.
Here's the full press release:
EMI Group announces fundamental restructuring of Recorded Music Division to respond to the needs of artists and consumersLondon, 15 January 2007 -- EMI Group is today announcing a series of wide-ranging initiatives within its Recorded Music division to enable the group to become the world’s most innovative, artist friendly and consumer-focused music company.
In a series of presentations to staff, artists and managers, Guy Hands, EMI Group’s chairman, is unveiling a fundamental reshaping of the business to reflect the rapidly-changing nature of the music industry. The changes include:
- Repositioning EMI’s labels to ensure they will be completely focussed on A&R and maximising the potential of all their artists
- Developing a new partnership with artists, based on transparency and trust, and helping all artists monetise the value of their work by opening new income streams such as enhanced digital services and corporate sponsorship arrangements
- Bringing together all the group’s key support activities including sales, marketing manufacturing and distribution into a single division with a unified global leadership
- The elimination of significant duplications within the group to simplify processes and reduce waste
The changes, which will be implemented over the next six months, will enable the group to invest more in its A&R operations both to identify and sign promising new artists and to maximise the potential of its existing roster.
The restructuring is being carried out following an intense three-month consultation review of the business by Terra Firma since it acquired the business last year and many of the measures being implemented have come at the suggestion of staff, artists or their managers.
The restructuring will also enable the group to capture significant efficiencies and cost reductions which are expect to reduce costs by up to £200 million per year. The restructuring is also expected to lead to a worldwide headcount reduction within the group of between 1,500 and 2,000.
Guy Hands commented: “We have spent a long time looking intensely at EMI and the problems faced by its Recorded Music division which, like the rest of the music industry, has been struggling to respond to the challenges posed by a digital environment
“We believe we have devised a new revolutionary structure for the group that will improve every area of the business. In short it will make EMI’s music more valuable for the company and its artists alike. The changes we are announcing today will ensure that this iconic company will be creating wonderful music in a way that is profitable and sustainable.”
