Madonna Signs Progressive Deal With Live Nation, Is Still Nowhere NEAR as Cool as Radiohead

So, it’s no secret at this point (and truthfully, it’s debatable as to whether or not it ever actually was) that Radiohead is the most amazing band in the WORLD. Their musical choices over the past decade have been impeccably trend-setting, and, love or hate the actual MUSIC, there’s still no debating that Thom Yorke and Co. are the clear front-runners in the race to be the most culturally significant, ahead of the curve, paradigm-shifting recording artists to ever dabble in the man-eating cesspool that is the Music Industry.

Yup, everyone else might as well just pack it in, I say. Ask anyone, even Mr P, and they’ll tell you that Radiohead have hands-down done more than just about anyone lately when it comes to turning the Recording Industry on its ear and...

And...

Wait just a minute, folks! It looks like a dark horse is coming up from behind! A dark horse wearing hot pink tights, that is...

That’s right! Madonna, of all people, seems to have struck the second blow in this whole “Major Label Recording Artists Lashing Out Against the Music Industry” battle that seems to be a brewin’ these days. Last week, the Material Girl seemed a whole lot less acquisitive and a whole lot more business savvy when she confirmed her split from her posh former home of Warner Brothers and her new widely-rumored deal with concert promoter Live Nation.

“Concert Promoter??” you say? “She “signed” with a Concert Promoter??

Yup. And while the extent of the benefits of this strange partnership have yet to be explored, it looks as though Live Nation will be handling her future album releases, tours, DVDs, slutty '80s clothing lines, adorable children books, piss-poor Hollywood movies, and anything else that the old cougar can concoct for the Madonna brand. This kick-ass deal will not only leave Prince pissed-off that he didn’t think of this first, but it will also parcel out $120 million to the glam girl over ten years, including an $18 million signing bonus and three album advances of about $17 million each that she can spend on as many cone-shaped bras and shit as she wants to. Some of the deal will even include stock in Live Nation (even Thom Yorke didn’t think of that one). The global partnership with the company will ultimately find Madonna becoming the founding artist in Live Nation's new “Artist Nation” division, which will be headed by former Rolling Stones tour producer Michael Cohl. You know, Michael Cohl! Duh!

"The paradigm in the music business has shifted, and as an artist and a business woman, I have to move with that shift," Madonna cutely understated. "For the first time in my career, the way that my music can reach my fans is unlimited. I've never wanted to think in a limited way, and with this new partnership, the possibilities are endless. Who knows how my albums will be distributed in the future? That's what's exciting about this deal - everything is possible. Live Nation has offered me a true partnership, and after 25 years in the business, I feel that I deserve that." Okay, false alarm; looks like she is still a material girl after all. Pheww!

"Madonna is a true icon and maverick as an artist and in business," stated Live Nation President and CEO Michael Rapino. I am thrilled that Madonna, who is also now a shareholder in our company, has joined with us to create a new business model for our industry. Bringing all the varied elements of Madonna's stunning music career into the Artist Nation and Live Nation family, moves her future and the future of our company into a unique and extraordinary place... Our partnership is a defining moment in music history.” Ummm, dude, have you even heard of In Rainbows???

Rapino also positioned the concert industry as replacing the record labels as the focus of the music industry. "We believe that the internet is the live concert promoters best friend, although it might have crippled the record label business," Rapino said. "The live business [is] connected to the fan, directly, which enables us to sell singles and downloads and everything the consumer wants.”

The rabid Rapino was also quick to play the cool-guy card of dissing Ye Olde Ineffectual Record Labels. “The concert is now moving to the center of the circle for the artist. The artist is now looking for the live show and everything that can be done around the live show." He added "We believe that the Madonna fan who is buying a $200 concert ticket is in our database, and we have a direct relationship with them. We think we can sell them a 99-cent download, or a $14 dollar T-shirt. The ticket is now the center of the transaction." Um, is this a bad time for me to mention that I spent $0.00 on In Rainbows? (What!? I said it! 160kbps my ass!)

Either way, the Record Industry may be on its deathbed, but it still has one final bowel-full of shit to evacuate before it kicks it. The 49-year-old singer/actress still owes Warner one final studio album and a greatest hits package under her current contract. But Madonna, unlike the best band in the world Radiohead, seems relatively at ease with that. "My time with Warner Bros. Records has been great," she said. "I appreciate their hard work and value the many relationships I have developed over the years with the label in the U.S. and around the world. I have an album coming out with them next year and I'm excited about it. We still have work to do together."

Hmmm. As Thom Yorke might say, “This one’s optimistic.”

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