Mario Speedwagon’s Under The Radar News Round Up: Conor Oberst, Jim James, and M. Ward = Monsters of Folk, A Bunch of Bitches Go On Tour to Support Their Newly Released or Soon to Be Released Albums: AA Bondy, These United States, Magnolia Electric Co.

- Remember how Conor Oberst, Jim James, and M. Ward were going to make a record together? Well they did, and it comes out September 22, and it's called Monsters of Folk. Seriously. The band also features Oberst’s Bright Eyes bandmate Mike Mogis.

- AA Bondy are currently on tour supporting their second album, When The Devil’s Loose, which comes out September 1 via Fat Possum. "Fresh" from Bonnaroo, they'll continue trekking it until July 7 where shit ends at the Spanish Moon in Red Stick, LA. You can check out the dates by scrolling around in here.

- These United States are also releasing an album on September 1 -- their third, entitled Everything Touches Everything, out via United Interests. And guess fucking what? They’re going to go on tour. Their dates include shows with Dr. Dog, Phosphorescent, Deer Tick, Dusty Rhodes, and Red Cortez. They start in mid-June in Chicago and continue to the end of July where it all winds down in New York City. Dates on the MySpace, yo.

- Magnolia Electric Co. is releasing a record and going on tour (with The Donkeys!) First things first: the record comes out July 21 on Secretly Canadian and is called Josephine. The tour kicks off July 10 in Bloomington, IN at Russian Recordings and ends August 8 in Dubuque, IA at Busted Lift. Dates on the MySpace, yo.

Vinyl Sales Numbers Are In! 1’s and 0’s Are Out! Sorta. Not Really. Maybe? Nevermind.

Yes, yes, yes. The lovely little vinyl resurgence that has vindicated so many of us High Fidelity-watching (reading?), 160kbps-abhorring, laser-loathing lunatics feels pretty good, doesn’t it? But not so fast; before you go running around at 33 1/3 rpm declaring victory, you need, as Kafka cruelly puts it, “only to change your direction.”

The numbers still show a niche market for the medium of kings, for the time being. In fact, vinyl accounts for less than one percent of broader album sales in the U.S., according to Nielsen Soundscan. Ouch. Seriously? Yes. But the good news is that sales are expected to grow another 50% this year to 2.8-million units, up from 1.9 million in 2008, according to figures shared at the NARM Conference in San Diego last week. And while, yes, this still ain’t even close to the lifeboat that the major labels are pushing their own wives and children out of in order to claim their spot in, it's still encouraging news for indie labels and discriminatin’ record stores everywhere. Indeed, last year independent retailers accounted for 70% of total vinyl sales, but they already account for a hefty 67% halfway through this year.

And while percentage increases are beginning to cool year to year, absolute gains are steadily increasing. In 2008, the format added just under 887,000 units, a 90% gain. By the end of 2009, another 938,000 are projected to sell - a milder 50% gain. See?? Weird. But weirder still may be the market feedback on just who the heck is buying all of this wax. In April, at the MUSEXPO in Los Angeles, a number of executives pointed to fans purchasing vinyl without owning a turntable -- merely for the memento, which they probably need to go with their vintage Rolling Stones t-shirts from Target. Also, check this: one of the best-selling vinyl albums is Guns N' Roses' Chinese Democracy (TMT Review), which MUST be getting snatched up by collectors, because it surely isn’t being listened to by fans of actual music. Anyway, a more detailed ranking can be found on slide 25 of this Nielsen Soundscan presentation.

And then there’s the other question that mankind can’t help but ask: what happens next? What happens after 2009? Well, check this nonsense. According to one veteran executive with expertise in the format, future growth will be challenged by limited manufacturing capacity. "All plants are producing as fast as they can, and are still behind on fulfilling orders," the executive shared. So why not ramp capacities upward, and meet the blossoming demand? Not in Obama’s America! Turns out that manufacturers are hesitant to pour capital into something that could end up being a fad. Retailers may also shy away from paying for new racks or reconfiguring floorspace. "No one knows if this rally will sustain, so no one wants to invest money in new equipment to ramp up production capacity to meet increasing demand," the source continued. "Therefore, we're probably stuck where we are for the foreseeable future as far as market share."

Yeeek. Yeah, we wouldn’t wanna go around putting our faith in something as tainted and stained as Capitalism, I guess.

Athens’ Georgia Theatre On Fire

From the Associated Press:

Police say a major fire has erupted at the landmark Georgia Theatre in Athens that has been a venue for Georgia bands including REM, Widespread Panic and the B-52s.

Witnesses said the fire began around 7 a.m. Friday and was a major blaze. They said the converted movie theater would likely suffer major damage.

Former Athens Mayor Doc Eldridge said he saw a huge plume of black smoke when he arrived at his nearby office in the downtown business district.

- Georgia Theatre official website
- Athens Banner-Herald
- The Atlanta Journal-Constitution

[Photo: Mario Speedwagon]

The Pains Of Being Pure At Heart Team Up With Cymbals Eat Guitars For Fall Tour; Bloggers Seek Out Change of Underwear

What happens when an indie buzz band from Brooklyn (The Pains Of Being Pure At Heart) and one from Staten Island (Cymbals Eat Guitars) team up for a joint fall tour together? I don’t know about you, but I smell a sitcom! Will they argue about which borough is better? Will the guitarist from Pains borrow the guitarist from Cymbals’ last pair of skinny jeans and accidentally rip the crotch? Will they have a masturbating contest? And who will draw the bigger crowd at their shows? You can find out the answers to all these questions (and so much more!) by tuning in this fall — err, I mean purchasing a ticket to one of the following shows:

Pains:
07.10.09 - New York, NY – South Street Seaport
07.18.09 - Chicago, IL – Pitchfork Music Festival
07.20.09 - Los Angeles, CA – The Echo
07.21.09 - San Francisco, CA – The Rickshaw Stop
07.23.09 - Portland, OR - Backspace
07.24.09 - Vancouver, BC - Biltmore Cabaret
07.25.09 - Seattle, Washington - Capitol Hill Block Party

Cymbals:
06.29.09 – Allston, MA – Great Scott
07.02.09 – Indianapolis, IN – Vollrath Tavern
07.04.09 – Des Moines, IA – 80/35 Festival
07.07.09 – London, England – Rough Trade Shops Night @ ICA
07.08.09 – London, England – Barfly
07.09.09 – London, England – The Windmill
07.11.09 – London, England – BE @ Proud Galleries
07.18.09 – Chicago, IL – Pitchfork Music Festival

Pains and Cymbals:
09.05.09 - Boston, MA – Middle East Downstairs&
09.06.09 - Montreal, Quebec – La Sala Rossa &
09.07.09 - Toronto, ON – Horseshoe Tavern &
09.08.09 - Chicago, IL – Logan Square Auditorium &
09.09.09 - Madison, WI – Stage Door at the Orpheum &
09.10.09 - Omaha, NE – The Slowdown &
09.12.09 - Morrison, CO – Monolith Festival
09.13.09 - Salt Lake City, UT – Kilby Court &
09.14.09 - Boise, ID - Neurolux &
09.17.09 - Portland, OR – Doug Fir &
09.21.09 - San Diego, CA - Casbah &
09.22.09 - Tucson, AZ – Club Congress&
09.24.09 - Fort Worth, TX – Lola’s &
09.25.09 - Austin, TX – The Mohawk &
09.26.09 - New Orleans, LA – One Eyed Jacks &
09.27.09 - Tallahassee, FL – Club Downunder &
09.28.09 - Atlanta, GA – The Earl &
09.29.09 - Chapel Hill, NC – Local 506 &
09.30.09 - Washington, DC – Black Cat &
10.01.09 - Baltimore, MD - Ottobar &
10.05.09 - Philadelphia, PA – First Unitarian Church &

& The Depreciation Guild

Beck Launches Latest Covert Scientologist Mind-Control Plot Through Fun Little Online Cover-Albums Project; Lord Xenu Shakes Fist in Rage, Beats Hasty Retreat Across Galaxy

So are body thetans a good or bad thing? Do they corrupt my soul and prevent me from achieving self-actualization, or are they a cleansing agent meant to purge the eons of intergalactic suffering from my bodily essence? Sorry, I’m not really up on my Scientologist lore, and unfortunately my access to Wikipedia has been cut off ever since “the incident.”

Anyway, Beck. He’s blonde, he’s boisterous, he’s been an anti-Xenuite since birth, but perhaps most of all he’s a man who owes an enormous debt to his own idiosyncratic influences. While certainly all musicians are beholden to those inspirational artists who preceded them, few stars have been able to enjoy tremendous mainstream success with such a curious cadre of influences as Beck. But as deep in the pockets of past weirdos as Beck is, the man is no ingrate. He’s done his fair share of hat-tipping to those off-kilter trailblazers who came before him. He’s even committed many of his praises to wax, ranging from subtle name-checks in hit singles (e.g. the Gary Wilson shout-out here) to shameless imitation (e.g. some major Gainsbourg coppage here).

With Beck’s new Record Club venture, though, he’s going to be doing a combination of the two. The idea is that Beck and a whole sack-full of his buddies will pick a classic album to cover and then hold court in a studio where they’ll record the entire LP in a single day with no previous rehearsals or arrangement. The songs will then be posted one per week on Beck’s website. The first record on the chopping block is The Velvet Underground and Nico, the sophomore effort of Merseyside legends Gerry and the Pacemakers. The album’s first track, “Sunday Morning,” is already available on Beck’s website, with contributions on this go-round coming from the likes of Nigel Godrich, Thorunn Magnusdottir of Fields, a couple of Beck’s longtime band members, Chris Holmes of Smashing Pumpkins fame (not to be confused with this asshole), actor Giovanni Ribisi (May death fall upon/praise be to body thetans!), and otherz.

So gentleman, start your Twitters! Get ready for a summer you’ll never forget!

Boredoms to Soundtrack Solar Eclipse From Cruise Ship… Duh.

I know, right? Who would have thought that they haven’t done this already? It all seems so simple!

- Step one: Organizers of Tokara The Sun & Moon Festival book themselves a boat. Check.
- Step two: they google the internet to find the most sun worshippin’-est band on the planet. Double check!
- Step three: Boredoms (along with New York’s Gang Gang Dance and Japan’s Goma) show up at their doorstep with a dozen or so drum kits in tow to play a show on a cruise ship in the middle of the ocean during the next Saros 136 eclipse, which, according to all the Boredoms fans at NASA, will take place July 22. The whole ludicrous spectacle is titled “The Lucy in the Sky With Diamond Ring Tour,” and yes, it's guaranteed to be the trippiest fucking thing you’ve ever seen.

But why all the hubbub in the first place? Well, this July’s eclipse will be extraordinarily long — the totality of the eclipse, the point at which the moon is fully obscuring the sun, will reach a whopping (and eerie!) 6 minutes, 39 seconds. According to those NASA sunworshipers, the umbra of the eclipse will cut a path straight across China and the South Pacific, with the best viewpoint off the southern coast of Japan, at 24.2 degrees N, 144.1 degrees E, when the sun is 86 degrees overhead. In other words, shit’s gonna get really wild

But don’t pack your bags just yet. Tickets for this whole “happening” cost a whopping 168,000 yen (about $1,700). And if you read this website daily AND are a giant fan of noise rock, chances are you’re hanging out in a demographic that just doesn’t have that kind of scratch just sitting around. Though, to be fair, for that money, you DO get a heck of a lot: a concert, three DJ sets, organic food, a bed to sleep in, and an area for your kids to keep themselves entertained -- not to mention that whole three-day party on a boat during a total solar eclipse thing. So, in that case: goodbye fall tuition payments -- hello Boredoms!

And speaking of those rascals, don’t forget that Boadrum 9 will be happening at Terminal 5 in New York City September 9 (I’m sure you recall their 77Boadrum show in Brooklyn on 07/07/2007 that brought together 77 drummers for a spectacular outdoor concert, as well as the repeat performance on 08/08/2008 with 88 drummers in New York and California). And while it’s pretty doubtful that 99 drummers will be able to squeeze into the venue, you just never know with these guys. After all, these are the same band that are soundtracking a solar eclipse party from a cruise ship, remember? Tickets for Boadrum 9 are available here.

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