Melvins limited-edition 8-LP box set on sale TODAY; superfans assemble!

Melvins limited-edition 8-LP box set on sale TODAY; superfans assemble!

Like a long-forgotten pirate treasure suddenly washed up on the glistening shores of the internet comes Endless Residency, a limited-edition, crazy rare Melvins 8-LP box set of live recordings from the legendary hard rockers’ January residency at Los Angeles club Spaceland (now going by the name of Satellite). But get out your metal detectors, wacked-out hippie beachcombers and stoner rock superfans, because this shit ain’t cheap. If you head on over to Rock Is Hell to wage noble battle against roving online hordes of Melvins completists, you can be expecting to drop a cool €130 on these silkscreened little gems.

It’s important to note that you should leave the swashbuckling at home, though. The competition may be tough — there are only 500 copies available — but Rock Is Hell will only allow you to purchase one copy per order. Ordering started up at 6 PM in Austria (you do the conversion), so get out your pocket watches/sundials/what-have-you and figure out what time it is where YOU are and count your doubloons. Hear that? Across the ocean, these onyx-like black discs of sonic thunder are calling your name like a seashell held to the ear. And yeah, you know there’s an even more limited run involving colored vinyl. Orange, to be exact. Fifty copies, to be even exacter. ORANGE. Buzzo’s favorite color (maybe). The color of gallantry. The color that’s kind of close to gold. Pirate gold. Record collector gold. Melvins fan gold. Also golden: the charming artwork by Mackie Osborne. Orders ship at the end of September; check out some tourdates from their Euro tour while you’re waiting.


09.30.11 - Cardiff, Wales - The Globe
10.02.11 - Feyzin, France - L’Epicerie Moderne
10.04.11 - Rome, Italy - Circolo degli Artisti
10.05.11 - Bologna, Italy - Estragon
10.06.11 - Mezzago, Italy - Bloom
10.07.11 - Geneva, Switzerland - KAB Usine
10.08.11 - Zurich, Switzerland - Rote Fabrik
10.09.11 - Munich, Germany - Feierwerk/Hansa 39
10.10.11 - Vienna, Austria - Arena
10.11.11 - Ljubljana, Slovenia - Cvetlicarna Mediapark
10.12.11 - Zagreb, Croatia - Tvornica Kulture
10.13.11 - Prague, Czech Republic - Lucerna Music Bar
10.14.11 - Erfurt, Germany - Stadtgarten
10.15.11 - Wroclaw, Poland - Firlej
10.16.11 - Berlin, Germany - Volksbühne
10.17.11 - Copenhagen, Denmark - Lille Vega
10.18.11 - Oslo, Norway - Blå
10.20.11 - Tampere, Finland - Klubi
10.21.11 - Helsinki, Finland - Tavastia
10.23.11 - Stockholm, Sweden - Hornstull Strand Etablissement
10.24.11 - Malmo, Sweden - Debaser
10.25.11 - Bremen, Germany - Kulturzentrum Lagerhaus
10.26.11 - Haarlem, Netherlands - Patronaat
10.27.11 - Esch-sur-Alzette, Luxembourg - Kulturfabrik
10.28.11 - Schorndorf, Germany - Manufaktur
10.29.11 - Cologne, Germany - Gebäude 9 (Onkel’s Minifestival)
10.30.11 - Kortrijk, Belgium - De Kreun (Sonic City Festival curated by Liars)
10.31.11 - Paris, France - Glazart
11.01.11 - Birmingham, UK - HMV Institute
11.02.11 - Leeds, UK - Brudenell Social Club
11.03.11 - London, UK - Camden Electric Ballroom
11.04.11 - Bristol, UK - The Thekla

• The Melvins:

Morrissey plots tour, considers banning non-vegans, fansite owners, and offensive sausages

Morrissey, beloved shit-starter that he is, will kick off a host of US tourdates on November 10. The 52-year-old hater of his own fansites will, at press time, allow both vegans and carnivores to attend the live shows, but don’t be surprised if he likens meat-eating to Norwegian terrorism or blocks the venue from serving meaty munchies. In fact, just to be on the safe side, perhaps you carnivorous folk should stay away from meat for a full week prior to attending the Moz show. You don’t want to risk his ultra-sensitive nose detecting the slightest hint of your greasy burger breath, and the public humiliation that will surely follow, do you?

The singer is touring in support of a new album, and aside from sharing “Action Is My Middle Name”, further pertinent details, such as a title, release date, and label, are yet to be revealed.


11.10.11 - Chicago, IL - Congress Theater
11.14.11 - San Antonio, TX - Majestic Theater
11.15.11 - Austin, TX - Bass Hall
11.17.11 - Dallas, TX - McFarlin Memorial Auditorium
11.19.11 - Santa Fe, NM - Santa Fe Center
11.20.11 - Phoenix, AZ - Orpheum Theater
11.22.11 - Escondido, CA - Center for the Arts
11.25.11 - Los Vegas, NV - The Cosmopolitan
11.26.11 - Los Angeles, CA - Shrine Auditorium
11.28.11 - Pomona, CA - Fox Theater
12.01.11 - Oakland, CA - Fox Theater
12.05.11 - Monterrey, Mexico - Arena
12.07.11 - Mexico City, Mexico - Plaza Condesa
12.08.11 - Mexico City, Mexico - Plaza Condesa
12.10.11 - Puebla, Mexico - Siglo XX1
12.12.11 - Guadalajara, Mexico - Diana
12.13.11 - Guadalajara, Mexico - Diana

• Morrissey:

The Pirate Bay offshoot debuts, changing the way we experience everything

Hate Dropbox? Rapidshare? Megaupload? Any or all of the other existing sites that allow you to upload your (legally acquired, of course) files and share them with others? Well, today is your lucky day.

Two of the three Swedes who brought you The Pirate Bay way back in 2003 are back with something totally new and different! Peter Sunde and Fredrik Neij have launched to the excitement of the internet masses! Just like all of the other sites mentioned in the first paragraph (and many, many more) you can now upload a file to a site that will generate a link to said file that you can then manually share with whomever you choose.

Unlike Sunde and Neij’s original venture, they’re on the side of the law this time, clearly stating in their terms of service that no copyright-infringing material is allowed to be uploaded and that if a user is caught doing so, the “officers” of the Digital Millennium Copyright Act (DCMA) will shut your shit down. I’m picturing them as some kind of Tron/RoboCop hybrid.

Given that the site is filling an otherwise empty niche, it should be a money-making bonanza. If you can’t handle the free service that allows uploads of files up to 250MB at a time without registration, go ahead and attach your personal information to your uploads for no charge and double up! Or, if 500MB isn’t enough for you, fork over your info and your hard-earned cash for up to 5GB uploads. What a steal.

And unlike the myriad cloud services currently in vogue (Amazon, Google, etc.), Bayfiles doesn’t allow you to search other users’ legally uploaded content (recently found to be not in violation of any copyrights unless copyright owners directly complain) or manage your uploads and found sounds in any discernible way.

A truly groundbreaking day.

• Bayfiles:

Wilco announce second leg of US tour in a soft, raspy voice

After announcing their new LP The Whole Love and kicking off a two-month tour, Wilco managed to break even and afford another tank of gas. Thus, they’ve added a second leg of shows to their schedule. 44-year-young Jeff Tweedy (who just recently had one of those depressing birthdays with the fire-hazard cake and all) and his fellow bandmates will be returning to the debt-trodden black despair of The States in November to ensure that the Midwest gets its share of alt-country too.

The Whole Love is set to be released on September 27 (through their own dBpm label) at a Walmart near you. Listen to first single “I Might” over at the Chocolate Grinder.

New Dates:

11.29.11 - Dallas, TX - The Music Hall at Fair Park
12.01.11 - Austin, TX - Austin City Limits Live at The Moody Theater
12.03.11 - Kansas City, MO - The Uptown Theater
12.04.11 - W. Des Moines, IA - Val Air Ballroom
12.06.11 - Minneapolis, MN - The State Theatre
12.07.11 - Minneapolis, MN - The State Theatre
12.09.11 - Milwaukee, WI - The Riverside Theater
12.10.11 - Detroit, MI - The Fillmore Detroit
12.12.11 - Chicago, IL - Civic Opera House

• Wilco:
• dBpm:

‘Dubstep’ and ‘Grime’ recognized as real words by the Chambers Dictionary; see, I totally deserved that triple word score!

In contrast with their snooty cousins over at the Oxford University Press (who also have ‘dubstep’ and the music variation of the word ‘grime’ defined in their dictionary), the prestigious (?) Chambers Dictionary is something like a more carefully monitored Urban Dictionary, but with a slightly smaller number of hooligans running the show. In their new edition of the dictionary, Chambers defines ‘dubstep’ as a “type of electronic popular dance music developed from drum and bass,” and ‘grime’ as a “style of popular music combining elements of dancehall and hip-hop.” If you ask me, both of these definitions are woefully vague and unspecific.

For comparison’s sake, let’s take a look at an Urban Dictionary definition of ‘dubstep’, selected entirely non-randomly. User carsoncb articulately characterizes the genre, with the passion it deserves, as “the music that is created from transformers having sex.” Oh, of course! That dubstep! Point, Urban Dictionary.

Other words included among the 200 new additions to the Chambers Dictionary are: ‘boyband,’ defined as “a pop group, targeting mainly the teenage market, composed of young males chosen because they look good and can dance and sometimes even sing,” and ‘beatboxing,’ described as the imitation of “an electronic drum machine using the voice.” Well, how about that? ‘Beatboxing’ finally made the cut. Pardon me while I imagine the staff at Chambers carefully navigating this newfangled internet thing, wondering what us young rapscallions are up to these days.

• Chambers:

Relive the magic of the Jesus Lizard reunion in your very own home, thanks to this new Jesus Lizard double LP

So. You missed seeing The Jesus Lizard during one of their storied reunion shows in 2009. Or maybe you were there, and now your life is just a sad, meaningless husk, and you spend your days idly counting the months that have passed since you last saw The Jesus Lizard explode in a mess of sweat and fury on the stages at Pitchfork or All Tomorrow’s Parties or even at the band’s very first stateside reunion performance at Nashville’s Exit/In. Yes, living in the year 2 ADNJLR Anno Domini Nostri Jesu Lizard Reunion can sometimes be a harsh, difficult proposition. All the magic, the mayhem, the yowling of Yow just… gone.

Until now! Now, it might not be the same as getting kicked in the head by David Yow and friends, but Chunklet’s new double LP release of that very special debut reunion performance in Nashville is pretty damn close. Said LP is the vinyl soundtrack to the recent DVD of said show, also entitled Jesus Lizard: Club, and it’ll be available as a fancy schmancy gatefold LP in a limited edition of 1,000 copies. (A tip to the discerning fan: the first 200 mail orders of Club will arrive on extra special colored vinyl!!!! ) The album hits stores December 6, just in time for you to add it your non-denominational holiday celebration list and have your mom say “The… Jeeeeesus… Lizard?” It’s also perfectly timed for you and all your friends who can’t afford to fly home to make awkward jokes about “Oooh I wonder what THAT present is?? A cat calendar? Ha ha ha oooooooh my God, we need more wine, what do you mean we ran out of wine, ooooooh God is the liquor store open, okay, fine, just open the freakin’ cat calendar and put it on the turntable, I can’t stand all this fake holiday cheer anymore. ALCOHOL.” Yep, just the way the Jesus Lizard would’ve wanted it!

Club tracklisting:

A1. Puss
A2. Seasick
A3. Boilermaker
A4. Gladiator
A5. Destroy Before Reading
A6. Mouthbreather
B1. Blue Shot
B2. Glamorous
B3. Killer McHann
B4. One Evening
B5. Then Comes Dudley
B6. Chrome
C1. Nub
C2. Blockbuster
C3. Monkey Trick
C4. 7 vs 8
D1. Thumbscrews
D2. Fly on the Wall
D3. My Own Urine
D4. Dancing Naked Ladies
D5. Bloody Mary
D6. Wheelchair Epidemic

• The Jesus Lizard:
• Chunklet: