New Soulsavers Album and Tourdates Inspire Lonesome Drifters from Coast to Coast

Now, you kids listen here. I’ve been riding these rails for upwards of 30 years, and I’ll wager I can tell you a thing or two about trampin’. It’s a hard life, but I figure that’s the price a fella’s gotta pay to live free under these wide, open skies. I’ve seen cities change, I’ve seen people come and go. Out here, you gotta think on your feet, ‘cuz you never know where your next meal’s gonna come from. At the same time, you gotta take time to appreciate the good things in life: the epic sunsets, the camaraderie of good friends, the latest Soulsavers album. See, I don’t hold much store by much of the music nowadays. Hip-hop, electronica, arty postrock — none of it really speaks to me as a man born and bred alongside these dusty highways, a man with a keen sense of retribution and redemption.

But that all changed when I heard the Soulsavers had teamed up with Mark Lanegan for their latest outing, It's Not How Far You Fall, It's The Way You Land. Columbia Records released that album yesterday in these fine United States, and ever since I heard the news, I’ve been traveling the old Canadian-Pacific line just to see ‘em in action. The band has come all the way over from England with main Soulsaver Rich Machin accompanied by an eight-piece band, two gospel singers, and Mr. Lanegan himself.

Well, you don’t have to take my word for it, but if this ain’t the tracklisting, then I ain’t a lonesome drifter!

TMT Exclusive: French Band “Les Gaffes” Cover Dirty Projectors; D Proj Tour Europe

PARIS – Outside a closed café in the alleys of Montmarte stands Jacques ‘Johnny’ Gaffe, lead singer of French punk legends Les Gaffes. At six-and-a-half feet, Johnny casts a foreboding shadow on the cobblestone street in a turtleneck and a pair of oversized dime-store sunglasses. In between sips of Turkish coffee, he tells me about the band’s latest project: an attempt to recreate Dirty Projector’s Rise Above (TMT Review) from memory in Les Gaffes’s own unique style.

“Yes, ziz is our favorite song to do. Zo we decided to make a... how you say... cover song,” he says with palpable indifference. “I have zeen the album cover in a garbage can while I was pizzing in ze street one day, and zat is all ze research I have done. The rest iz from memory.”

“Ve are wrestling ze essential French... ehh... punkrockness from zis American album.”

The origin of Les Gaffes is, as much of French history and culture, shrouded in mystery. But with the upcoming release, there seems to be big things in the future for Les Gaffes.

“I don’t know if we vill ever go to America. Ze wine and cheese is shit I hear. Ziz is important for ze punk rock.”

TMT Exclusive: Les Gaffes - "Histoire de Police" (a reimagining of The Dirty Projectors' "Police Story")

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Dirty Projectors tourdates:

Travels to Self-Release Debut Album But Will Continue to Seek Sponsorship Deal from L’Oréal (Because They’re Worth It!)

Don’t let the big words and sophisticated air phase you: supermarket tabloid writing is not as difficult as people make it seem. It’s simpleton work... trust us, we’re more gutter than The National Enquirer, The Weekly World News, and People combined. Here is how we stir and spin the pot:

Take a subject, one who has already oversaturated the market like Britney (ALWAYS kick them while they’re down), less high-profile celebs like Meg White (we liked the potential of your alleged sex-tape a few weeks ago, even if it turned out to be someone else), and/or a forgotten B-lister completely off the map (the old and the bad, or those who can be made to look old or bad, are good targets). An affair is good. An STD can add a nice touch of class. A “source” is essential, but preferably one who is untraceable or entirely fictional. The basic rule is there are no rules except the presence of mandatory exclamation marks at the end of every sentence. Just grab someone who is famous, infamous, someone whose 15 minutes o’ fame are just about done, someone who cannot be bothered to care if their life is being ruined by a “journalist,” someone that doesn’t even exist, etc. and put them together in any way, shape, or form you desire. E.g.:

I had a three-way with Meg White and Betty White!

I had a four-way with Britney, Sanjaya, and Pinhead from Hellraiser!

Britney: “Pinhead from Hellraiser gave me the crabs!”

Betty White Death Watch! Former lover, Pinhead from Hellraiser, devastated!

When we are lucky, it takes even less time and effort than these pitiful but passable efforts above. We grudgingly report true news from time to time too when it falls onto our laps. Take this: Travels, Anar Badalov (Metal Hearts) and Mona Elliott (Victory at Sea) will independently release their superb self-titled debut album October 30. Travels contains 10 tales of perceptive pop, detailing life in all its seriousness, sadness, hope, and triumph. You can order the album and check out a couple of songs that stink of intelligence and originality here. There, no truth-bending and no shadow sources equals no lawsuits. I didn’t need to drum up excitement with exclamation marks for this one; the news did all the work by itself. Actually, it is a nice change writing pure and honest news stori... wait, did I just hear someone say something about J. Lo, Jar Jar Binks, corn cob holders, and a hot tub? Gotta go...

Travels, without my aunt:

1. Golden Sun
2. The Smell of Kerosene
3. Sixty Five and Sunny
4. People Sleep
5. Isabelle
6. There Is Movement
7. Love I Could Not Afford
8. Friends in Quotes
9. Hearts Racing
10. Olivia Hurt (Desolation in My Heart)

Flaming Lips Add FIFTH Disc to Zaireeka, 10th Anniversary Celebration!!

Wayne Coyne of The Flaming Lips has a special announcement to make! Please hold your cursor over him to see what he has to say and what he insisted on showing you.

For more info on the Zaireeka parties, go to The Flaming Lips' MySpace page.

Hot Chip’s Forthcoming Album Inspires Me To Write Several Haikus

JKLOL

(If you really feel the need

Read Pitchfork's review)

Back to the story...

Hot Chip have a new record

Called Made In the Dark

Tracks inspired by

Their energetic live shows

Comprise the album

The record will be

Released on DFA next

February 5

Haikus sure are fun

Let's hear it for creative

Sentence structuring!

Fiery Furnaces Tour UK In Search of Widow City, This Story Is Not About Franz Ferdinand

A short, One-Act play entitled: "How Alex Kapranos Accidentally Cock-Blocked Himself; A Cautionary Tale."

Scene: A Basement billiard room in the Franz Ferdinand Glasgow mansion

Alex Kapranos (timidly): Guys, I think I'm ready to ask Eleanor out, finally.

Rest of Franz Ferdinand (spitting out beer and dropping pool cues): Eleanor Freidburger!? Are you daft, man?? She lives in Brooklyn, and we're way over 'ere in Glasgow. It'd never work, mate. Not to mention that weirdo brother of hers! That bloke’s a few sheep shy of a herd, after all! Have you heard the new Fiery Furnaces record?

Alex (chalking his pool cue nervously): I know, i know, but I think maybe I can win the old girl over anyway. I just need a... a good opening line! You know, to sweep her off her feet! Her brother’ll never have to know.

The Franz (sarcastically): yeah... well, you work on that, Alex. See ya...

The band exits. Alex takes another swig of the beer bottle he'd been nursing, sits down on a nearby La-Z-Boy, and sighs heavily

Alex (now alone): Okay. Think Alex, think! Just one or two good lines... By Jove! I've got it. Where's the bloody telephone??? Ah, here it is!

Alex leaps up and reaches for his antique, rotary Mickey Mouse telephone and slowly dials the long-distance number

riiiiiiiiiing....... riiiiiiiiiiing.......

Eleanor Freidburger (sleepy): Hello?

(Alex clears throat)

Alex Kapranos (with feeling): “Eleanor, put those boots back on.

Kick the heels into the Brooklyn dirt.

I know it isn't dignified to run,

But if you run,

You can run to the Coney Island roller coaster.

Ride to the highest point and leap across the filthy water;

Leap until the Gulf Stream's brought you down...”

(silence)

Alex: Eleanor?? Well, what do you say... Oh, nevermind. You're probably just too busy anyway...

Eleanor Freidburger: No, no, Alex! Wait. Actually, that sounds great! I'll be there in November with the band, right after the release of our fifth Fiery Furnaces LP Widow City (TMT Review) via Thrill Jockey! Oh, Alex, I'm so happy! I can't wait to see you! Isn’t that convenient???

(more silence)

Eleanor: Alex? What's wrong, sweetheart??

Alex: Wait... you're not going to bring Matthew with you, are you???

THE END

Upcoming UK Dates (much to the chagrin of Alex Kapranos):

  

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