New York Senator Proposes Bill Banning Both iPods From Crosswalks And Children From His Front Lawn

Carl "Crotchety Ol' Codger" Kruger, who lives in that mysterious house down by the water retention pond and lets the grass grow tall enough to cover his solid-steel front door, is known around town for a variety of reasons. Not only for the time he called the cops on trick-or-treaters three years in a row, nor merely for the time he is rumored to have stood completely naked in his garage, alternately weeping and growling until the neighbors clothed him and coaxed him to his bedroom. He is also esteemed among acquaintances for his key role in American politics as an influential New York state senator.

Senator Kruger deals with masses of people on a daily basis from all walks of life, trying to internalize the myriad needs of his community while staying true to his personal moral compass. That is why Kruger has decided to propose a bill that would ban the use of iPods and cellphones while crossing traffic. The fine would be a tidy amount of $100, which, in relevant cases, would be in addition to fines for jaywalking. Perhaps you thought jaywalking fines were a myth, but you would be wrong. The deadly kind of wrong.

"We're talking about people walking sort of tuned in and in the process of being tuned in, tuned out," Kruger told WCBS-TV in a Joycean spew of language brought to its final breath. "Tuned out to the world around them. They're walking into speeding cars. They're walking into buses. They're walking into one another," he went on, WCBS reporters horrified and looking desperately at one other. "Tuned in to the music, tuned out to the real world, know what I'm saying Janet? I'm talking about a group of slithery snakes just slithering their way along the roads and into the roads, of the roads, looking for a quick fix, see what I'm saying here, I'm saying a little something about a quick fix, that's the sort of thing I'm talking around, up, down, sideways, and ass-backwards is the kind of world we live in today people, do I hear a stir, I said do I hear a stir in the heavens, going once going twice, sold to the highest bidder, oh take me home Lord God on high." Kruger then thanked the reporters for their time, found a nickel behind his own ear, and baptized the man holding the boom mic.

If passed, the fine will apply only to Buffalo and New York City, because the people getting hit by buses in Albany, frankly, deserve it.

Hot on the heels of an apparent collaboration on Björk's collaboration-crazy upcoming record, Konono N°1, the artists behind 2004's excessively brilliant afro-pop record Congotronics (TMT Review), are out on the road, circulating the U.S. for a smattering of concert appearances. And if that wasn't a long enough and difficult sentence for you, then get a load of this adjective-laced ridiculousness called a sentence that doesn't have any purpose whatsoever!

The group, who hail from Kinshasa in the Democratic Republic of the Congo (that's in Africa, geography fans), have been making music with their salvaged instruments (constructed mostly from materials found in junkyards) since at least 1978. Their track "Mungua-Muanga" was recorded back in 1978 and appeared on a compilation called Zaire: Musiques Urbaines a Kinshasa in 1987. The afrobeat collective most recently played their masikilu music on the Congotronics 2 compilation.

It should also be noted they are playing the Coachella festival on the same day as Björk, as well as playing the Reykjavik Arts Festival (at which Björk has appeared in the past.) Does this mean that we will get to see a live collaboration, perhaps?

TIM BUCKLEY Tim Buckley “My Fleeting House” My Fleeting House | MVD Visual TMT News Story

The following is my favorite press release of the year (so far), edited for bias and to fit the TMT format.

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE:

TIM BUCKLEY

My Fleeting House My Fleeting House

Available on DVD

April 24, 2007 May 15, 2007

Through MVD Visual

My Fleeting House My Fleeting House is the first-ever DVD collection of performances of Tim Buckley. This essential DVD features rare live performances from various television TV shows and interview footage spanning his entire career.

The DVD has eleven 11 full-length songs, and three partial performances. This DVD also features insightful interviews with Larry Beckett (co-writer of many songs with Buckley), Lee Underwood (Buckley's guitarist), and David Browne (author of "Dream Brother: The Lives of Jeff and Tim Buckley" Dream Brother: The Lives of Jeff and Tim Buckley).

The footage spans his entire career, from 1967 to 1974, and includes unreleased video of interaction with Buckley on The Steve Allen Show The Steve Allen Show (1969) and on WITF's The Show The Show (1970). The footage is taken from various television TV programs from 1967 to 1974 right up to the time of his death in 1975. All but two of the musical clips are unreleased. As an additional oddity The clip of Buckley being interviewed on The Steve Allen Show The Steve Allen Show includes Jayne Meadows complimenting Buckley on his hair.

Despite having produced nine studio albums, three live albums, and many “best of” compilations, My Fleeting House My Fleeting House is the first-ever authorized collection of Buckley’s visual performances. Several segments on this new collection have not been seen for over thirty 30 years. MVD Visual has secured the best possible, first-generation video sources for the compilation, including footage from American, British, and Dutch television, and also a forgotten feature film. This DVD has the full approval of the Estate of Tim Buckley.

Buckley was an experimental a vocalist and performer who incorporated jazz, psychedelia, funk, soul, and avant-garde rock in a short career spanning the late 1960s and early 1970s. He often regarded his voice as an instrument, a talent most exploited he used on his albums Goodbye and Hello, Lora, Goodbye and Hello, Lorca, and Starsailor Starsailor. He was the father of musician and singer Jeff Buckley, also known for his three-and-a-half octave voice, who died in 1997. Buckley released his debut album Tim Buckley Tim Buckley on Elektra in 1966. A folk-rock album, it contained psychedelic melodies written with input from Beckett. He went on to release Goodbye and Hello (1967), Happy Sad (1969), Blue Afternoon (1969), Lorca (1970), Starsailor (1970), Greetings from L.A. (1972), Sefronia (1973), and Look at the Fool (1974).

Born in Washington DC, Tim Buckley lived for 10 years in New York before moving to southern California. During his childhood, he was a fan of Johnny Cash, Hank Williams, Nat King Cole, and Miles Davis,} although country music was his foremost passion. He left school at 18 with twenty songs written with Larry Beckett under his belt — many of which later featured on his debut album. Mothers of Invention drummer Jimmy Carl Black introduced Buckley to Herb Cohen, and he quickly got him signed to Elektra record company. He also met guitarist Lee Underwood around this time, who became a big part of nearly all of Buckley's artistic endeavors.

On June 28, 1975 after returning from the last show of a tour in Dallas, Buckley snorted heroin at a friend's house. Having diligently controlled his habit while on the road, his tolerance was lowered, and the combination of a small amount of drugs mixed with the amount of alcohol he'd been consuming all day to celebrate the tour's end was too much. His friend took him home thinking he was merely drunk. He was put to bed by his friends, who told his wife that he'd also used some barbiturates. As she watched TV in bed beside him, Buckley turned blue. Attempts by friends and paramedics to revive him were unsuccessful. Reportedly, Buckley's last words were "Bye Bye Baby," delivered in a way reminiscent of the line in Ray Charles' "Driftin' Blues." Buckley was just 28 years of age. (Boring.)

Arranged in chronological order, My Fleeting House My Fleeting House traces the evolution of Buckley’s music, voice, songwriting, and backup bands.

DVD extras include a 12-page booklet of unreleased Buckley photos, an album-by-album review by Underwood, Beckett, and Browne, and Beckett (also a poet) reciting “Song to the Siren.” My dick is hard.

Tracklist:

!!! Plans Intimate, Three Night U.K. Tour; Just Keeps Adding Dates

Hey guys, down here. I was too exhausted after formatting all these tourdates to scroll back up to the top and write an intro. My vision was blurring and my feelings toward !!! were weakening, but through it all, I knew it would be worth it just to see the smile on that 13-year-old Dane when he finds out that, yes, his love interest's favorite band is not only providing a new album, Myth Takes, but is even coming to the esteemed Voxhall Theatre, now giving him a legitimate excuse to ask her out on the date of all dates. Oh, how the whole town of Aarhus will be healed by their love! Or at least up-in-arms over Nic Offer's hip thrusts.

Daughters Tour, and If You Think They’re Gay it Says More About You Than it Does Them

I interviewed Lex from Daughters once. He wouldn’t give me his last name at the time, but it’s Marshall. He wouldn’t tell me his last name ’cause he’s a liar. A GODDAMNED LIAR. Er, wait, he’s not a liar per se, he’s just sick of all the harassment from Spin and Rolling Stone, always asking him to be on the cover of their respective magazine, always on his balls about some Fan-tabulous pictorial or some photo op with the kids from Real World Santiago or that bitch from Garden State. You know, that darth vader chick. Lex, which is short for Alexis, HATES that shit, and he spreads his buttcheeks for NO ONE.

He also loves microphones. I saw him live once and he deep-throated his mic like Jenna J taking down a floppy dinosaur cock. Early the next week an associate said the show was “too gay,” referring to this and other stunts, but I tend to disagree. If we want our frontment of today to truly blow our minds, pun intended, they need to have the freedom to suck, shuck, jerk, milk, fondle, stroke, slurp, gargle, and flat-out KNOB the mic all they want. Well, except for the gurgling, that’d be pretty tough to do unless you got one of ‘dem new Shure mics. Those things melt in your mouth, not your hand and are better than Liquid Paper!

But back to biznass: While Alexis shields his face from the cameras and avoids the titties of teenyboppers and smitten reviewers, his heavy-as-metal band Daughters will be on tour with the likes of Chinese Stars, Pelican, Russian Circles, The Locust, and Cattle Decapitation, the latter of whom will be passing out ‘Axe Grant’ leaflets due to my news article last week about pushy vegetarians. Well, they would be if they gave a shit, anyway... they never return my letters!

Ask Lex Diamonds his REAL last name at the following tourdates:

You Put Your Dancing Xius On and I’ll Bring My Casiotone. It’s Tourin’ Time!

O, Casiotone For The Painfully Alone! How I once laughed at your band
name and assumed that you were some emo wuss unworthy of my
hard-hearted attentions!

That all changed one day in college, when I heard your song "I Have
Mice" and realized your life and mine were inextricably intertwined. Truly, we are fellow travelers in this world of scummy kitchens and renegade rodents.

As I lay awake in my crumbling, infested Baltimore rowhouse, I took
solace in your song, heartily identifying with those wrenching
lyrics: "Sometimes at night I watch the mice across the kitchen floor/
I used to think that they came from the fireplace/ But they come in
under the pantry door/ They get so close I could touch them all."

Amen, man. A-FUCKING-MEN. We used to think that they came in from
the pantry, but they came in from behind the oven.

Slowly, all of my roommates grew obsessed with the song. One of us
went so far as to make a mouse's eye view music video for the
song and turn it in for a film class. I should mention that I really
wanted to include that video in this article, but the auteur has
decided that it's not up to his high standards of excellence and will
not allow me to post it. He got what the kids called "a gentleman's
C" in that class. I'm sure Casiotone himself, reportedly a film-school dropout, would understand.

These days, I'm more into "Don't They Have Payphones Wherever You Were Last Night" (can I get another AMEN????) from 2006's Etiquette (Tomlab), but "We Have Mice" earned Mr. Casiotone a permanent place in my heart.

I would tell you all about how I also identify with certain songs by
tour headliners Xiu Xiu (who will continue to play shows after the Casiotone stint), but I'm afraid that would scare the shit out of you.

I used to think that they were touring in Europe, but they're actually
touring in the United States:

News

  • Recent
  • Popular


TMT IS SEEKING NEWS WRITERS

Click here to apply