Nine Inch Nails Finally Use All Those Spikes to Build a Railroad, Tour North America On It This Fall

The GOOD NEWS?

Your absolutely favorite group ever Nine Inch Nails have announced that they will be extending their 2008 Lights In The Sky Tour and bringing their big ol’ industrial-prog-emo-metal-pop-futurewave-tech-punktronc-whateveritis sound to a whole smattering of U.S. and Canadian dates (yes, this means you, Saskatoon!) this fall.

You are so psyched and ready for this. You’ve already heard that returning member Robin Finck and new addition Justin Meldal-Johnsen will join Trent Reznor, Alessandro Cortini, and Josh Freese as they bull-doze their way across the new world. You can practically feel the bass in your stomach, empathized angst in your throat, and newly minted XXL vintage “NIN: Now I’m Nothing” t-shirt weighing heavily on your sweat-drenched torso.

You’ve done all the research. Being a true fan, you know that Finck has served in numerous touring configurations of NIN, from tours supporting The Downward Spiral (1994-1997) to The Fragile (2000-2001). You’re vaguely aware that he recently played for Guns N' Roses, even though that’s more of a thing your step-dad is into, and you remember that Meldal-Johnsen previously performed with Beck (a.k.a., “that pussy, Beck”) for more than a decade and was a founding member of Ima Robot.

So in short, you’re totally psyched. You’re anticipating that the upcoming tour will feature the live debut of material from the recently released Ghosts I-IV (TMT Review) and The Slip alongside other songs that span the entire NIN catalog. And you’re overwhelmed with excitement because you love all of those songs. Reznor sings about what you feel, and lately, you’ve been feeling fucked up about some shit! This tour’s show in your town is going to kick some royal ass. It’s going to make up for all of that bullshit that’s been heaped upon you by your friends, your family, your partners, and “the man,” and you cannot WAIT to go...

THE BAD NEWS:

You’re in high school, the school year just started, and you’re Religion 401 syllabus says that you’ve got a rough draft due the morning after. Fuck. You can’t go.

All Aboard the NIN Continental Express:

New Study Suggests Listening to Music Helps Develop Musical Competence; “Music is Fun” Say Some Scientists

I know that watching MythBusters every week makes science seem "cool," "interesting," and "important," but trust me when I tell you that not everyone in a white coat gets to spend their days testing whacky hypotheses via the demolition of walls and construction of shark robots. Fact is, sometimes these guys just get bored out of their minds and start testing any old arbitrary thing just to earn that paycheck for the week and keep the grants flowing! Take these cats over at the University of Amsterdam. As if the world didn't take Amsterdam non-seriously enough, these researchers have taken the time to carefully prove that, surprise, surprise, the act of listening to music makes you better at playing it yourself. Here we all were thinking that listening to something aural in order to imitate it better was a pretty logical and non-scientific principle. But apparently, it's headline-grabbing science. Thanks for logging in those hours, Amsterdam! Who says you're not a focused bunch?

But to be fair, things do take a turn for the slightly more scientific when you explain them with fancier words. For example, "more and more labs are showing that people have the sensitivity for skills that we thought were only expert skills," explained Henkjan Honing, a researcher behind the study. Sounds intriguing, right? "The UvA-study shows that listeners without formal musical training, but with sufficient exposure to a certain musical idiom... perform similarly in a musical task when compared to formally trained listeners."

The conclusion? Drum roll please... Listening to music helps one understand how it is made! In other words, all those Baby's First Mozart CDs have finally been justified. Uh, but only if you want them to play classical music, apparently, because the study also showed that subjects showed more competence creating music in genres with which they were familiar.

But $5 Walmart Mozart CD or no $5 Walmart Mozart CD, you're not going to want to stop forcing your kid to keep taking piano lessons just yet. After all, you don't need a study to tell you that learning how to do something professionally helps you to do it better... or, wait... maybe you do? Someone had better do a study on that too... if they're not too busy, that is.

New Study Suggests Listening to Music Helps Develop Musical Competence; “Music is Fun” Say Some Scientists

I know that watching MythBusters every week makes science seem "cool," "interesting," and "important," but trust me when I tell you that not everyone in a white coat gets to spend their days testing whacky hypotheses via the demolition of walls and construction of shark robots. Fact is, sometimes these guys just get bored out of their minds and start testing any old arbitrary thing just to earn that paycheck for the week and keep the grants flowing! Take these cats over at the University of Amsterdam. As if the world didn't take Amsterdam non-seriously enough, these researchers have taken the time to carefully prove that, surprise, surprise, the act of listening to music makes you better at playing it yourself. Here we all were thinking that listening to something aural in order to imitate it better was a pretty logical and non-scientific principle. But apparently, it's headline-grabbing science. Thanks for logging in those hours, Amsterdam! Who says you're not a focused bunch?

But to be fair, things do take a turn for the slightly more scientific when you explain them with fancier words. For example, "more and more labs are showing that people have the sensitivity for skills that we thought were only expert skills," explained Henkjan Honing, a researcher behind the study. Sounds intriguing, right? "The UvA-study shows that listeners without formal musical training, but with sufficient exposure to a certain musical idiom... perform similarly in a musical task when compared to formally trained listeners."

The conclusion? Drum roll please... Listening to music helps one understand how it is made! In other words, all those Baby's First Mozart CDs have finally been justified. Uh, but only if you want them to play classical music, apparently, because the study also showed that subjects showed more competence creating music in genres with which they were familiar.

But $5 Walmart Mozart CD or no $5 Walmart Mozart CD, you're not going to want to stop forcing your kid to keep taking piano lessons just yet. After all, you don't need a study to tell you that learning how to do something professionally helps you to do it better... or, wait... maybe you do? Someone had better do a study on that too... if they're not too busy, that is.

Craz-E Cohen’s Warner Music Group Summer Stock-A-Rama Sale, This Monday Only! Don’t miss out!

What do you buy the millionaire record company exec who already has everything this holiday season? Well how about Warner Music Group's American chairman and chief executive Lyor Cohen's former stock shares? With Mr. Cohen selling 23% of his stock in WMG, there are plenty of lovable stock options to choose from! 80,000 cuddly options, to be exact -- each going for $8.45 a share, equaling approximately $6.8 million total.

Cohen, the man behind Green Day and The Red Hot Chili Peppers, renewed his contract earlier this spring and will be earning something in the ballpark of $3 million a year, with potential bonus opportunities up to $5 million, until his contract comes again in 2013. His new contract also gives him 1.5 million mooooore stock options, in addition to the 2.6 million he decided to keep from this Monday's sale. Seemingly confident in WMG's progress, he stated that "this sale reflects nothing more than a normal need for liquid assets for personal expenses, as well as my financial adviser's recommendation that I diversify my portfolio for tax and estate planning." He also added that your credit score doesn't matter, as long as you have a job and $99 down -- THESE STOCKS MUST GO!

Warner shares were at an all-time low this January, but have improved by nearly 80% at this date. Concerns about company welfare seem to be easing up.

Toby Keith a Democrat? You Decide.

Support from the arts is nothing new in presidential campaigns. Many artists have vocalized their support for (or disapproval of) a variety of electoral candidates, such as Rage Against the Machine for Nader, Wilco for Obama, and Lawrence Welk for McCain. Earlier this week, though, Mr. Obama received a tip of the hat from an unlikely source in Nashville: Toby Keith! His last major political statement? “We’ll put a boot in your ass. It’s the American Way.”

As quoted by Ryan Pearson of the AP, in response to a question about patriotism and its role in the current Presidential election, Mr. Red, White, and Blue stated: “There's a big part of America that really believes that there is a war on terrorism, and that we need to finish up.”

Keith went on to elaborate: "So I thought it was beautiful the other day when Obama went to Afghanistan and got educated about Afghanistan and Iraq. He came back and said some really nice things.”

My favorite part of that quote is the “we need to finish up” part. I like the image of people actually thinking we can just roll up our sleeves, put in a couple extra hours, and end this whole terrorism thing with a little American hard work.

Keith ended his statement with the following praise for Obama: “So as far as leadership and patriotism goes, I think it's really important that those things have to take place. And I think he's the best Democratic candidate we've had since Bill Clinton. And that's coming from a Democrat."

Toby Keith a Democrat, whoda thunk it?

Frisco Freakout Lineup Announced – Anybody want some LSD? I just need a place to cook!

In what is sure to be an experience likely to be described as “a slowly melting landscape” or “growing ever more illuminated as we traveled the note-breeze,” San Francisco's Frisco Freakout (SF3), an all-day psychedelic dance party, is on for October 11, 2008. Showcasing some of the best that the super-psych-state of California has to offer in psychedelic rock, the first-annual, one-day festival has announced its lineup and a general bevy of other pertinent information for all those interested in buying the ticket and taking the ride.

The lineup:

The whole shindig is going down at Thee Parkside in San Fran, costs a reasonable amount, and is promised to include “good trips” and “organic eats.” Oh, and hey, it’s all-ages, so make sure to bring your kids and get them started on the path of enlightenment; just keep them away from the brown acid.

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