Older Woman Wrongly Accused of Downloading Movies, Gets Dropped by ISP

Older Woman Wrongly Accused of Downloading Movies, Gets Dropped by ISP http://www.tinymixtapes.com/sites/default/files/news-10-02-qwest.jpg

So it’s come to this, has it? Apparently, the industry’s eyes are so glazed over with paranoia that they’ve started issuing warrants for little old ladies to get dropkicked in the ass by their ISPs. 53-year old Cathi Paradiso reportedly had her internet suspended by Qwest Communications after they assumed she’d been downloading illegal material, including ZombieLand, Harry Potter, and South Park. Now, ladies and gentleman of the jury, I ask you this: do these television programs and/or movies sound anything like what a 53-year-old woman would download? Would a 53-year-old woman even know how to download a movie? Maybe, but these film and TV titles do sound like 13-year-old boy fare. COME ON NOW! Doesn’t it seem the least bit possible that little boys (or sad-sack man-boys) were stealing internet juice from the older, unassuming lady? Not that all old ladies are unassuming — many are impeccably tech-savvy — but you get what I’m saying. It seems pretty unlikely.

After being dropped abruptly from her ISP with a stern slap on the wrist, Paradiso alerted the media, hoping this would help locate the true culprits. And true enough, some interference from CNET prompted a technician to have a closer look at Paradiso’s network. Indeed, they determined that Paradiso’s network had been “compromised” by another (and probably way less mature) party.

Case closed. Next week on Dragnet, Sgt. Joe Friday, and Sgt. Ben Romero take on the case of the missing B Channel…

Sir Richard Bishop Goes on Tour, Possibly Incinerates Audience Because He Is a Dragon

In 2007, I saw former Sun City Girls guitarist Sir Richard Bishop open for Animal Collective. During the show, he told the audience that he was over 500 years old. There is only one explanation for this fact: Sir Richard Bishop is a dragon. Sir Richard Bishop is going on tour this winter. If you don’t want to go, it means you don’t want to go see a dragon, and, let’s be honest, that is stupid. Also, Bill Callahan is playing some of the dates and, while he is not a dragon, he is pretty damn good.

02.05.10 - Paradiso - Amsterdam, Netherlands
02.06.10 - Bad Bonn - Dudingen, Switzerland
02.07.10 - Caves du Manoir - Martigny, Switzerland
02.09.10 - Usine - Geneva, Switzerland
02.10.10 - Le Grande Mix - Tourcoing, France *
02.11.10 - Olympic Club - Nantes, France *
02.12.10 - Cafe de la Danse - Paris, France *
02.14.10 - Arkaoda - Istanbul, Turkey
02.16.10 - OK - Linz, Austria
02.17.10 - Club Schocken - Stuttgart, Germany
02.18.10 - West Germany - Berlin, Germany
02.19.10 - Scheld’apen - Antwerp, Belgium
02.20.10 - Freebutt - Brighton, United Kingdom
02.21.10 - The Portland Arms - Cambridge, United Kingdom
02.22.10 - The Church - Cardiff, United Kingdom
02.24.10 - Stereo - Glasgow, United Kingdom
02.25.10 - Cluny - Newcastle, United Kingdom
02.26.10 - Whitechapel Gallery - London, United Kingdom
02.27.10 - The Croft - Bristol, United Kingdom
02.28.10 - Miss Peapods - Falmouth, United Kingdom
03.01.10 - Uncut Club - London, United Kingdom
03.03.10 - Museu do Chiado - Lisbon, Portugal

* Bill Callahan

• Sir Richard Bishop: http://www.sirrichardbishop.net
• Drag City: http://www.dragcity.com

Windish Agency Opens Branch in NYC, My Heart

The Windish Agency is a really cool indie artist representation group that I wish would give me a job. (If you or someone you know works for Windish, why not, say, just forward them this article? In the body of your email, you can also add that I am a hard worker with an impressive skill set that involves finding the funniest animals on the internet, having great hair, and drinking more caffeine than you or your doctor previously thought possible. I am a STEAL, let me tell you.) Windish represents groups like A Place to Bury Strangers, El Perro del Mar, Fever Ray, and GZA. And now they’ve expanded from their original outpost in Chicago and added a location in New York, which is just really fucking awesome because I totally want to live in New York! (Yes, yessssss, you should definitely forward this. Have I mentioned that I am also good at buying drinks and paying people off for favors done in 24K gold Rolexs and a night alone with Paris Hilton? It’s all true.) So congrats Windish on the expansion, and also to you New York, for your music business community is getting just that much more rad with this addition.

• Windish Agency: http://www.windishagency.com

Dirty Projectors to Perform The Getty Address in Full. Yes, IN FULL.

Back in 2005, Dirty Projectors mastermind Dave Longstreth and an earlier DP incarnation cranked out The Getty Address, a sprawling, glitchy, insular, heady concept album filled with processed female choirs, sequenced beats, and orchestra parts that would almost certainly have George Martin rolling around in his grave (trust me, he’s dead), topped off with a pretty po-mo storyline about… well, Don Henley and Sacagawea. Only they aren’t Don Henley and Sacagawia. Get it? Well good. You’re about as in the know as most of us, then.

Anyway, since that record, Dave and co. have conquered a heck of a lot of indie rock territory. So much so, in fact, that they’ve apparently finally got the fanbase, the balls, and (most importantly) the budget to go all-out and resurrect TMT favorite The Getty Address live in its entirety! As a special favor explicitly to us! Maybe. (Maybe?) Uh, yeah, so, on February 19 at New York’s Lincoln Center (already sold out, y’all) and February 27th at Los Angeles’ Walt Disney Concert Hall, Dirty Projectors will present the record in full with 15-piece contemporary music ensemble Alarm Will Sound, conducted by Alan Pierson and in an arrangement by Matt Marks. In addition, they will play a set of material from their TMT smash hit, “We Are the World”… I mean, Bitte Orca (TMT Review) .

The New York show at Lincoln Center is part of the badass American Songbook concert series, and The L.A. show is a co-headlining thing with the L.A. Lakers… I mean, the Los Angeles Philharmonic. During the first half, the Philharmonic will play orchestral pieces that Longstreth has hand-picked(!!!), and then the REAL musicians will take over for the second half and play the REAL high art stuff (a.k.a. the DP album). Finally, a chance to SIT DOWN IN ASSIGNED SEATS at a rock show! Oh, how I’ve been waiting…

• Dirty Projectors: http://www.dirtyprojectors.net
• Western Vinyl: http://westernvinyl.com

[Photo: Neate Photos]

Phosphorescent Tours with David Gray

Phosphorescent is currently supporting David Gray, which prompts the question: However good this is in terms of exposure for Phosphorescent, wouldn’t he be better off writing us another gut-wrenchingly beautiful album? Sorry, I’m selfish like that.

02.05.10 - Luxembourg - Den Atelier
02.07.10 - Zurich, CH - X-tra Limmathaus
02.08.10 - Cologne, GER - Theatre am Tanzbrunnen
02.09.10 - Hamburg, GER - Grosse Freiheit
02.10.10 - Berlin, GER - Huxley’s Neue Welt
03.11.10 - Houston, TX - Verizon Wireless Theatre
03.12.10 - New Orleans, LA - Mahalia Jackson Theatre for the Performing Arts
03.13.10 - Austin, TX - Hogg Memorial Auditorium
03.14.10 - Austin, TX - Hogg Memorial Auditorium
03.16.10 - Grand Prairie, TX - Nokia Theatre Grand Prairie
03.17.10 - Kansas City, MO - Uptown Theatre
03.19.10 - St. Louis, MO - Blanche M. Touhill Performing Arts Center
03.20.10 - Milwaukee, WI - Riverside Theatre
03.21.10 - Cleveland, OH - Playhouse Square at State Theatre
03.23.10 - Cincinnati, OH - Taft Theatre
03.24.10 - Indianapolis, IN - Murat Theatre
03.26.10 - Louisville, KY - Louisville Palace Theatre
03.27.10 - Columbus, OH - Ohio Theatre
03.29.10 - Buffalo, NY - UB Center for the Arts
03.30.10 - Pittsburgh, PA - Benedum Center
03.31.10 - Baltimore, MD - Lyric Opera House
04.01.10 - Montclair, NJ - Wellmont Theatre
04.03.10 - Providence, RI - Providence Performing Arts Center
04.05.10 - Albany, NY - The Egg at Hart Theatre
04.06.10 - Wallingford, CT - Oakdale Theatre
04.07.10 - Portland, ME - Merrill Auditorium at City Hall
04.09.10 - Durham, NC - Durham Performing Arts Center
04.10.10 - Atlanta, GA - Atlanta Civic Center Theatre
04.11.10 - Nashville, TN - Ryman Auditorium
04.13.10 - Clearwater, FL - Ruth Eckerd Hall
04.14.10 - Miami Beach, FL - Fillmore Miami Beach at the Jackie Gleason Theatre
04.15.10 - Orlando, FL - Hard Rock Live

• Phosphorescent: http://www.myspace.com/phosphorescent
• Dead Oceans: http://www.deadoceans.com

Magic Kids Sign to Matador’s True Panther Imprint

Memphis, TN band Magic Kids have signed to (warning: website may induce seizures) True Panther Sounds, the newest addition to the Matador Records family. The ensemble’s debut single “Hey Boy” for Goner Records showcased a hazy, ornate, pop-oriented sound, channeling both Brian Wilson and Phil Spector.

While True Panther will handle the release of Magic Kids’ full-length debut later this year, you can tide yourself over with their split with The Smith Westerns due out on Fat Possum soon.

Read all about it over on Matador’s Matablog.

If that isn’t enough, you can check out Magic Kids on tour with new labelmates Girls and The Smith Westerns. They’ll be at SXSW, too.

02.05.10 - Atlanta, GA - The Earl #
02.06.10 - Nashville, TN - Exit/In #
02.07.10 - St. Louis, MO - The Gargoyle #
02.08.10 - Columbia, MO - The Blue Note #
02.10.10 - Denver, CO - Bluebird Theater #
02.12.10 - Salt Lake City, UT - Urban Lounge #
02.14.10 - San Francisco, CA - Great American Music Hall #
02.16.10 - Los Angeles, CA - The Echo *
02.17.10 - Phoenix, AZ - Trunk Space @
02.19.10 - Norman, OK - Opolis &

# Girls, The Smith Westerns
* Pearl Harbor, Dunes
@ The Young Friends
& JuneBug Spade, La Panther Happens

• Magic Kids: http://www.myspace.com/themagickids
• True Panther: http://www.truepanther.com

  

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