TMT PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT: WAYS TO PISS OF YOUR MOTHER
Hey, there, reader. Bored with life? Tired of the same old routine day-in and day-out?
Well, TMT feels you! And that's why we're offering you this helpful PSA to help you shake things up a little. Follow these examples, and you'll be livin' on the edge again before you know it, just like Keith Richards.
1. When's the last time you've pie-faced someone? Load up a paper-plate with some shaving cream and give your boss a call! It's time you started treating everyone you know like a fraternity pledge.
2. Stop mainlining heroine the "old fashioned way" and be creative. Ball point pen? Turkey baster?? Once again, what would Keith Richards do?
3. Commit Regicide. (yeah, yeah, go ahead, look it up already... sheesh)
4. Sneak into first-class on your next airline flight and call all of the flight attendants "sugar tits" while swilling all available free booze like it's going out of style. There's nothing like puking from 30,000 feet to recharge your batteries!
5. Tell your mom that you're WAY into this band Pissed Jeans now, and that you've decided you won't be going to church anymore.
Let the healing begin: