Source Magazine Chapter 11: Where’s the Beef? (A: Suicide Girls.com LOLZ)

Self-proclaimed “Hip-Hop Bible” The Source has filed for Chapter 11 bankruptcy, with current CEO Jeremy Miller citing the mismanagement of former co-owner Raymond “Benzino” Scott and founder Dave Mays as the main cause. After Eminem and the Benzie beefed (in print and on record!), advertisers and subscribers started dropping, says SOHH.com. Since then, The Source has been struggling to overcome a number of publicity disasters, including a sexual harassment suit by former editor-in-chief Kim Osorio and claims that the magazine boosted the reviews (the “mic” rating) of several not-so-great records.

I don’t know about this rap stuff (if it’s not Clipse or Ghostface, it’s really just not indie enough), but judging from the SOHH's feedback forum, the regulars are torn about Source’s continuing financial troubles. Talk-backer Jaime wonders, “Where is SOHH Magazine”? While forum member Ohhh speculates, “No other mags are going bankrupt so the proof is in the pudding,” begging the question: so what’s the pudding in?

Hannity (????) writes that “[in] 10 years we'll be done with paper periodicals.” But forum user jquifov gwzq gets the final word, saying of the bankruptcy, “uhgsi xehpylamz nztamgb myhea pwsky bmyxtp vnmz.”

So it goes. An old magazine gets restructured. A young website lives. Unlike the beef-happy hip-hop media, the indie scene prefers pork, and we’re more than happy to play ball, shit, even to excess, to get those big money deals. Mr P has yet to challenge indie fashion guru and American Apparel CEO Dov Charney’s to a brawl-to-wall beard-growing match; though rumor has it P, following Charney’s lead, now interviews potential writers in his underwear. The dis record is probably not forthcoming.

Seriously, not only did I have to witness a skivvies-only interview to get this gig, the magic eight ball tells me some poor sucker is going to get strong-armed into giving The Twilight Sad’s new disc four dots instead of three-and-a-half. Do you know how many units that extra half moon will move? If only you, fair reader, were so impressionable. We live and die on the backs of our advertisers, so here it goes: fuck FatCat Records, Crystal Top Music, Token Boy, and whoever else is flickering in your eyeballs today. No amount of half naked men/women will make me click your fucking banner ad (honestly though, at some point I’m going to click it). Sixteen- to thirty-four-year-olds unite. You have nothing to lose but your $72k household income (on average!). Or just get Firefox.

Alright, I’m done snitchin’. Please keep advertising with us.

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