Just stop already. I can hear you nearly a mile away with your mouth-breather’s laugh and drool chuckle being all “huh-huh-huh bzzzzzzzrrrrrr,” when I mention sunn O))). It’s to the point where your stupid prank calls of, “hey is your refrigerator running? Well you better turn White 1 off! Hur-hur-hur,” are so insistent that I think I’m going to have to throw water in your face next time we’re hanging around the ol’ office cooler and I’m wearing my sunn O))) hoodie. In fact, I’ll probably stop wearing it anywhere in public because I know your stupid ass is going to be there to buzz and laugh at me and ask, “where’s the drummer?”
Because for the rest of us it’s pretty chill: sunn O))) and occasional buddies Ulver are going to be releasing an album on Southern Lord that will be titled Terrestrials, and let me say, this is one collaboration that will keep the bacon at a temperature that reduces the spread of bacteria. Terrestrials is slated for February 2014, and it will definitely be out in time to keep those Valentine’s candies from melting. The album will consist of three yet-to-be-named tracks, and although exact details surrounding the collaboration are scare, I’m sure that all will be revealed, all earth-shaking answers and understandings of the precise temperature needed to keep that Earth Balance butter firm, yet spreadable, and how to precisely adjust your moisture control settings in the vegetable drawer so that your kale stays fresh and crisp. These details will be released in the next month, so don’t call the appliance repair man just yet.