Wooden Shjips Tour East Coast

I decided to take a nap before writing this story today, and just as I was drifting off to sleep, I was struck by the most “genius” idea. “Wooden Shjips!” I said to myself. “I’ll write a piece entirely using seafaring words, such as “setting sail for tour” or “Ahoy! The San Francisco psych garage band is embarking on a mighty voyage across the East Coast.” Then I woke up and I realized how stupid the idea was. THANK GOD FOR NAPS RIGHT???

So now here you have it, just a simple story about how awesome this tour will be and about how horribly deficient the right side of my brain is. The cool thing about this tour is that Wooden Shjips are performing new musical arrangements for the 92Y Tribeca’s Halloween weekend screening of the spooooky film The Wicker Man. I will now refrain from any “dad” jokes about it being rated “Arrrrrr.” You’re welcome!
10.24.09 – Baltimore, MD - The Golden West Café*
10.25.09 - Washington, DC - The Red and The Black**
10.26.09 - Philadelphia, PA - Kung Fu Necktie***
10.27.09 - New Haven, CT - Café Nine****
10.28.09 - Northampton, MA - The Elevens
10.29.09 - Somerville, MA - P.A.’s Lounge*****
10.30.09 - New York, NY - Wicker Man Party at 92Y Tribeca******
10.31.09 - New York, NY - 171 Lombardy St********

*The Flying Eyes, Ringo Deathstarr

**Black Whales

***Birds of Maya, Sounds of Kaleidoscope

****The Stoned Ambassadors

*****Sunburned Hand of the Man

****** Effi Briest, Silver Summit

*******Vivian Girls, Crystal Stilts, Religious Knives

Weezy F. Baby, a.k.a Lil Wayne, Pleads Guilty to Gun Charge, Faces Year in Prison, Plans Collaboration With T.I.

Yesterday, in a New York courtroom, Lil Wayne plead guilty to attempted possession of a firearm in the second degree after having previously plead not guilty to charges brought by the NYPD. Tipped by the familiar scent of cannabis sativa, the police searched and found a .40 calibre handgun on Wayne’s tour bus in July 2007. According to Allhiphop.com, Lil Wayne has opted to accept a plea bargain that carries a maximum sentence of one year in the slammer after DNA evidence found on the gun was decided to be admissible, despite Wayne’s lawyer calling the techniques to acquire said evidence “problematic.”

According to the Rolling Stone, Lil Wayne is also facing felony drug possession and handgun charges when police in Arizona searched and allegedly seized 105 grams of marijuana, 29 grams of cocaine, 41 grams of ecstasy, drug paraphernalia, and a handgun. Lil Wayne has yet to comment on the newest charges, only offering up a decidedly cool “What’s up?” to reporters waiting outside the courtroom.

Wayne is set to be sentenced in February, and because of the guilty plea, the status of Weezy’s forthcoming album Rebirth, originally scheduled for December 15, remains undecided and unclear.

RIP: Maryanne Amacher, experimental composer

From Pitchfork:

Arts Journal's Post Classic blog reports that the experimental composer Maryanne Amacher has died, possibly after suffering a stroke. According to Post Classic, she was 66 years old.

Amacher was known for her installations, which caused listeners to question the nature of sound and the effects it has on the brain. She studied with Karlheinz Stockhausen and worked with the likes of John Cage and Alvin Curran. She was the first Rosekrans Artist in Residence at Mills College, and more recently she taught electronic music at Bard.

- Maryanne Amacher Wikipedia entry

When it comes to new music there is hype slinging and there is dung slinging and while it can be argued that the two exercises are one in the same, it is often true that the former quickly begets the latter due to the overpowering, addictive rush that comes with "breaking a band" and all that entails. That is why it's always nice to see new bands weather small storms of attention but remain relatively free from the eye of the hype hurling hurricane by getting on with the job at hand: making good records. One of the minor but significant music success stories of this year is Woodsist, who have understatedly released fantastic lo-fi gems, from the reissue of Kurt Vile's lauded Constant Hitmaker to The Fresh & Onlys' recent Grey-Eyed Girls to Woods' beloved Songs of Shame. After a couple of number of highly-rated singles, including this one (scroll down), the latest jewel in Woodsist's crown, Real Estate, will issue their very geographical/nautical/seasonal-themed self-titled, debut album on November 17. From that throwaway album description you would be right to wonder if I'm talking out of my ass. I am (as always), but take a look at these song titles and tell me I'm wrong!

[Note: disregard the song "Fake Blues" as part of this discussion as it is the one subject aberration on the album. That track is about John Mayer.]

Real Estate:

1. Beach Comber
2. Pool Swimmers
3. Suburban Dogs
4. Black Lake
5. Atlantic City
6. Fake Blues
7. Green River
8. Suburban Beverage
9. Let's Rock the Beach
10. Snow Days

'Tis the time of the year when all good folk flock to New York for the annual entertainment orgy CMJ, and Real Estate is no exception. The New Jersey quartet of Alex Bleeker, Martin Courtney IV, Etienne Pierre Duguay (Predator Vision), and Matthew Mondanile III (Ducktails) braved the wild, raging Hudson River in order to play the obligatory three-dozen CMJ shows in six days of which they are in the midst of doing. Not in NYC? That's okay, because there are other East Coast shows on this tour as well as a recently announced slate of West Coast dates. Apart from Japandroids (who they played with the past few days in New York), Real Estate will be performing selected dates with similarly buzzed-up hotties Neon Indian, Vivian Girls, and Girls (sans Vivian) before travelling westward for gigs, one of which will be with Hüsker Düde Grant Hart.

Superintendents of the world unite!
10.23.09 - New York, NY - The Delancey (Underwater Peoples Showcase)
10.24.09 - Brooklyn, NY - Music Hall of Williamsburg (Mexican Summer Showcase)
10.24.09 - Brooklyn, NY - Market Hotel (Pitchfork Showpaper Benefit)
10.25.09 - New York, NY - The Living Room (Kidrockers Presents) ^
10.30.09 - Storrs, CT - University of Connecticut *
11.02.09 - Hoboken, NJ - Maxwell's +
11.03.09 - Washington, DC - Black Cat +
11.04.09 - Philadelphia, PA - Kung Fu Necktie +
11.06.09 - New York, NY - Bowery Ballroom +
11.07.09 - Boston, MA - Great Scott +
11.08.09 - Ithaca, NY - TBA
11.09.09 - Montréal, QC - Il Motore +
11.10.09 - Toronto, ON - El Mocambo +
11.11.09 - Detroit, MI - Majestic Cafe
11.12.09 - Chicago, IL - Empty Bottle +
11.13.09 - Madison, WI - Der Rathskeller (U of W)
11.14.09 - Iowa City, IA - Public Space One
11.15.09 - Denver, CO - Hi-Dive #
11.16.09 - Salt Lake City, UT - Kilby Court
11.18.09 - Seattle, WA - The Funhouse
11.19.09 - Portland, OR - Holocene
11.20.09 - San Francisco, CA - Hemlock Tavern
11.22.09 - Santa Cruz, CA - Crepe Place
11.23.09 - Los Angeles, CA - Spaceland
11.24.09 - San Diego, CA - TBA
11.25.09 - Phoenix, AZ - Modified Arts
11.26.09 - El Paso, TX - Black Market
11.27.09 - Austin, TX - Mohawk
11.28.09 - Dallas, TX - The Cavern
11.29.09 - Little Rock, AR - Sticky Fingerz
12.01.09 - Atlanta, GA - 529
12.02.09 - Chapel Hill, NC - Local 506
12.03.09 - Baltimore, MD - TBA

^ Neon Indian

* Vivian Girls

+ Girls

# Grant Hart

$ Moon Duo

% The Happy Hollows

Weezer to Tour with Jonas Brothers, Hannah Montana, Kidz Bop Cast! (Not Really, but Isn’t It Funny How Not Surprised You Were?)

Mwwhhaa-ha-ha-haaaaa! Excellent, Igor! Weezer's complete transmogrification into Bowling for Soup is nearing completion! Phase one: Sooooooon, very soooooon (November 3), Raditude will drop from Geffen onto the panic-stricken populace in a torrential rain of pure cheese so THICK... that the poor fools won’t even be able to scream.

Next, phase two: my beautiful Franken-pop creations will play one... no, no! I have it, Igor! They’ll play TWO straight nights on Conan... no, no! Even BETTER: on The Late Show with David Letterman! (on October 29-30). Wmmmmuuuaaaahhahahaha! Ah, the sheer torture of watching Letterman, Igor, I can barely even contain my... Well, nevermind!

Then the Final Phase will commence: Weezer will embark on a tour of North America (yes, yes, Igor, there’s also a couple of shows at the end of this month, including a... ohh, yessss, a Halloween gig in the most DAMNED place on earth: New York City). Oh, the unholy madness of it all! These fools will never even see it coming. And once this homogenized post-mod-goof-geek-power-pop slurry is shoveled down their throats? Why, it’ll simply be too late, my friend. Mmmmhahaha. Chaos will rule, Igor. Chaos. Will. Rule.

10.24.09 - Los Angeles, CA - Palladium
10.31.09 - New York, NY - Hammerstein Ballroom
12.01.09 - Chicago, IL - Aragon Ballroom
12.03.09 - Milwaukee, WI - Eagles Ballroom
12.05.09 - Toronto, ON - Air Canada Center
12.07.09 - Boston, MA - Agganis Arena
12.09.09 - Baltimore, MD - UMBC Fieldhouse
12.10.09 - Philadelphia, PA - Susquehanna Center

New iPhone App Promises to Save You the Trouble of Going to the Record Store to Find Out What’s Cool in Music This Week; It’s Almost As If They Haven’t Heard of Tiny Mix Tapes Before… Except That’s Impossible

Okay, here we go again. Despite our on-the-pulse news delivery, next-level graphic design, “don’t go there, girl”-style record reviews, easy-to-use interface, up-to-the-minute commentary, a crack team of writers, a self-proclaimed “highly sexual” team of editors, and all of the references you could ever want to this one band called Zazen Boys (?), some of you out there still insist on allowing Expert Listening Services (ELS's) other than Tiny Mix Tapes (TMT) to soullessly manufacture the pop culture-related sections of your Social Networking Site (SNS) profiles from the, uh... you know, “ground up.”

So fine. We can handle this. Now, iTunes is getting in on our racket? We say “let them come.”

Panel is a new app in the, you know, App Store founded by L.A. producer Darius Fong that aims to provide music lovers (read: “the opposite of music lovers”) with recommendations from a so-called panel of music industry experts who will stream two albums per week in various iTunes-centric categories (rock, pop, alternative, indie, jazz, hip-hop, etc.) and then, basically, tell you what they like about these albums. It’s kinda like when you go into a good record store and they always have those little handwritten descriptions stickered onto the CDs in the New Releases rack. Except that you’ll also be able to stream the albums (er, that’s the eventual plan, it seems, anyway).

As of now, confirmed panelists include Mark and Wendy Redfern, founders of Under the Radar magazine, Jason Hughes, owner of Seattle's iconic Sonic Boom Records, popular music blogger Justin Gage of Aquarium Drunkard, producer/musician Matt Bayles, and Peter Harper -- sculptor and... wait for it... Ben Harper's brother. Again, each of these cats will offer interviews, album descriptions, etc. for two albums each week. Of course, Panel offers users that dangerous, dangerous one-touch access to the iTunes store where they can be the first to eagerly swipe up The Next Pavement (TNP), carry it over to the digital counter, purchase with their creased and crumpled digital tip money from their analog jobs, tear off the digital shrink-wrap, affix that digital sticker-label thing proudly to the digital trashcan outside where everyone sticks their digital sticker-label things like badges of consumerist valor, run to their digital cars, throw the thing into the digital tray, and mmm-mmm-mmhmmm: savor the sweet, sweet sound of that compressed, downsampled Wowie Digital Zowie (WDZ).

Well, shit. I guess that’s pretty much it for us here at TMT, then. Good luck in the new decade, folks. Mr P, could you hand me that gas can over there? P??? Yeah... the gas can. No... it’s... yeah, over there, it’s back there. Okay cool... thanks.