My Bloody Valentine (Non-3D Version) Confirm Post-Coachella Dates

AMG, chopped: A psychopathic miner terrorizes the town of Harmony. 10 years ago, the lone survivor of an accident deep in the mines awoke from a coma and slashed his way through the town in a bloody, vengeance-fueled rampage. Though shot and apparently killed, the memories of Harry Warden still haunt both the town and Tom Hanniger, the heir to the mine and one of the last people to see Harry before his disappearance. Just as Tom heads back to his hometown after a long time away, so do the killings ramp up again. While he mends his torn relationship with his ex-girlfriend Sarah and her husband Axl, citizens are knocked off one by one in spectacularly gruesome fashion. Has Harry come from beyond the grave or is there a new killer donning the suit and mask?

Well, I'll tell you: Tom picks Sarah up to take her to Axel's love nest to convince her that Axel is the killer. Axel then calls her and tells her that Tom is the killer. She crashes Tom's car and makes her way to Axel's shack. Sarah is chased by the killer all the way to the mine. There, Sarah goes into the shaft where the original murders took place, where she is joined by both Tom and Axel, and after a brief stand off, Axel and Sarah realize that Tom is delusional. A montage then plays out all the murders in the film again; this time showing the aftermath and beforehand, revealing Tom as the killer. The killing, in the mine in which Tom was locked in the cage, is played out again, this time showing Tom committing the murder, then locking himself in the cage (so, it was a hallucination that Harry locked him in the cage). Sarah shoots a tank and causes an explosion and subsequently a partial cave-in. She escapes with Axel. A rescue team comes in to the mine to help Tom, but Tom kills one of the rescuers and escapes the scene dressed in the rescue worker's clothing, setting up a potential sequel.

Now that I've spoiled the ending for My Bloody Valentine 3-D, you can concentrate on gearing up for My Bloody Valentine's upcoming tourdates:
04.18.09 - Indio, CA - Coachella
04.21.09 - Austin, TX - Austin Music Hall
04.22.09 - Dallas, TX - The Palladium
04.24.09 - Denver, CO - The Fillmore Auditorium
04.27.09 - Seattle, WA - WaMu Theater at Qwest Field
05.28.09 - Barcelona, Spain - Primavera Sound Festival
05.29.09 - Barcelona, Spain - Primavera Sound Festival

Aaron Dilloway and Nate Young Go To Europe For Spring Break Tour

It seems like only yesterday when Aaron Dilloway and Nate Young were scumming up your neighborhood basement with their junky electronics and broken guitar squall as part of Wolf Eyes. But now it's 2009, and things have changed: Aaron Dilloway left the band four years ago and was replaced by Mike Connelly of Hair Police; they're signed to Sub Pop; and they've become one of the biggest "noise" bands around. Over the years, both Dilloway and Young (who is still in Wolf Eyes) have kept themselves busy by working on various projects and running their respective labels -- Dilloway with Hanson Records and Young with his AA Records label.

This March and April will see the two heading to Europe for a set of dates, with each of them performing solo sets. Before hitting the road, however, the two will head up to Stockholm, Sweden to do some recording at the Institute for Electro-Acoustic Music in Sweden (EMS). From there, they will play some select dates with The Skull Defekts and finally end things off in Glasgow, Scotland.

Here are the dates:
03.26.09 - Stockholm, Sweden - Skull Club*
03.27.09 - Gothenberg, Sweden - Roda Sten*
03.28.09 - Oslo, Norway - Revolver*
03.29.09 - Copenhagen, Denmark - Lygten*#
03.30.09 - Berlin, Germany*!
03.21.09 - Den Haag, Netherlands - Helbard$
04.01.09 - Antwerp, Belgium
04.02.09 - Paris, Frace
04.03.09 - Lisbon, Portugal
04.04.09 - Porto, Portugal
04.06.09 - Brighton, UK - The Freebutt %
04.07.09 - London, UK - The Grosvenor
04.08.09 - Nottingham, UK - The Chameleon
04.09.09 - Leeds, UK
04.10.09 - Glasgow, Scotland - Stereo+

! Neptune

*The Skull Defekts

#Blue Sabbath Black Fiji

$ God Willing, Unicorn Hard-On

% Blood Stereo, Family Battlesnake

+ Heather Leigh Murray & Richard Youngs

Photo: [Seth Tisue]

A List Of Canadian Delights Includes Metric’s New Album Fantasies, To Be Released April 14

Our neighbors to the north cultivates wonderful people and comes up with wonderful ideas. In this mix of delightful Canadians and Canadian-ness are eco-friendly bagged milk, the Labatt's mascot, mounties, and all-star-rotating-member superbands. But let's not forget to add to the list Emily Haines and ipso facto Metric.

Live It Out, Metric's last album, was released way back in 2005. Since then, they've done some intermittent touring, with band members scattering off to their own side projects. But for those of you scratching your heads and wondering when you can get your hands on the next Metric album, your wait is a short one. Fantasies, the band's fourth full-length album, will be available in stores April 14, released by Last Gang Records in Canada and independently-released elsewhere. By pre-ordering here, you can enjoy several tracks now, including "Help I'm Alive," an acoustic version of "Gimme Sympathy," and a Pink Floyd cover of "Nobody Home." Meanwhile, the digital version of Fantasies will be available for download March 31.

Fantasies tracklist:

1. Help I'm Alive
2. Sick Muse
3. Satellite Mind
4. Twilight Galaxy
5. Gold Guns Girls
6. Gimme Sympathy
7. Collect Call
8. Front Row
9. Blindness
10. Stadium Love

Google Assembles 90+ Orchestra Through YouTube Auditions

It was inevitable really. Google has appointed the first-ever YouTube orchestra, with over 90 musicians being selected based on video auditions uploaded to the video-sharing website. Over 3,000 people submitted applications, with selections based on online votes and the opinions of classical specialists from renowned orchestras. The winning contestants, representing nearly 30 countries, will come together April 12 in New York City to take master classes from a variety of music experts. They will then perform at the Carnegie Hall on April 15 under the tutelage of Michael Tilson Thomas.

In many ways, this is merely the next step from the likes of American Idol and The X-Factor in the U.K. Classical music has always had a higher barrier to entry, mainly because of the sophistication required to play a cello, violin, trumpet, etc. But Calvin Lee, one of the lucky few to be selected for the YouTube orchestra, admitted that he had “barely played his violin for the last 15 years.” This is compared with the months of preparation typical classical music auditions entail.

The winners are clearly adept at their instruments and undoubtedly have much more talent than the Kelly Clarksons and Leona Lewises of this world. But when you have Timothy Lee, Google’s product marketing manager (ah, now we understand), arguing that "classical music is hungry for innovation,” is this really what we should be expecting? Music has become so dull for us we need big corporate marketing gimmicks to reinvigorate our interest? That’s not innovation! That’s making a quick buck!

San Franciscoites Unite! Papercuts And Vetiver Team Up For Tour

Several things popped into my head while writing this news story:

- Is San Franciscoites even a real word? San Franciscoeons? San Franeons?
- Vetiver are finally touring North America in support of their latest album, Tight Knit (TMT Review), out now on Sub Pop.
- What’s the deal with Papercuts? Do they have a new album or somethi—oh snap, they do. You Can Have What You Want will be released April 14 via Gnomonsong.

Papercuts' You Can Have What You Want tracklisting:

1. Once We Walked In The Sunlight
2. A Dictator's Lament
3. The Machine Will Tell Us So
4. A Peculiar Hallelujah
5. Jet Plane
6. Dead Love
7. Future Primitive
8. You Can Have What You Want
9. The Void
10. The Wolf

San Franciscoites In Your City:
04.24.09 - San Francisco, CA - Cafe Du Nord *
05.02.09 - Arlington, VA - Lota #
05.03.09 - New York, NY - Bowery Ballroom #
05.04.09 - Petersborough, NH - Glass Museum #
05.05.09 - Winooski, VT - Monkey House #
05.06.09 - Allston, MA - Harper's Ferry #
05.07.09 - Brooklyn, NY - The Bell House #
05.10.09 - Cleveland, OH - Grog Shop #
05.11.09 - Athens, OH - Union Bar and Grill #
05.12.09 - Chicago, IL - AV-aerie #
05.13.09 - Pontiac, MI - The Pike Room at The Crofoot #
05.14.09 - London, ON - Call The Office #
05.15.09 - Toronto, ON - Horseshoe Tavern #
05.16.09 - Buffalo, NY - Big Orbit's Soundlab #
05.17.09 - Pittsfield, MA - Copperworks #

* Cryptacize, The Finches

# Vetiver

Damien Jurado Begins Tour April 1; Don’t Be A Fool, It Ain’t No Joke

Surprise! Damien Jurado's tour starts on April 1, the day for pranks, hoaxes, and shenanigans. But this is no joke. The Seattle-based indie folk rocker will be promoting his latest album, Caught In Trees (TMT Review), released on the Secretly Canadian label. With a solo career that's lasted more than a decade, Jurado's willingness to experiment with recording techniques and his intense, Raymond Carver-like lyrics have kept him on a veritable Who's Who list of indie rockers.

Check out the still frame to his "Caskets" video here. This guy's serious, even in suspenders. Damn, Damien!

04.01.09 - Spokane, WA - Empyrean Coffee House
04.03.09 - Boise, ID - Neurolux*
04.04.09 - Provo, UT - Velour*
04.05.09 - Denver, CO - Hi-Dive*
04.07.09 - Omaha, NE - The Waiting Room*
04.08.09 - Iowa City, IA - The Picador*
04.09.09 - St. Paul, MN - Turf Club*
04.10.09 - Chicago, IL - Schubas*
04.11.09 - Bloomington, IN - Russian Recording*
04.12.09 - Ann Arbor, MI - The Blind Pig*
04.14.09 - Toronto, ON - The Drake Hotel*
04.15.09 - Montreal, QC - Il Motore*
04.16.09 - Cambridge, MA - TT The Bear's Place*
04.17.09 - Brooklyn, NY - The Bell House*
04.18.09 - Philadelphia, PA - First Unitarian Chapel*
04.19.09 - Vienna, VA - Jammin' Java*
04.21.09 - Asheville, NC - Grey Eagle*
04.22.09 - Birmingham, AL - The Bottletree*
04.23.09 - Atlanta, GA - The Earl*
04.24.09 - Memphis, TN - Hi-Tone Cafe*
04.25.09 - Nashville, TN - The Basement*
04.27.09 - Norman, OK - The Opolis*
04.28.09 - Denton, TX - Dan's Silverleaf*
04.29.09 - Austin, TX - Cactus Cafe*
05.01.09 - Tucson, AZ - Club Congress*
05.02.09 - San Diego, CA - Casbah*
05.03.09 - Los Angeles, CA - Spaceland*
05.04.09 - Santa Barbara, CA - Muddy Waters*
05.05.09 - San Francisco, CA - Bottom of the Hill*
05.07.09 - Portland, OR - Doug Fir Lounge*
05.08.09 - Seattle, WA - Crocodile Cafe*

* Laura Gibson

Grab Your Doobies and Twist Your Baseball Caps Backwards – Cypress Hill Are Back!

Upon hearing that early-’90s THC-laced hip-hop quartet Cypress Hill are coming back with their first new album in five years, I took a mad bong rip. How else can a person possibly celebrate such news? I asked my dealer, Little Mike (he's actually quite large), and he started telling me how he saw them live once in ’98 on their IV tour, "...and there was this, like, giant inflatable raft man. No, it was a monkey, man, but inflatable, and sitting on a large, like, golden throne, man. Haha, it was totally, like real gold, too. And the monkey was smoking this phat joint, man! It was awesome! And they had a big gong on stage that they hit sometimes."

The new album is slated to be released this fall on Suburban Noize Records. It hasn't been named yet, presumably because they keep forgetting the title they had settled on the previous night.

Fleet Foxes Can’t Stop Touring, Or People Might Stop Talking About Them

Ah, the sophomore year of the buzz band! Why, I remember waaaay back in aught eight, back during the days of the Bush Administration and all of its economic prosperity, when the world was first introduced to the young, fresh, clean-cut, short-haired stylings Fleet Foxes. Yes sir, those were the salad days for frontman Robin Pecknold and his proud folk-rock combo, taking the public by storm with the stirring one-two punch of the Sun Giant EP and its interrelated Fleet Foxes (TMT Review) LP last spring. All glory was theirs in the ensuing summer (and fall and winter) of love, their cups overflowing with festival dates, media coverage, women, and year-end-list-mania. Mark my words: 2008 was the year of Fleet Foxes!

But now its 2009. The honeymoon is over, and Robin’s rock ‘n’ roll lifestyle has aged severely, causing many to look away. Hard times have hit the U.S. and world economies, and what are Fleet Foxes doing with themselves now, you ask? Why, they’re playing a handful of spring dates around the west coast of the U.S., just like how your band is. Ain’t that showbiz for you? Oh well; I wonder when that Pains of Being Pure at Heart band is coming to town?

“Handful of dates” Tour 2K9:
04.12.09 - Portland, OR - Crystal Ballroom
04.13.09 - Arcata, CA - Arcata Community Center
04.14.09 - San Francisco, CA - The Fillmore
04.15.09 - San Francisco, CA - Palace of Fine Arts Theatre
04.16.09 - Santa Cruz, CA - Rio Theatre
04.18.09 - Indio, CA - Coachella Valley Music and Arts Festival
04.21.09 - Oakland, CA - Fox Theater
05.25.09 - George, WA - Sasquatch Music Festival

Remaining Beatles Reunite for David Lynch’s New Age Benefit; Rumors Finally Squelched Regarding What Paul McCartney Sounds Like Backwards

On April 4, at the Radio City Music Hall, Paul McCartney and Ringo Starr -- former members of obscure pop group, The Beatles -- will be reuniting for the first time since 2002 for David Lynch's "Change Begins Within" concert, which benefits his foundation for "Consciousness-Based Education and World Peace."

David Lynch, presumed ghostwriter for such sites as as well as numerous Dr. Bronner's soap bottles, has also started his own foundation based on Sting's body movements and transcendental meditation. Turns out David Lynch doesn't only enjoy midget dream sequences, hate the iPhone, make really bizarre commercials full of floating blue lips, but is also a leading promoter of transcendental meditation being taught in elementary schools.

The show also features performances by Donovan, Eddie Vedder, Moby, Sheryl Crow, Ben Harper, Bettye LaVette, Paul Horn, and My Morning Jacket's Jim James. My only hope is that Donovan and Sheryl Crow dress up as John and George and get into a fist fight/make-out session with Paul and Ringo while David Lynch's oversized head hovers 10-feet above the stage, green and holographic, singing "Maxwell's Silver Hammer" to itself in reverse while Moby and Eddie Vedder waltz across the stage complementing each other profusely. Then Bettye LaVette will crawl on stage, smell a bottle of perfume, scream, laugh, cry, and fully climax, before she flies off, stage right, at which point Ben Harper wakes up in a cold sweat, relieved it was all just a dream. "Or was it?" he asks himself as he looks around to find that Paul Horn and Jim James are lying next to him, scandalously, in his California King.

Come on. It's entirely possible that this could happen, and you know it.

J Dilla’s Work Subjected To Posthumous Collection, Features Tracks By Artists He Made Sick Beats For

Honestly, I really can’t stand nine-out-of-ten tribute albums. Most of them feel less like a genuine tribute and much more like a chance to cash in on the loss of a talented artist. But for those of you unfamiliar with the production work of Jay Dee -- who passed away in 2006 -- Dillanthology, Volume 1 might be a neat collection to check out.

The album will feature some of J Dilla’s finer production with musicians such as Common, Erykah Badu, and De La Soul to name a few. It will be the first of several marketed as “a tribute to his memory and spirit.” Meanwhile, future volumes will include Dilla’s remix work and production on his own musical efforts.

Dillanthology, Volume 1 will hit shelves March 31, thanks to Rapster. However, for a more fitting tribute to the late master, please check out Madlib's Beat Konducta Vol. 5-6.



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