Silver Jews Get Israeli On Your Ass, Tour Europe With Tel-Aviv Rockers Monotonix

Let's cut the bullshit and forge the nitty gritty here:

Monotonix: Three-piece Israeli classic rock yet punk-at-heart freak-out band; have tendencies to destroy all venues, playing the show from within the audience, dousing themselves in beer, and lighting themselves on fire; while the Tel-Avivers proclaim "classic rock" as their prime inspiration, they don't consider their own music "classic classic rock," which is just about the only way to put it.

----

Silver Jews: David Berman and (at one time) Steven Malkmus' alt-country, indie-rock project predating Pavement; sedated and sardonic with nine years of experience and six albums under their belt (come July); Berman refused to play live until 2006 -- now tours with his wife and fellow Jews member Cassie Berman.

Put it all together and what have you got? Something incomprehensibly epic.

See It To Believe It.

Silver Jews tour:

Watch out Jenny Lewis: The Watson Twins announce the release of Fire Songs

It’s all because of Conor Oberst’s sweaty lovesick lyrics. After releasing four albums with Rilo Kiley, Conor Oberst convinced Jenny Lewis to put together a solo album, 2006's Rabbit Fur Coat. But it wasn’t just Jenny Lewis’ soulful voice that made the record worth playing on repeat. Behind the storytelling of songs like “Rabbit Fur Coat” and “You Are What You Love” were two Louisville Kentucky twins who belted out vocals on their identical sets of tonsils: The Watson Twins.

Consisting of Chandra and Leigh, The Watson Twins drove from Louisville to L.A where they shared drinks and laughs with the likes of Rilo Kiley and Earlimart, which only logically led to concerts in Tokyo and Berlin, and appearances on David Letterman and Conan O’Brien. The whirlwind of traveling with Jenny Lewis led to The Watson twins putting together their own songs, all found on their homemade EP Southern Manners.

Most recently, The Twins sold out a performance at the Getty Museum and appeared at SXSW, and now these folk twins are going to show you how Kentucky girls do it on record. Their first album, Fire Songs, is set to be released June 24 by Vanguard, famous for artists such as Joan Baez and Buddy Guy. Get a taste of it on The Watson Twins' MySpace.

Tracklisting for Fire Songs:

Beirut Cancel European Tour

Zach Condon has announced the cancellation of Beirut's summer European tour. According to a post on Beirut's website, Condon explains how the cancellation is mainly due to "personal" reasons, which include... well, it's probably best if you just read it yourself in its entirety (see below). I can't really relate to Condon's sentiments in any meaningful way, but I can sure sympathize.

...

A Letter from Zach

"It's with great regret that I have to tell all of you that Beirut is canceling their summer European shows. My reasons for doing this are many, a lot of them personal, but I still feel I need to provide something of an explanation.

The past two years have been a mindblowing experience. From the first indications that people were putting songs from Gulag up on their blogs to our incredible tour of Australia and New Zealand that we just completed, everything that has happened has been beyond anything I'd ever hoped could happen with the music I wrote and recorded in my bedroom. Once things started happening, I decided I wanted to do everything as big as possible. So, I set about putting together a large band, and giving that band a huge sound, and making the most spectacular records we possibly could.

"I know this can sound like an artist shithead kind of comment, but going through all that really does have its low points along with the highs. The responsibilities of gathering people around your vision, working with great people like those who work directly for the band and those at the label, wanting to insure that every show is as good as humanly possible so that every single person in the audience sees that we put in a real effort, all of that leads to a lot of issues in terms of doing right by people who have done you right.

"It's come time to change some things, reinvent some others, and come back at some point with a fresh perspective and batch of songs.

Please accept my apologies. I promise we'll be back, in some form."

...

Here are the canceled tourdates:

Thanks Edwin!

My cat is an asshole. He contributes absolutely nothing to the house. A true freeloader. He demands to be fed at least half a dozen times per day, and when I finally pour the food, he head-butts the bag so that food scatters into his water bowl. Then, he has the nerve to demand fresh water because of the floating food. He has a special blanket set up on the recliner that he knows he's supposed to sleep on, yet night after night he moves to the couch once I've gone to bed. When inside the house, he sits at the door meowing to go out; when outside, he meows to come in. When I try to walk anywhere in the house, he walks about six inches in front of me in a zig-zag pattern, making it impossible for me to go even a few feet without tripping. He spends the bulk of his waking hours sitting in the window sill staring blankly at the front yard. He prefers to do so with the window open and will pester me about opening it, like, right after I start to nap. Opposable thumbs, bitch.

It's really a lot like having a teenage son. He's got no job, no ambition, no respect for authority; just a sense of entitlement to the fruits of my labor. He has many qualities which one could only describe as "emo." He's been known to engage in highly objectionable behavior involving his testicles, often in the presence of guests. He comes and goes without notice, sometimes worrying me by staying out all night without so much as a phone call, just to let me know everything's okay. Clearly, I'm not asking a lot. Just a little help around the house every once in a while -- and, if it's not too much to ask, a little respect.

Also, Müm is touring:

Beloved Belgian youth sleuth Tintin is a favorite of many emotionally stunted peeps. Forever getting into complex scrapes and head-spinning adventures that take him to exotic locales and remote climes (and on more than one occasion, The Moon) the wussy, blond, go-getting cub reporter is an enigma. He frequently meets fantastic characters, but instead of developing an awesome drug addiction or boning some grateful heiress, he chooses to hang around a perpetually drunken sea captain and his faithful companion Snowy, the Fox terrier.

Walking with my girlfriend downtown last week, I spotted someone who looked EXACTLY like one of the bumbling Thom(p)sons from Hergé's animated stories.

Me (excitedly): “Hey, that guy looks exaaactly like one of the Thom(p)sons!”

Her: “Oh, you mean Dupond and Dupont?”

Me: “What?”

Her: “Dupond and Dupont... from Tintin.”

Me: Yeah, I know Tintin... I live and breathe Tintin, beotch. But those gooves are called Thomson and Thompson.”

Her: Yeah, to English idiots. In French, the language that the stories were originally written in, those “gooves,” as you call them, are called Dupond and Dupont.

Ah yes, being the clueless xenophobe that I am, I conveniently forgot that each country calls the two mustachioed, bowler-hatted bumblers something different (i.e.: Hernández and Fernández, Schultze and Schulze, Tik and Tak).

Me (conceding): “Oh yeah....”

Right about now you might be asking why on Earth am I blathering about goofy-looking twin detectives from a comic that no one reads when I should be dithering on about the spectacular-looking pop couple The Rosebuds that everybody loves. You would be right to be curious. So, to afford you some closure on this anecdote -- yeah, The Rosebuds? I like ’em fine, but my girlfriend liked them back in the ’80s when they were called The Thompson Twins.

The shape-shifting duo of Kelly Crisp and Ivan Howard will bring to the live forum their latest album, the Merge-released elec-retro master class Night of the Furies, their hooky debut album The Rosebuds Make Out, their melancholic gloom of a second album Birds Make Good Neighbors, and hopefully some new tunes of unspecified orientation when they play a string of dates beginning late April. The tour includes shows at many of the usual suspected haunts, including one night in Kentucky and one show at the “My Old Kentucky Blog” concert... in Indianapolis. Nope, I don't get it either. Billions of bilious blue blistering barnacles, here are the dates!
04.28.08 - Lexington, KY - The Dame
04.29.08 - Chicago, IL - Subterranean
04.30.08 - Indianapolis, IN - My Old Kentucky Blog Concert
05.01.08 - Columbia, MO - Mojo’s
05.02.08 - Oxford, MS - Proud Larry’s
05.03.08 - Nashville, TN - Mercy Lounge
05.04.08 - Asheville, NC - Grey Eagle
05.06.08 - Carrboro, NC - Cat’s Cradle
05.07.08 - Charlottesville, VA - Satellite Ballroom
05.08.08 - Washington, DC - Black Cat
05.09.08 - Philadelphia, PA - Johnny Brenda’s
05.10.08 - New York, NY - Bowery Ballroom
05.11.08 - Brooklyn, NY - Music Hall of Williamsburg
05.13.08 - Boston, MA - Paradise Rock Club
05.14.08 - Portland, ME - TBD
05.15.08 - Montréal, Quebec - La Sala Rossa
05.16.08 - Toronto, Ontario - Lee’s Palace
05.17.08 - Buffalo, NY - Tralf Music Hall
05.18.08 - Pittsburgh, PA - Mr. Small’s Theatre

From Grönland Records:

"We are very sad to report the death of Klaus Dinger, who died suddenly of heart failiure four days before his 62nd birthday on March 20th 2008.

Dinger formed Neu! with Micheal Rother in 1971, releasing three seminal albums: Neu!, Neu 2! and Neu 75!

His landmark drumming style on these records, a propulsive almost surf-like repetitious groove defined the term 'motorik' and has had a profound influence on a huge range of artists such as Primal Scream, Stereolab, Wilco, David Bowie, The Boredoms and Four Tet.

He later formed La Dusseldorf, selling over a million copies in the 70s and 80s.

The burial took place amongst a private circle of family and friends. He will be greatly missed."

- Official website
- Wikipedia entry
- Grönland Records
- YouTube: Kraftwerk - "Heavy Metal Kids"(live)
- YouTube: Neu performing "Hero" (live)
- YouTube: La Düsseldorf

Labels Seek $2.5 Million in Damages from The Pirate Bay; “Record companies can go screw themselves,” says The Pirate Bay

Back in January, The Pirate Bay's founders were accused of being accessories to copyright infringement by studios and labels, including Warner, MGM, Sony BMG, Columbia Pictures, and 20th Century Fox (TMT News). And now -- surprise, surprise -- The International Federation of the Phonographic Industry (IFPI) wanna piece too, a $2.5 million one, for the sharing of 24 albums, 9 movies, and 4 video games. Serious shit? Wouldn't appear to be, according to co-founder Gottfried Svartholm Warg's responses in Sweden's The Local:

- Response 1: "Record companies can go screw themselves."

- Response 2: "We mostly laughed at [the claim]."

- Response 3: "It doesn't appear if the record companies have much of a strategy at all."

- Response 4: "[The IFPI's] numbers are pure fantasy."

- Response 5: "As usual, we're not too concerned."

Frankly, I'd just pay the $2.5 million. Life's too short to stand for anything.

Sony BMG Accused of Software Piracy

PointDev, a French company that makes Windows admin software, has accused Sony BMG of pirating software. And it's not just one or two programs, but as much as 47% of Sony BMG's servers are suspected of running pirated software, according to a recent raid.

Here's a translated quote from the company (via the original story and ZeroPaid):

We are not interested in an amicable settlement. It is not just a question of money but more importantly in principle. The rate of software piracy in the company is very high. [...] We are forced to watch every week if key software pirates are not on the Internet. We are a small company of six employees. Instead of trying to protect us, we could spend this time to develop ourselves.

The raid, conducted by the Business Software Alliance, was implemented after a Sony IT sought help with a program called Ideal Migration. However, after Sony BMG provided the program's key, a tech support person at PointDev discovered that it was pirated.

Obviously, what Sony BMG now needs more than ever is sympathy in these trying times. Both pro- and anti-file-sharing advocates need to set their differences aside and help support Sony BMG. It's not fun to be accused of pirating software, and it's even worse to have to pay penalties for it -- even if the company paying the fine is seeking to increase that fine for music file-sharers. Fucking assholes.

Death Cab Add More Tour Dates, Cutie Has Abortion

This just in: someone must have told Pacific Northwestern doily-rockers Death Cab for Cutie that they could, you know, make more money by playing more shows on their upcoming Spring romp through North America (a.k.a. "Death Cab Country") in support of their upcoming Atlantic Records release, Narrow Stairs. Rather savvily, the band decided that making as much money as possible before Ben "Hey Ya'll" Gibbard gets any MORE BEAUTIFUL would be a very good thing -- so, yeah, they are going to go ahead and play all of these dates.

But enough with this "objective reporting" bullshit. What exactly does this mean to YOU, the jilted TMT reader?

Well... plenty, I reckon!

For example, I guess it means that, if you have younger cousins or something, it's now your duty to stick to them like glue and make sure they don't waste their mom and step-dad's money on concert tickets? And who among us doesn't relish an opportunity to be responsible??

Or maybe it means that you and your buddies have a new summertime record to "enjoy ironically"? You do that sometimes, right?

Or it could mean that you've got a whole new Ben Gibbard lyric sheet to crib from when you're trying to seal the deal with that uptight girl/guy from work.

See, Death Cab might even get you laid! Now aren't you glad you didn't scroll past this shit?

Right. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to devote the rest of my morning to formating this now-sizable list of tourdates for this shell of a band. Have a super day, everyone!

For Our Older Readers: Parlophone’s Best-Of Radiohead Release to Be Release in June

Hi old person! Wow, you actually managed to turn on the computer without your daughter's help. Congratulations! Here, let me enlarge the font for you, so you don't have to squint at the screen:

There... is that better? Alright, oldie but goodie, I've got some exciting Rock Music news for you, boy oh boy. Radiohead's ex-record label, Parlophone, is set to release -- Hey, you want some anti-aging cream? Not now? Okay. -- a best-of compilation for Radiohead. No, this isn't that shitty box set (TMT News); it's much, much worse.

Coming out June 2, Best of Radiohead will come in three, maybe four versions: (1) a single CD version, for those of you who mainly want a solid disc to nestle away with your Sheryl Crow and Dave Matthews CDs; (2) a double CD version, for those of you who want that one Romeo & Juliet song; (3) a limited-edition 4LP version, for those of you who collect antiques and quilts; and (4) a non-CD, non-vinyl, non-MP3 version -- it's just a version that you can't hold or hear because you refuse to buy this piece of shit release because Parlophone have no shame. You'd be better off purchasing a stick with which to shoo away bratty kids.

Hey, your dentures fell out. Viagra, white hair, arched back, rocking chair, etc. God, you're old.

Best of Radiohead tracklisting (CD version):

  

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