Liars Tour, Pet Boa Constrictors, Japanese/English Translators

Lying is a destructive, alienating habit (just ask The Dark Knight’s Joker!). So, before we here at TMT’s 3rd Floor, Dayton Ohio-based office/private oxygen bar go around posting just any old news story about Liars allegedly playing more summer dates next month with Radiohead, we figured that we’d better make sure that our facts were straight... you know, in order to cut down on all of that potential fibbing that might slip by.

So, a few of us staff writers got into the Kompressor that I definitely own and certainly don’t lease, drove out to Liars’ home in Chicago, and talked to the ladies in the band about what their recent experience being on the road with Radiohead was really like. This is what they said, according to the Japanese/English translators that they travel with:

In a world full of fear and ripe with insincerity it’s such a relief to have met Radiohead. They are purveyors of truth, beauty and a moral responsibility to the planet. We've been welcomed with literal open arms and thoroughly schooled on how to function as a band -- not just musically, but ethically too. The honor is in learning from the best, and from the beginning we've been in class... For now, we'd like to send our huge thanks to the Radiohead crew for being so super crazy nice and supportive to us. We'll see them... during our West Coast tour with [them] in August -- so no tears yet.

Now, August is upon us, and it seems like Liars will indeed be touring the West Coast of the United States with Radiohead. The facts have been corroborated by TMT’s Fact-Checking/Regicide Department, who determined -- after speaking with several of the bandmates’ parents, label mates, children, same-sex partners, and pet boa constrictors -- that everything checked out just fine! Now... do you wanna know how I got these scars???

* Radiohead

Iggy Pop and The Stooges’ Rental Truck Recovered! But That’s Not All That Was Recovered… Wait, Yes It Is

As we reported yesterday (TMT News), Iggy Pop and The Stooges woke up Monday morning to an empty parking space. Good morning! Apparently, their rental truck and the music equipment inside it were stolen. But there is some good news currently trickling down the long, phallic press pipe: according to Rolling Stone, the 15-foot yellow Penske truck was discovered by Canadian police several blocks from their Montreal hotel (good work, pigs). Unfortunately, the musical equipment was nowhere to found.

That won't stop The Stooges, though, as their gig in Toronto tonight is still on. Rather than retooling their live rock show as an impressionistic dance production, the band will use borrowed equipment to keep the rock spirit alive. Hope they borrowed a BOSS Metal Zone distortion pedal, because I have a feeling The Stooges will want to rock harder than they've ever rocked before.

Your Pretty Face Is Going to Hell:

Oh, Jack White’s Very Popular. The Sportos, the Motorheads, Geeks, Sluts, Bloods, Waistoids, Dweebies, Dickheads…They All Adore Him. They Think He’s a Righteous Dude. The Raconteurs Head Into Further Summer Festival Madness.

Things Jack White can do:

- Sing, act, dance... capoeira!
- Take lemons, make lemonade.
- Punch out punk-ass copy-cats who probably deserved it anyway.
- Spit bullets on the mic.
- Sire miracle babies with supermodel wife.
- Snag the coveted Bond theme for the upcoming Quantum of Solace.
- Assemble a rag-tag bunch of minstrels and turn them into stadium-trouncing monsters of rock!

Yes, everything White touches turns to multi-platinum. So while The Raconteurs flit and fly between their home base of Nashville and far-off vistas like Paris and Luxembourg (and Reading!) frustrated combos the nation over continue to fart around the country with all bandmates and gear stuffed into ramshackle Chrysler Sebrings. Luckily, The Raconteurs are more than just famous players as evidenced on their two delightful albums – Broken Boy Soldiers and Consolers of the Lonely – and have rightfully attracted followers in droves. Seriously, if a new study on obesity was looking for larger test groups (groan...) they could start with The Raconteurs’ audiences.

The supergroup-of-sorts will continue their shifty sched throughout August and September, during which they will play a bunch of festival gigs in the U.S. and oversees as well as some shows with The Kills in assorted theatres, auditoriums, and bowls. Not bad, but I’m holding back props until they play either Pompeii or my backyard.
08.09.08 - Pittsburgh, PA - New American Music Union Festival
08.23.08 - Reading, England - Reading Festival
08.24.08 - Leeds, England - Leeds Festival
08.26.08 - Edinburgh, Scotland - Edge Festival @ Corn Exchange
08.28.08 - Luxembourg City, Luxembourg - Den Atelier
08.29.08 - Paris, France - Rock en Seine
09.16.08 - Portland, OR - Roseland Theater #
09.17.08 - Portland, OR - Roseland Theater #
09.18.08 - Vancouver, British Columbia - Maulkin Bowl (Stanley Park) #
09.19.08 - Seattle, WA - WaMu Theater #
09.21.08 - San Francisco, CA - Treasure Island Music Festival
09.22.08 - Los Angeles, CA - Greek Theater #
09.23.08 - Los Angeles, CA - Greek Theater #
09.24.08 - San Diego, CA - SDSU Open Air Theater #
09.25.08 - Santa Barbara, CA - Santa Barbara Bowl #
09.28.08 - Austin, TX - Austin City Limits Festival
09.29.08 - Memphis, TN - Cannon Center #
09.30.08 - Nashville, TN - Ryman Auditorium #
10.01.08 - Atlanta, GA - The Tabernacle #

# The Kills

Burial Confirms Identity, to Release New 12-Inch, Working on New LP, Tan

It really is no big deal, and we at TMT usually try to stay away from the more gossip-y stuff, but it's nice to get confirmation every once in awhile. Burial, the highly acclaimed dubstep producer, has officially revealed his name to be Will Bevan. According to a recent MySpace post:

for a while theres been some talk about who i am , but its not a big deal i wanted to be unknown because i just want it to be all about the tunes. over the last year the unknown thing become an issue so im not into it any more.

im a lowkey person and i just want to make some tunes, nothing else. my names will bevan, im from south london.

The name has been kicking around for quite awhile -- most notably from The Independent and his publishing company BMI -- so it's not too surprising to those of you following his every move (you should be moving to his every sound).

Meanwhile, Bevan goes on to say that he's working on a new album -- the follow-up to Untrue (TMT Review) and his self-titled release (TMT Review) -- and plans to release a 12-inch of four new songs in the "next few weeks."

[Thanks Tipster Doofus!]

Akimbo Prep for Fall Tour and New Album, Jersey Shores, Eagerly Await Discovery Channel’s Shark Week

The woman next to you at the coffeeshop where you use the internet is giving someone on the phone advice using self-help speak. What do you do? Listen to Akimbo. You're at the coffeeshop because you've been looking for several months and still can't find a job, and now you're totally ragin'. What do you do? Why, listen to Akimbo! You're supposed to write a story for a music zine, but it's already late in the week and you haven't done anything. What do you -- oh come on, it's obvious. You write a story about Akimbo.

Clearly, the Seattle hardcore group is appropriate for every occasion. Which means their upcoming tour couldn't come at a better time! They've been around for ten years now, consistently bringing rough and raucous live shows to a venue near you. With five albums on Alternative Tentacles and Seventh Rule under their collective belt, Akimbo is planning to release their latest, Jersey Shores, September 23 on Neurot Recordings. For those of you who are really pumped for the Discovery Channel's upcoming Shark Week, get ready: Jersey Shores is a concept album about a series of vicious shark attacks that terrorized the Jersey coast in 1916. A better and more terrifying end to summer, I cannot imagine.

* Witchcraft (Music Fest North West)

** Iota, Gaza

*** When Dinos Ruled the Earth, The High Cost of Living

***** Cable, Angels Of Meth (members of 27), Eastern Bloodhounds, and Libyans

******Panache Booking CMJ Showcase w/ DMBQ, Monotonix, The Mae Shi, AIDS Wolf, Yip Yip The Homosexuals, Sole, Shellshag, Fiasco, Aa, and more

******* Sweet Cobra, Millions

Headlights, Your Mission – If You Choose To Accept It – Is To Schedule A Tour Without Playing Your Home State Of Illinois. Do You Accept?

Since Headlights formed in 2004, they’ve played the state of Illinois approximately 52 times (according to my research, that is). Granted, they're from Champaign, IL, so it makes sense they would play their home state a fair amount. But still, guys, isn’t it time you cut the cord a bit? Unfortunately, if you notice the tourdates below, you’ll see that Headlights didn’t take me up on my Mission Impossible-themed offer in the headline to tour without playing Illinois. Oh well, there’s always next tour, I suppose.

In the meantime, this news story will self destruct in 3... 2... 1...

! French Kicks

$ Maritime

% Neko Case, Bob Mould

^ Asobi Seksu, The M’s

# Robert Pollard, WHY?

Sony BMG Disbands, Old White Guys Push More Money Around Than You’ll Ever See In Your Life With Giant Rakes

In the wake of the announcement that it lost almost $50 million last year, Sony BMG has officially disbanded. Sony purchased BMG's stake in the venture for $900 million and threw in an additional $300 million of the money that the conglomerate had lying around.

The new music company, dubbed Sony Music Entertainment Inc, is entirely owned by Sony and involves labels such as Arista, Columbia, Epic, Jive and RCA. Upshot: The Bertelsmann group gets over a billion dollars and Sony retains a giant chunk of the increasingly unprofitable music industry.

BMG CEO and apparent PR robot Hartmut Ostrowski had this to say: "The move is consistent with our new growth strategy and will enable us to focus on our defined growth areas. Sony has been an excellent partner, and they are the right company to take this business to the next step and ensure that it realizes its full value and potential."

Good to see Hartmut living the dream. Go for it, man! Focus on those defined growth areas!

Iggy Pop and The Stooges’ Gear Stolen

Crime: Stolen musical equipment, mojo, face

Victims: Iggy Pop, The Stooges, Mike Watt, and the fans

Date of Crime: August 4, 2008, between 6:30 - 7:30 AM

Location: Embassy Suites Hotel - Montreal, Quebec, Canada

Description: "All equipment was in a rented Penske 15 foot yellow truck with U.S. (Michigan) license plate number AC46493."

Website: Stooges Stuff Stolen on August 4, 2008 in Montreal, Quebec

Stolen Gear:

- Red Gibson 1963 EB-3 bass (Mike Watt's bass!!)
- Reverend Flying V guitar - Volcano black USA #08001
- Reverend Orange guitar USA 03416 ZSL7
- Gibson red SG short scale bass
- Gretsch Silver Sparkle Catalina drum kit (26" Kick Drum, 13" Rack Tom, 18" Floor Tom, 4x Cymbal Stands, 1x Snare Stand, 1x Hi Hat Stand, 1x Drum Throne)
- Green clamshell suitcase containing Yamaha snare drum, Yahama kick pedal, Zildjian Mega Bell cymbal, Zildjian 15" Hi-Hats, 3x Zildjian 18" 19" 20" crash medium cymbals
- assorted replacement drum heads

- Marshall Vintage/Modern Amplifier UK M-2007-07-0926-2 RoHS
- Marshall Vintage/Modern Amplifier UK M-2007-07-0927-2 RoHS
- 4x Marshall 4x12 Cabinets (with Tuki cover) UK #1 Slant:
M-2007-05-0149-0
- 4x Marshall 4x12 Cabinets (with Tuki cover) UK #2 Straight:
M-2006-49-0380-0
- 4x Marshall 4x12 Cabinets (with Tuki cover) UK #3 Slant:
M-2007-05-0150-0
- 4x Marshall 4x12 Cabinets (with Tuki cover) UK #4 Straight:
M-2006-49-0381-0
- Eden D810 Bass cabinet USA D810RP4 0703E5001
- Eden D810 Bass cabinet USA D810RP4 0703E5002
- Eden VT300 Bass amplifier USA 0601E5115
- Eden VT300 Bass amplifier USA 0507E5033

- Orange Calzone road case containing guitar pedal board and pedals, assorted leads, 2x mic stands, strings and spares + 2x Boss TU2 Chromatic Tuner, Boss CH1 Super Chorus, Fulltone OCD Overdrive, Crybaby Wah, Peterson Strobo-Stomp Tuner Pedal, Whirlwind A/B Boxes, Whirlwind Cable Tester, and many many istrument cables, various tools (screwdrivers, soldering iron, pliers, etc.), tambourine, and maracas

- two floor fans from China

...

Go to this website for pictures and descriptions. Then help Iggy and The Stooges find their gear, especially the floor fans! Some might argue that they're already going through the motions on this tour -- can you imagine them going through the motions without actual instruments? BORING!

Tourdates up in the air:

People Under The Stairs to Release a BBQ and Beer-Drinking LP this September, Tour

For you hip-hop fans already sick of hearing "A Milli" and "Got Money" at every house party you have been to in the past month (or, for that matter, everywhere you go), the underground hip-hop duo People Under The Stairs is releasing a new album, Fun DMC, this September. Described as "a party record, filled with the sounds of afternoon BBQs and curb-side beer drinking," I'm conjuring images not of PUTS, but of Nelly's video for "Country Grammar" -- but who am I to jump to conclusions?

While an official release date has yet to be announced, PUTS fans be wary if you find a leaked version of Fun DMC before the release date -- the two leaked a fake version of their last release, Stepbrothers, a few months before the actual release.

The duo, made up of Thes Ones and Double K, are also hitting the road to promote the new CD. So for those underground-hip-hop-scensters-- get your tickets soon.

Tourdates (all dates with Flobots):

West Coast dates to follow in September.

Sunn-der the Table and Dreaming: Sunn O))) Plan Anniversary Shows, Dave Matthews Plans to Keep Being Shitty

With the 10th anniversary of their debut recording The Grimmrobe Demos (TMT Review) coming up, Sunn O))) have scheduled four shows for this fall to commemorate its release.

These special anniversary dates will consist entirely of material from that album and will be performed by Stephen O’Malley and Greg Anderson, returning to the duo that started the whole deal in the first place. The band describes the philosophy behind it as an “approach respecting a concept of shoshin, the beginner's mind, the yet undyed pure wool, the clarity in initiation upon the untraveled...” Judging by this quote, it’s hard to tell if they intend to merely recreate the sound of The Grimmrobe Demos or remake it. Either way, this is awesome. Considering how reliant Sunn O))) has been on collaboration over the last several years, not to mention the increasing complexity of their work, it will be interesting to see how they approach this old material.

Experimental artist Tony Conrad will be supplying the ambience at the NY show.

Anniversary dates:
10.10.08 - Los Angeles, CA - Safari Sam’s #
10.12.08 - Portland, OR - Berbatis’ Pan
10.15.08 - New York, NY - Knitting Factory $
10.16.08 - Philadelphia, PA - First Unitarian Church

# John Weise

$ Thou