Vetiver to Release Album of Covers; “Undercover of the Night” Not Included

Conventional wisdom dictates that after a band releases an album they normally do their bit of touring then scurry away from the stage spotlights to write and record a follow-up album. They then commence touring and promotion of said album until another is required (barring any upsets in the pattern: singer leaving for ill-conceived solo career, fatal drug overdoses, etc.). It is the cycle of band life, man, and any deviation from this routine is punishable by donkey kicks to the abdomen.

Vetiver knows that conventional wisdom sux baboons butts. Gnomonsong and FatCat, possibly in association with Doritos, Cheetos, Sun Chips, and Rold Gold (the ORIGINAL “Munchies” party crew, no matter what Bits & Bites and Chex Mix bitches will have you believe) will release the next Vetiver album, Thing of the Past, May 19. While the album comes chronologically after the band's feted To Find Me Gone, it is not exactly a follow-up to that dynamite disc. Joining the ranks of Cat Power and Tiny Tim, the Andy Cabic-led, Devendra Banhart-frequented gang of “freakish” “folkish” hippies have recorded a covers album! Hooray!

Thing of the Past features guest appearances by Vashti Bunyan and Michael Hurley and interpretations of lost classics by Derroll Adams, Bobby Charles, Norman Greenbaum, Hawkwind, Michael Hurley, Garland Jeffreys, Dia Joyce, Ian Matthews, Biff Rose, Townes Van Zandt, Loudon Wainwright III, and Elyse Weinberg. A new Vetiver remix 12-inch is out now, which couples two To Find Me Gone tracks, "You May Be Blue" and "Been So Long," remixed by Neighbors.

1. Houses (Elyse Weinberg)
2. Roll On Babe (Derroll Adams)
3. Sleep a Million Years (Dia Joyce)
4. Hook & Ladder (Norman Greenbaum)
5. To Baby (Biff Rose)
6. Road to Ronderlin (Ian Matthews)
7. Lon Chaney (Garland Jeffreys)
8. Hurry on Sundown (Hawkwind)
9. Swimming Pool (Loudon Wainwright III)
10. Blue Driver (Michael Hurley)
11. Standing (Townes Van Zandt)
12. I Must Be in a Good Place Now (Bobby Charles)

Vetiver will be playing some dates too, don'tcha know, as the opening act and backup band for former Jayhawks front-guy Gary Louris' U.S. tour beginning next week in Denver, as well as some dates with Kelley Stoltz in May.

To find me gone... to these gigs:
03.23.08 - Denver, CO - Bluebird Theater #
03.25.08 - Minneapolis, MN - State Theater #
03.27.08 - Madison, WI - Barrymore Theater (no Vetiver opening set) #
03.28.08 - Chicago, IL - The Vic #
03.29.08 - Pittsburgh, PA - Mr. Small's Theater #
03.30.08 - Toronto, Ontario - Mod Club Theatre #
04.01.08 - Somerville, MA - Somerville Theater #
04.02.08 - New York, NY - Town Hall #
04.03.08 - Washington, DC - State Theater #
04.04.08 - Carrboro, NC - Cat's Cradle #
04.05.08 - Atlanta, GA - Variety Playhouse #
05.01.08 - Sacramento, CA - Harlow’s
05.02.08 - Portland, OR - Roseland Theater Grill $
05.03.08 - Vancouver, British Columbia - Media Club $
05.04.08 - Seattle, WA - High Dive $
05.06.08 - San Francisco, CA - Great American Music Hall %
05.07.08 - Los Angeles, CA - Troubadour ^
05.08.08 - San Diego, CA - The Casbah +
05.09.08 - Santa Cruz, CA - Crepe Place +
05.10.08 - Visalia, CA - Howie & Sons Pizza and Beer Parlor +

# Gary Louris

$ Kelley Stoltz

% Kelley Stoltz and The Mumlers

^ Kelley Stoltz and Jonathan Wilson

+ Jonathan Wilson

Weezer to Release New Album in June; “Beverly Hills” Still Not Meant to Be Ironic

According to a post titled "03/11/08 A Message From Rivers and Weezer," Rivers Cuomo wrote to Weezer fans (who can be considered "punky") and said, "Hey Weezer punks." He went on to say "We have one song left to mix and then it’s on to mastering." He's referring to the band's forthcoming sixth album, by the way. Anyway, after he said that, Rivers said "We should be all done very soon." After that sentence, Rivers finished the paragraph with "Then we chill for a minute."

Rivers then executes a paragraph break and wrote, "The album will be out in June so with any luck you will hear a new Weezer song on the radio soon." The second sentence in this paragraph went on to say "I think I know which song is the first single but I’m not sure so I can’t tell you." Then he starts talking about giving hints about the song: "I’ll give you some hints, though." Then he lays out the hints: "It’s one word, starts with a T, ends with an R and contains twelve letters." He ends the paragraph by saying "You should be able to figure it out because you’re smart li’l Weezer fans."

To finish, Rivers then executes another paragraph break and writes one line: "The album is meaty, crunchy and melodic like a good Weezer album should be." He ends the "03/11/08 A Message From Rivers and Weezer" post by saying "Peace out," line break, and then "Rivera," which TMT has discovered to be referring to his real name, Rivers.

Here's the post in full:

Hey Weezer punks,

We have one song left to mix and then it’s on to mastering. We should be all done very soon. Then we chill for a minute.

The album will be out in June so with any luck you will hear a new Weezer song on the radio soon. I think I know which song is the first single but I’m not sure so I can’t tell you. I’ll give you some hints, though. It’s one word, starts with a T, ends with an R and contains twelve letters. You should be able to figure it out because you’re smart li’l Weezer fans.

The album is meaty, crunchy and melodic like a good Weezer album should be.

Peace out,


Producer Scotty Hard Partially Paralyzed from Car Accident; Antibalas, Bill Laswell, and More Confirmed for Benefit Show

Last month, Scott Harding (a.k.a. Scotty Hard), hip-hop/jazz producer/engineer who has worked with artists such as De La Soul, Black Sheep, and Medeski Martin & Wood, was involved in a car accident that crushed his vertebrae, leaving him partially paralyzed. Like many artists living in the U.S., Harding has no health insurance and is "facing large medical and legal fees," according to a press release from CrystalTop.

Harding now needs cash as quickly as possible. Through The Scotty Hard Trust, you can donate money through PayPal or direct mail; you can even donate an item to be auctioned.

Additionally, a benefit show has been setup for March 19, with a confirmed lineup including Antibalas, John Medeski, Billy Martin, John Scofield, DJ Logic, Bill Laswell, and more, taking place at The Highline Ballroom in New York. 100% of proceeds will go directly to The Scotty Hard Trust. Click here for more information.

Alright everyone, let's show our support!

Spiritualized have sold billions of Ladies and Gentlemen We Are Floating in Space. Clinic are easily the most well-known group from Liverpool. The Beta Band have signed endorsement deals with Coors, Sprint, and Gap. Stephen Malkmus has a beautiful Swarovski collection. The members of Supergrass are owned by Waner Music Group (but are signed to EMI). Sigur Rós are official members of NATO. Four Tet are #208 in Forbes' Platinum 400 (The Best Big Companies in America). And Sparklehorse, well... they're probably successful, too.

So, what do these artists have in common? Radiohead. All of them have opened for Radiohead, and now all of them are enjoying success in this beautiful capitalist world in which we have no other choice but to live because it's all-consuming, horizontally-spread, and embedded in the very fabric of global commerce. And now, word has it that Liars are next in line for endorsement deals, big bucks, and... um... political in·ex′·tri·cabil′·ity? Having released a self-titled album (TMT Review) last August and the Yorke-triply-approved Drum's Not Dead (TMT Review) in 2006, Liars are set to jam out their tunes before Radiohead hit the stage to also jam out their tunes.

Let's just hope Liars aren't traveling in that Mercedes-Benz G-Class luxury SUV still.

Underworld are rumored to be opening for the yet-to-be-announced August North American dates, and Radiohead might be playing South America for the first time, with possible dates in Japan.

Dates with Liars:

Free Dates:
04.01.08 - London, England - BBC's Radio Theatre (Radio 2)
04.06.08 - London, England - BBC's Radio Theatre (BBC 6 Music)

White Rabbits Sign to Radiohead’s U.S. Label, TBD Records; Label Becomes Target of an Illegal Prostitution Ring

Hot off the release of last year's Fort Nightly, White Rabbits have recently been inducted into the hall of "Not a Bad Place to Be" when the indie-cock rockers got signed as the sole labelmates of Radiohead on TBD Records. In case you've been incarcerated (haha) or weren't born yet (teehee), TBD Records is Radiohead's U.S. label. Sweet ass buffalo tits, huh?

Now, I'm sure White Rabbits didn't get the job solely based on their gifts from God. Maybe Radiohead saw their energetic performance on Letterman and recommended them? Maybe it's because they are snazzy dressers? Either way, White Rabbits will be working on a new release for 2009. Meanwhile, they'll be testing out their laser eyes on a big-ass U.S. tour with Spoon and The Walkmen.

Radiohead White Rabbits tourdates:

* Spoon , The Walkmen

# Lonely, Dear, Guilemotts Soko

Whoa! This just in: TBD has been discovered by the Feds to be an illegal prostitution ring! When asked to comment, Radiohead members exclaimed, "We thought it was a legal prostitution ring." (The Feds also reported that Yorke and Greenwood had a combined man mass of 27 units. In laymen's terms, they have big dicks.) Silly Radiohead.

Donate Sperm for European Festival Tickets!

UPDATE: Like a lot of things in life, this deal was too good (great?) to be true. Alas, the people at Sperm for Tickets have posted an "Urgent Update," claiming the "purpose of [their] website was to test market interest through a pilot scheme." They go on to say that "applications for donation packs have far exceed the expectations" and are now "calling a halt to the invitation to apply for packs, and will review the results of the scheme to decide on how to proceed." My recommendation? Squeeze out the juice you've been saving up, because who knows what'll result from Sperm for Tickets' pilot/publicity scheme/bullshit.


- Do you live in Europe?
- Do you masturbate often?
- Are you male and proud of your sperm?
- Do you want tickets to a European music fest?

If you answered yes to these questions, then Ireland and you should totally get in touch, because it has the goods if you have the man juice! Why and how you ask?

Well, Ireland is currently in a state of code red when it comes to sperm donations, and it's running out of current cum supplies faster than it can fill the demand. So, now Ireland needs you to grab your member and jack off into a special cup that'll keep your seeds fresh for three days while you ship them via UPS or DHL! A fuckin' modern marvel!

And what do you get out of this (besides an orgasm)? Well, Sperm For Tickets will provide you with tickets to any European festival of your choice! That's right: jizz for tickets. Pretty dope deal, right? Well, be warned: your sperm will go through some pretty rigorous tests to make sure you don't have any impurities -- you know, from that girl you hooked up with after that Girl Talk show last April.

A Mini-Story Regarding Four Tet’s Forthcoming Mini-LP

Four Tet’s coming out with a new record. It’s only four tracks. It’s shorter than usual, and apparently unusually reliant on basic 4/4 beats. It’s coming out May 6. The press release calls it “techno (not techno),” and I don’t know what that means. God Bless.

Mudhoney Still Touring, Kurt Cobain Still Dead

Dude! Dude, Travis, wake up, man. It's Dan!

Right, like, I knooooow we haven't really hung out in a while and stuff, but like...

No man, I know. It's cool. I'm sorry about your sister, but man, just listen!

Yeah, you'd better put away that taped-off-of-TV VHS of the Kurt Cobain segment on Unsolved Mysteries and call your boss down at the BP and tell him you won't be in for a while, cuz, dude, your favorite band Mudhoney is hitting the road again this spring and summer in support of... umm... well, in support of nothing really (except maybe their habits), but come on! MUUUUDHONEY, bro!

What do you mean, "You don't think so?!?!" What's the prob? Gas up the Ford Tempo, grab a few CDs for your dash-mounted Sony Discman, and let's hit it! Yeah! Waaaaayne's Wooooorld! Waaaaaayne's Woooooorld! Paaarty tiiii... hey, remember???

Still no, huh?

Bill Passed, Justice Secured; Team America Okays Intellectual Property Act, Instantaneously Halting All Subversive Pirate Activity Worldwide

U.S. House of Representatives, those mighty elected representatives of the people, the powers that be, have battered their little gravels in a cacophonist chorus with such discrepant cries as "ASDKJAFDLKJ, YARRR!" And Hallelujah for that.

Presented with the Prioritizing Resources and Organization for Intellectual Property Act (PRO IP Act, HR 4279) earlier this week -- the bill originally called for a penalty of $30,000 per track (setting the fine of downloading Janet Jackson's 22 track Discipline at a total of $660,000), far exceeding the current maximum damages of $30,000 per compilation -- the Representatives in the house (what what, represent!) unanimously voted to amend the bill by throwing their hands in the air like the roof was on fire (they didn't need no water; let the motherfucker burn!) keeping the current $30,000 maximum compilation fine intact. Which will only set you back, say, a Honda Civic rather than the value of your entire life at a part-time minimum wage job.


But really, I think the amendment was made in hoping to curb the temptation of shitty, on-the-downhill artists from prompting people to download their albums and then BLAM! Hitting them up for $660 grand, figuring that's a hell of a lot more than they would have made if you'd actually bought it at Wal-Mart.

"Whether it is still prudent to limit statutory damages when multiple works on a compilation have been infringed is a topic of ongoing conversations and subject matter for another day," said House Judiciary Committee Chairman John Conyers.

Sixty pages later, the PRO IP Act stipulates far more than maximum financial penalties. Ambiguous powers are to be extended to federal officials for the purpose of confiscating property, "including computer equipment used to commit intellectual property crimes or obtained as a result of those proceeds." Furthermore, officials will have the power to publicly humiliate criminals by tying them naked to a whipping pole in public, condemning them to hell, and executing the Raiders Of The Lost Ark-style heart-being-ripped-out-of-your-chest move, which they don't get to do very often these days.

But don't let that worry you. House officials say stipulations won't be so ambiguous as to target wholly innocent individuals. In fact, for any such fate to befall you, there would have to be substantial evidence linking the property/individual to the offense. You know, rather than dolling out the punishment because they kinda sorta think you might have maybe done it.

The bill will also create a Pirate-Busting taskforce, WHIPER (the White House Intellectual Property Enforcement Representative), the head of which will be the "president's principal adviser and spokesman for intellectual property matters."

"With this vote, Congress has taken the first legislative step toward enacting a common sense bill that closes needless loopholes in the copyright laws and provides more resources to the federal government and law enforcement to fully address intellectual property theft," says Mitch Glazier, RIAA executive VP of government and industry relations. "This is great news for the music community and all businesses that rely upon intellectual property laws."

Which means bad news for everyone else.

Nine Inch Nails’ $1.6 Million in First-Week Sales Amounts to 28¢ Per Volume?

Unlike Radiohead, who keep their lined pockets relatively hidden from public view, Nine Inch Nails want the world to know how much their industry-subverting shenanigans are worth. How? With a press release, of course. Including paid (and free) downloads and physical orders, Ghosts I-IV received 781,917 transactions, pulling in $1,619,420, according to a press release.

But if my calculations are right, this makes the average transaction roughly $2.07. Even more interesting is that if you minus the 2,500 "Ultra-Deluxe" versions that accounted for $750,000 of the total (and sold out within 24 hours), the remaining average price becomes roughly $1.12 per transaction. AND, if we take the average $1.12 per transaction price and spread it over four volumes (under the assumption that knowing the overall average per-volume price is even desirable), well, it amounts to about 28¢ -- 52¢ if you factor in the deluxe versions. Never mind the fact that these figures already ignore any costs involved.

HOWEVER (bum, bum, bummmm, etc), $1.6 million is $1.6 million, and NIN surely made more out of this than if they had released it through a major label. And while the per-transaction/volume average is pretty small when dissected like this, this is just first-week sales. The $10 2xCD set will be released physically in April, and the vinyl fetishists will get their chance then too. Obviously, Ghosts has to contend with the fact that all four versions (not just volume one) are now being shared free of charge, but as of now, hardcore NIN fans are happy, the casual NIN fans are happy, the curious music fans are happy, and NIN must be happy too: they just pulled in $1.6 million on a four-volume instrumental album. The only people unhappy are the industry heads who don't get a cut.

This is a little off-topic, and maybe it's due to my age, but whatever happened to the romantic idea of the starving artist? Am I the only one who wants to see these artists starve?