Attention loyal lady TMTers:
Is it just me, or has your sex kinda... dropped the ball lately??
No, no, no! Put that down! Just, just hear me out, okay?! Sheesh...
Anyway, what I mean is, when's the last time you really took a stand and struck a blow for women's rights? When's the last time you've welled up with a passion for change, looked male tyranny straight in the monocled-eye, and shouted "I am woman, hear me roar"?? When's the last time you really listened to Meredith Brooks' "Bitch"???
Well, ladies, break out the picket signs and Kate Chopin, because now's your chance.
See, there's this certain social club, a dirty, vile little group that consists of -- get THIS -- all male members! And, by all accounts, they stubbornly refuse to let any women join in the eerily masculine, cult-like noise-making rituals in which I am told they participate almost nightly, as they spread their gospel of segregation and tyranny around different parts of the United States.
This "band," as the sexist menace cleverly refers to itself, audaciously calls itself Man Man, presumably in order to rub your delicate, feminine noses in the fact that these mysterious perverts revel in their archaic male-exclusivity.
Oh, and also get THIS: they hail from none other than the male-centric City of Philadelphia, a.k.a. "the city of brotherly love!" Coincidence? I HIGHLY doubt it! Who do these woman-supplicating crackpots think they’re fooling, am I right?
I said, AM I RIGHT?!?
But, oh, it gets worse, ladies! This Man Man group has been known to jet set around the country, playing all manner of shows in nothing but boxer shorts and t-shirts, as if to say "We have a new record coming out April 8 called Rabbit Habbits! It’s our debut on Anti- Records, home of such decidedly monosyllabic male artists as Tom Waits and Nick Cave! And there's nothing you can do about it, bitches!"
The bastards! And that is why I encourage each and every one of you to get out there to the following headlining tourdates and, amid the pulverisingly gleeful Klezmer din that is a Man Man show, dance the dance of protest!
Er, I’d go myself and join in the picketing, ladies, but there’s no Chicago date. Uh, but don’t you worry your pretty face about it; I’ll be at home rooting for you with every ounce of my body... my inherently biologically superior male body.
A story in three parts...
It was a typical boring day at my job. I was ignoring the office work I was supposed to be doing, opting instead to peruse through the latest music news online. I clicked onto a website and noticed the words “British Sea Power” and “Tour” together in the same sentence. Gasp, could it be true?!?!?
Before I could glance upon the desired tourdates to see if my city had made the cut, a voice boomed behind me. With a cry, I jumped up in my chair, startled at the interruption. I fumbled, desperately trying to close my internet browser in time, worried that whoever had come up behind me would see that I was not doing work and browsing the internet instead.
“Anna,” the voice repeated. I swiveled quickly around, expecting to see my boss or at least a fellow co-worker. Instead, Yan, the singer/guitarist of British Sea Power stared down at me. “Do you like rock music?” I nervously swallowed and quickly nodded. “Do you like live rock music?” I nodded again. “Then buy our new album, Do You Like Rock Music? and go see us on tour!” Yan said, his British accent echoing in my cubicle. He watched my confused expression and spoke again, “I know what you’re thinking, Anna, and yes, your city made the cut.” “But how did you know I live in Chicago?” I asked him. “We’re all in it, and we close our eyes,” Yan mystically said, quoting lyrics from his band’s own new album. And with his words still hanging in the air, he walked away.
Do You Like Rock Music? (TMT Review) came out this past Tuesday in the UK and will be released February 12 in the U.S. via Rough Trade/World’s Fair.
We’re All In It:
George Clinton and the P-Funk All Stars to go to Chico State and reenact that scene from PCU when The Pit throws that house party and George Clinton shows up and plays that huge concert for all the drunk college co-eds, making the world right again.
The savior of stoned college students worldwide, I have to shake my head at the number of hipsters who have never jived to the purity of such George Clinton staples as Electric Spanking of Warbabies, Hardcore Jollies, Testing Positive 4 The Funk, and Free Your Mind And Your Ass Will Follow. There's no feigning ignorance here. Those album titles are stellar, and if you're one who makes albums with stellar titles your business, P Funk should be your P Diddy.
George Clinton and the P Funk All Stars (a veritable army of funk), have been touring for something like five years now, fueled by a drug diet that would put Hunter S. Thompson and The Grateful Dead combined to shame. But no cause for embarrassment -- I understand. At Georgie's golden age of 66, it's hard to stay funky past midnight without a little *sniff sniff* help. That said, the All Stars are geared up and ready to go 24/7/365, and your $70 ticket (which split 30 ways between everyone in the band really doesn't add up to much) helps them to keep going and going and going.
Get down with your bad self:
With the idea of being signed to a label becoming more about access to distribution and marketing and less a necessary step in fame, it's nice to see artists like Daniel Johnston and his family doing fine ‘n’ dandy by essentially self-releasing tunes on his own label, Eternal Yip Eye Music. With the exception of Fun, his only release on (possibly evil) major label Atlantic, Johnston had by the end of 2007 reacquired the masters for all of his music, including those released on Gammon, Shimmy Disc, and Trikont. Could this mean a reissue of 1990 or even Don't Be Scared (TMT Review) on vinyl? MAYBE!
Johnston plans to add even more to his already hefty discography -- not just in the coming months, but in the coming years. Dude's got foresight, that's for sure. Having recently reissued Hi, How Are You and Yip/Jump Music on vinyl, Johnston will finally release Lost and Found February in the U.S. (it was previously only available in the UK). According to Johnston's publicist, there are also "several completed albums which will be released over the next few years," including one major work in which Johnston will collaborate with "several major producers and artists." Originally intended for release this year, the new album is now slated for release early 2009.
Meanwhile, Daniel Johnston is set to hit the road in February, presumably in time for the U.S. release of Lost and Found. Live appearances are never wholly predictable for Johnston, so you should take advantage (TMT Live Review)! You can bet your sweet smellhole I'll be at one of these shows.
Jay Reatard Headlines In Chicago, Tours In Australia, Comes Back For SXSW, Opens For The Black Keys, Releases Six 7”s On Matador, Plans Reissues, And Will Still Die One Day
02.22.08 - Chicago, IL - Reggie's Rock Club
It was the night of broken glass, it was the night of broken glass, it was the first but it's not the last:
$$$ Black Keys
These were the nights of broken glass. AND I duh nuh nuh nuh nuh NUH, nuh nuh, nuh... etc.
So, like, what are YOU doing during Spring Break this year?
Well, if you were as much of an untouchably vicious party animal as Kim Deal and her partners-in-promiscuity The Breeders are, you'd be, like, tearing shit up old-school style with a 10-day booze cruise across the most notoriously sunny, sensuously tropical, and outrageously sexy group of islands the north hemisphere has to offer: the fabulous United Kingdom!
Awww yeeeah, dudes and dudettes, you heard it here foist! Those illimitable party animals The Breeders have announced they will be, like, totally down for thumping your tub again in April when they tour Ireland and the UK in support of the recently announced new album Mountain Battles, which is, of course, due April 7 via 4AD (TMT News).
So, if you wanna be where the cool kids are this spring, pick out that new bathing suit, dust off that gym membership card, and get to that campus-town tanning salon, cuz this party's startin' on April 7! Oh, and, uh, you might want to go ahead and start that crash diet now... I didn't want to say anything...
Hey Grammys! Writers Guild Might Picket. Whites Stripes Might Boycott. Kanye West Might Cry. And Fergie Might Pass a Kidney Stone.
The Writers Guild Checklist:
Golden Globes - Check
Oscars - Check
Grammys - Boo-yah!
As a lover of music, like 99% of the U.S. (excluding Mr. McNabbit next door to me -- he's a grump!), I was appalled over hearing the news that the Writers Guild of America ("entertainment terrorists") might picket the glorious Grammys.
The 50th annual Grammy Awards are scheduled to air February 10 on CBS, live from Staples Center in Los Angeles. If the WGA decides to picket the show, celebrity attendance could possibly, maybe be lowered down nearly 99% (except for Mr. McNabbit, my next door neighborhood -- he goes every year, but he is no celebrity), which may in fact result in a cancellation of the ceremony.
Many artists are already saying they will join the unstable bandwagon of the WGA by boycotting what many consider "the only thing that matters in musical acceptance and success." The White Stripes, Beyonce, 50 Cent, and Jon Bon Jovi top the list of performers who say, "No, I won't be a scab."
Other performers who threaten to boycott include, Prince, Justin Timberlake, Alicia Keys, Nelly Furtado, Tim McGraw, Kelly Clarkson, Fergie, and American Idol winner Fantastic Burrito.
Amy Winehouse, for whatever reason, is confirmed her appearance. And nowhere on that non-scab list did I see U2 or Kanye West. You know why? Because they're all true American heroes. West worked his penis off making an acclaimed pop/rap record that had no skits or interlude crap. What more could one ask for? So, if you have a problem with the Grammys, you screenwriters, I suggest you remind yourself that you will be offending the likes of U2, a.k.a. the band in which God plays.
It was also rumored that Fergie was scheduled to perform, which would involve her mustering up a soon-to-be-titled mineral secretion in her urinary tract. This just in: Fergie will name the kidney stone after her true birth name, Keith. Do you really want us, the true music fans, to miss out on the chance of seeing Fergie give birth to her true male self?
On the other hand, I would love to see ol' Mr. McNabbit denied a chance to go to his favorite award show. I hate that guy.
Radiohead have been forced at the last minute to change the venue for their free London show from the Rough Trade East record shop to the adjoining venue, 93 Feet East.
On the advice of the police and the local council, it was decided to change the venue to the larger one in the interests of public safety and due to the size of the crowd that turned up for the event. Rough Trade and the band apologise for any inconvenience caused.
Allocated wristbands only remain valid for the new venue. Doors open at 9pm prompt. There will be no admittance to anyone without a wristband and there will be no screens or speakers outside the venue - however the show will still be webcast from www.radiohead.tv!
I love when things are done in the name of "public safety." Anyway, this second post is really just for those of you who can actually go to the concert. See how we try so hard to please every one of our readers?
They said it couldn’t be done, but they were wrong. Yes, kids, I decided to play the Six Degrees of Separation game, and I managed to connect Nada Surf to Batman. Yes, Batman! No, seriously, look:
- Nada Surf performed on The CW TV show, One Tree Hill.
- “Actor” Chad Michael Murray is on said TV show.
- Murray used to be on Dawson’s Creek.
- And so was Katie Holmes.
- Katie Holmes starred in Batman Begins.
- ...which is about Batman!
In other news, I know too much about shitty teenage TV dramas and Nada Surf are touring this spring in support of their fifth album, Lucky, which is set for release February 5 on Barsuk.
I heard Batman is totally going to the Gotham City date:
* The Little Ones
& What Made Milwaukee Famous
Xiu Xiu have been crafting genre-defying music for eight years now, and as with other bands that have survived that long, their lineup has changed numerous times. Currently, Jamie Stewart shares the stage/studio with his cousin Caralee McElroy and percussionist Ches Smith. The group's sixth album, Women As Lovers comes out January 29, and they'll be touring soon after to support it.
All that dribble about them is all well and good, but did you know Xiu Xiu's MySpace is experiencing major spikes in traffic? It's true. The page serves as a home to completely relevant, highly revealing comments that offer insight into the community that keeps Xiu Xiu afloat. What phenomenal psychological gems will we find by reading through the comments? Let's take a look.
- "i'm so amped for your show @ the bowery ballroom... i'm so anxious for it.... abczxcgu823jmkdfjia!!!" - the damage is done
- "thank you. seriously your music!! *swoony swoon* and you're amazing live i'm not sure how two people can make that much sound. i can't wait to see you again(with deerhoof?). caralee when you sing your little song it is devastatingly adorable. and ooh a new album!" - laurel
- "heck it out!... i just got myself a free apple iphone from a website...i didn't believe i would get it free at first, but it worked! you just enter your zip code and they send you the iphone, FREE. mine came in the mail today. i saved the website address for you.. just goto http://grooviniphones.com and get yours before they are all gone!" - karmen
- "i love you. you're so emotional and wild and i hope you never change.... i think you should do an entire album about feminism. i actually buy your music from the music store. i swear." - xani
Good commentary and an exciting glimpse into the psyche of the average Xiu Xiu fan! Too bad these users are confused, as the MySpace they are posting on is called /xiuxiuband and the real page is /xiuxiuforlife. Confusing I know. What the fuck Xiu Xiu and Xiu Xiu fans? So far it seems the only awesome thing about the http://www.myspace.com/xiuxiuforlife page is that you can stream Women As Lovers from it. Ya!
You'll see "laurel," "the damage is done," "xani," "karmen," and tons of other rad Xiu Xiu fans at the dates below:
Oh, and check out the cover of the new XLR8R!