Do You Like The Sonic Youth You’ve Heard, But Find Yourself Thurston For Moore? Quench That At Your Local Starbucks June 10

Get it?

Anyway, you didn’t misread that -- Sonic Youth’s music will soon be sold in Starbucks. Total legends and creators of the now-ironic “The Sprawl,” Sonic Youth have teamed up with the coffee monolith’s entertainment division to create Hits are For Squares, a compilation of tracks from throughout their career, along with the recently recorded “Slow Revolution” as a bonus. And it has a cover:

It’s difficult to overstate Sonic Youth’s importance to the history of independent music, but album collaborator Eddie Vedder made an attempt: "From my experience nothing gets you going like putting on ‘Teenage Riot’ at full volume... 0 to 60, standing still... Play it twice and you will have cleaned the house and shoveled the walk. In a car you'll find yourself doing 95 and getting pulled over before the first chorus." Also cheaper than snorting a 30 mg Adderall every morning.

But I digress. Once the initial shock has been absorbed, it doesn’t seem like the end of the world. Equal or worse transactions take place every day without a fuss, and Coco’s college ain’t payin’ for itself. Those of you in New York, Los Angeles, Chicago, San Francisco, Seattle, Boston, Philadelphia or Washington, D.C. can buy the album in stores; otherwise, check The Starbucks Entertainment Website.

P.S. The entire tracklist was chosen by celebrities, but when Barack Obama, Holden Caulfield, and the movie Garden State were unavailable, the group was forced to look elsewhere for input. Check it:

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