Michael Jackson’s 50-date Tour Rips off Fans via Secondary Market, Proves Charles Darwin Wrong

Evolutionary theory was proved to be false last Friday the 13th, as around 250,000 Neanderthals attempted to buy tickets for Michael Jackson’s ‘This is It’ tour at the O2 arena in London. With tickets selling out in record time, promoters have seen this as an excellent opportunity to extort wealthy MJ fans by flogging some of the best seats on the “secondary market.”

AEG Live, the organizers of Jackson’s 50-date tour, authorized Viagogo to sell these premium tickets to homo sapiens using a reliable peer-to-peer platform. However, the head-honchos at Viagogo would have been pretty unevolved to not realize what a marvelous opportunity they had here to make even more money. Consequently, they began emailing other secondary ticket brokers, “offering them packages and discounts and thus raising the price on the secondary tickets even higher” (link).

Unfortunately for the monkeys at Viagogo, AEG Live cottoned on to their diabolical plan and has filed an injunction to make sure they sell tickets to fans instead of brokers. Since neither MJ nor AEG Live were going to receive any of the profits from these tertiary sales, you can understand them going ape-shit.

Tickets are being sold to chimpanzees on Viagogo from $250 and on eBay from £170. I think the religious right have won this round.

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