Nickelback’s Chad Kroeger, The Folk Hero, Gets Served

Justice has finally been served. Not in the sense that justice has been delivered, but in the way Stan and his friends got served by a neighboring dance crew. Let's tip the scales, shall we?

Chad Kroeger, the banal growling frontman of Nickelback, was pulled over by the Canadian authorities at the typically suitable time of 2 AM on June 22, 2006. He was driving his $175,000 Lamborghini at estimated speeds of over 160 km/h (or 100 mp/h). Naturally, given the hour of the incident, he stank of booze and prompted a breathalyser test. His blood alcohol level was twice the legal limit. Chad pled not guilty anyway.

By some small miracle of faith, the court didn't go for the innocence plea and sentenced Kroeger with the harshest of penalties. On May 2, He received a $600 fine and a suspended license for a whole year. $600 wouldn't even buy a floor mat from the car he was driving, yet he still plans on appealing the ruling.

I mean, how could he ever afford a chauffeur? It's not like his band hasn't sold some 30 million albums or anything. I would hope if this happened in the U.S., the police would at least have the decency to drag him out the car by his curly mullet and curb stomp him against his diamond encrusted hubcaps untill he sobered up enough to be thrown in jail. He deserves nothing less than the star treatment, after all.

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