The scene is a dimly lit interview room. A mild-mannered son of a doctor sits across from a police officer with a short fuse and a lonely wife. “Alright, let’s cut to the chase, kid. Where did you hide The Body? I’m a police officer with a short fuse and a lonely wife, so don’t try to mess with me.” The mild-mannered son of a doctor replies, “I ain’t a murderer, sir, that’s the god’s honest! I’m just the mild-mannered son of a doctor, and last I heard The Body weren’t even hidden! They signed to Thrill Jockey back in May and they’re planning to release Christs, Redeemers on October 15. You… you can preorder it now if you want!”
The police officer with the short fuse and the lonely wife slams his hands on the metal table and stands up. He’s heard this line before from countless other sons and daughters of doctors, lawyers, and bakers. He knows full well about The Body, about their sludgy, doomy, Portland-based ways. He knows too that this mild-mannered son of a doctor isn’t telling him everything he knows. The police officer stares down the mild-mannered son — good cop beaming out of his right eye, and bad cop coming out the left. The mild-mannered son of a doctor stammers as he continues, “Okay okay! Look, I’ll talk! I heard… I heard they’re going on tour this fall.” The dates tumble out of his mouth like refreshing diet soda. A ha! The mild-mannered son of a doctor doesn’t know it yet, but he’s given the game away.
The police officer pulls out a tablet computer and slides it across the table as it plays the recently released video for “An Altar or A Grave” from Christs, Redeemers. “You wouldn’t know anything about this, would you, son?” As the mild-mannered son of a doctor watches the video, descriptors like “murky,” “disturbing,” and “difficult to visually interpret” flash across his face, but he doesn’t speak. The officer repeats his question, to which the son replies, “No. No. No, sir. I don’t know nothing about this video. Honest!” After a pause, the officer looks satisfied. He says, “Alright, get out of here, and don’t let me catch you down at Musclehead Johnny’s again… By the way, could you let your dad know that I’ll probably be by later in the week. I think I’ve got a parasite thing going on that I’d like him to take a look at.”
Dates:
10.15.13 - San Francisco, CA - Thee Parkside
10.16.13 - Arcata, CA - Mex n’ Wow
10.17.13 - Portland, OR - The Know
10.19.13 - Seattle, WA - The Highline
10.23.13 - Minneapolis, MN - Hexagon *
10.24.13 - Chicago, IL - The Empty Bottle @
10.25.13 - Milwaukee, WI - Riverwest Free Space
10.26.13 - Columbus, OH - The Summit
10.27.13 - Pittsburgh, PA - The Shop
10.29.13 - Philadelphia, PA - Kung Fu Necktie #
10.30.13 - Providence, RI - Machines With Magnets
10.31.13 - Brooklyn, NY - Saint Vitus
11.03.13 - New Orleans, LA - The Mushroom
11.04.13 - Baton Rouge, LA - Spanish Moon
11.05.13 - Little Rock, AR - Whitewater Tavern
11.10.13 - Phoenix, AZ - Wall St.
11.12.13 - San Diego, CA - The Soda Bar $
11.13.13 - Santa Monica, CA - Almost Heaven
11.23.13 - Portland, OR - Roseland Theater %
* False
@ Oozing Wound
# Pissgrave, Krieg, Drums Like Machine Guns
$ Author and Punisher, Diamond Lakes
% Neurosis, Tragedy, Atriarch
• The Body: http://www.facebook.com/pages/the-body/334047229514
• Thrill Jockey: http://www.thrilljockey.com
More about: The Body
