Death Grips subvert conventional notions of fall tours by cancelling the shit out of theirs

Death Grips subvert conventional notions of fall tours by cancelling the shit out of theirs

Damn, Death Grips, how’d you get so goddamn good at this shit??? I mean, let’s face it: most bands have NO IDEA how to be assholes. They just seem to go around faking it: biting chickens’ heads off and kissing one another and saying inane shit about guns and politics and playing “My Sharona” over and over again at live shows and, I don’t know, BEING Lars Ulrich or whatever. You guys seem to just roll out of bed, and BAM! controversial records! BAM! No-show at the after-party! Etc. etc. I tell ya, these guys do it right.

And now, according to a recent Fun Fun Fun Fest Facebook post (at which the Grips were scheduled to “appear” in some shirtless capacity on their upcoming fall tour), they’ve gone and just CANCELLED THAT ENTIRE FALL TOUR. BAM! FTW! It’s like: that’ll teach all you music-lovin’ motherfuckers to be so lame and typical in your lame-ass enjoyment of music! NO FUN FOR ANYONE! PISS IN YR BEER! DO NOT PASS GO; INSTEAD, GET CANCER. How DO they DO that??? Maybe it’s all the caps lock?

Anyway, as for the festival slot itself, apparently No Age will be filling in for them. Which… is cool and all, but I’d kinda rather they fly Death Grips’ equipment out there anyway so the fans can just smash it up for a while, wouldn’t you? Then again… they’d probably just find some way to SUBVERT THE FUCK OUT OF THAT TOO. I know I would if I ruled as hard as Death Grips do.

Or DO they?

OR DON’T THEY?!?!

FUCK YOU.

• Death Grips: http://thirdworlds.net

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