Expect Sweat, Crack, and Maybe a Boner: Har Mar Superstar Announces Tour

Ever since I was a little boy, I've had the same dream. And yet, at my current age, I can still only recall bits and pieces of this recurring vision. The single image that stands out, fully visualized, is of course the most mystifying: I’m in a dark bar, neon lights glowing brightly, the sound of laughter and the clink of glasses filling my ears. Lights suddenly illuminate a small stage, and the audible pop of a microphone being inserted into an amp shocks me into awareness. My eyes remain fixated on the stage.

A man enters the spotlight; his skin is covered in thick, sweaty hair, barely covered by clothes. He gazes voluptuously and eagerly into the crowd, giving us all a quick glance. The music starts, slow and populated by bass notes, smooth like silk and as bracingly refreshing as an ice-cold shower in the middle of a Minnesota winter. His hips begin to gyrate and he slides across the stage, brushing my cheek with his index finger. Whatever clothes remain quickly find their place on the stage floor, and right before his engorged member is removed from the too-tight and bright purple undies... I wake up.

Now, I know that you could find a bounty of subliminal thoughts and desires attempting to make themselves known, but all I know for certain is that my dreams want me to go see Har Mar Superstar. Which is convenient, because he actually just announced a fall tour! Hot on the heels of the announcement of a new album, Har Mar has just now supplied us with details on the whereabouts and times for a bevy of shows.

Hey, don’t leave yet! The deluge of HMS news doesn’t stop there. Mr. Superstar also has a video for “Tall Boy” (a song that Har Mar wrote for Britney Spears) coming out soon that is directed by and featuring Eric Wareheim (of Tim and Eric Awesome Show, Great Job!). Wareheim provided a little insight into the project: “Every night I was falling asleep I would pray to Zeus, ‘Please let me be slimed by Har Mar. Please let his tasty blue jizzism engulf my face.’ As you can see, my fantasy became a reality on this shoot.” Looking forward to it.

Here be dates (more TBA for October and November):
09.26.09 - Pioneertown, CA - Pappy & Harriets Palace
10.06.09 - San Diego, CA - Casbah
10.08.09 - Los Angeles, CA - The Echo (record release show)
10.09.09 - Santa Barbara, CA - Sand Bar (New Noise Santa Barbara Festival)
10.10.09 - Oakland, CA - The Uptown
10.12.09 - Salt Lake City, UT - Club Vegas
10.13.09 - Denver, CO - Hi-Dive
10.14.09 - Albuquerque, NM - Launch Pad
10.15.09 - Austin, TX - Emo's (inside show)
10.16.09 - Dallas, TX - Lounge on Elm Street
10.17.09 - Houston, TX - Super Happy Fun Land
10.21.09 - Atlanta, GA - The Drunken Unicorn

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