For shame, Olympics, for shame. Meanwhile, expect yet another American artist to lip-sync at the Super Bowl next year. My money is on the Jonas Brothers.
Lip-Synching Singer Exposed At Olympic Opening Ceremonies; Producers Decided On New Girl Because Original Singer Wasn’t “Flawless In Image”
Baltimore Round Robin: Just Like Summer Sanitarium or the Family Values Tour, Only With Shutter Shades and Neon Dunks
You don’t really see it too much anymore — large groups of bands hitting the road together that aren’t tied to a festival, like Warped Tour or Lollapalooza. It’s probably because touring is a pain in the ass and gas is ridonkulous. Some DIY labels still do it, mostly punk or hardcore labels. Anyway, a bunch of bands from Baltimost are hitting the road for the Baltimore Round Robin Tour. Here is the scoop.
The tour runs from early-October till mid-October and features 29 bands. Apparently, the “Round Robin” part of the tour title is literal — all the bands set up at the same time around the perimeter of the venue with the audience in the center. Each band plays one song per round, back-to-back. There are no breaks and no headliners. I imagine it's like the dance circles in Breakin’ and Breakin’ 2: Electric Boogaloo, but in reverse.
Expect similar attire at the Baltimore Round Robin.
The festival is “curated” by Dan Deacon and includes bands from various Baltimore music families representing Wham City, Floristree, Tarantula Hill, The Bank, Comfort Dome, among others. Performers include Dan Deacon, obviously, along with Beach House, Video Hippos WZT Hearts, The Deathset, Nautical Almanac, Double Dagger, and more. They’re also traveling green in veggie-powered vehicles with all 60+ musicians. I bet that shit is gonna get gamey.
You’ll also notice there are two shows in each city. Well, the first night, “Eyes Night,” is folk, noise, theatrics, improv, and “music that is spiritual, dreamy.” The second night, “Feet Night,” is a mixture of electronic, punk hardcore, dance, and rock. The tour is only hitting a few cities, mostly on the East coast. They also note that “like-up is subject to change”, which means someone probably couldn’t get out of their dish shift at Holy Frijoles.
Baltimore Round Robin Tour:
No Age will be touring this fall and will probably have difficulty purchasing alcohol because of their agelessness, but I’m not gonna be the one who gets it for them because that’s gotten me in trouble too many times.
I’m just not doing it anymore. Too many parents calling me complaining about “oh you dared my kid he couldn’t drink a whole thing of beers and now he’s in some kinda coma” or whatever bull. You try to be a cool dude in this world, and look where it gets you. It’s like Billie Joe Armstrong said, man: nice guys finish last. So that’s it -- don’t you punks stand in front of the liquor store downtown asking me to get you a bottle of 99 Candy Canes no more. It ain’t gonna happen.
Not even for No Age when they continue their Nouns (TMT Review) tour across Europe into the fall on the following dates. Yep, not even then, bro.
Enjoy the Pit Er Pat of Pit Er Pat This October!
Chicago's Pit Er Pat will be releasing their latest album entitled High Time October 21 on Thrill Jockey.
Comprised of Fay Davis-Jeffers (vocals, piano, guitar), Butchy Fuego (drums, vocals, percussion, electronics/programming), and Rob Doran (bass, vocals, guitar, electronics). Pit Er Pat also employ a variety of other instruments on the record, including electric kalimba, Burmese temple gongs, bongos, shakers, bells, chimes, claps, melodica, and a bunch of other clangy hippie shit. High Time was recorded by drummer Butchy Fuego, who has also recorded Soft Circle and Matteah Baim, in their own Top Cat Studio. And if that wasn't enough, the record also includes horn arrangements by Dylan Ryan (Icy Demons, Bronze, Herculanium) and flutes.
The band is planning a monster tour in the fall to support.
Tracklisting for High Time:
Death Cab for Cutie Add U.S. Tour, Look Even More Indie Than When They Were Actually on an Indie Label
Mango Starr: What's up dude!
Ben Gibbard: Shut up.
Mango Starr: Huh?
Ben Gibbard: I said shut up.
Mango Starr: Why? What's your problem?
Ben Gibbard: Blah blah blah, shut the fuck up.
Mango Starr: Ben... this doesn't sound like you...
Ben Gibbard: I saw what you wrote about me on Tiny Mixed Tapes.
Mango Starr: What did I write?
Ben Gibbard: You know what you wrote.
Mango Starr: Whatever... I didn't write shit.
Ben Gibbard: Oh yeah? What about this:"Death Cab for Cutie are TERRIBLE. I'd rather die than listen to Ben's stupid voice."
Mango Starr: What?? I never fucking wrote that!
Ben Gibbard: Whatever... no more getting beers when I'm in town.
Mango Starr: Oh, boo hoo. I don't give a shit. You're a mean drunk anyway.
Ben Gibbard: You just don't like us anymore because we're on a major. That's childish and stupid. Our music is as good as ever.
Mango Starr: Yeah, I mean.. I'll admit that your music is still--
Ben Gibbard: You're just a whiner. Hope you die.
Mango Starr: C'mon Ben. I was just fucking around. You know I'm not like that.
Ben Gibbard: I do, but now all your fans think you hate DCFC.
Mango Starr: Oh, don't get so emo on me.
Ben Gibbard: Fuck you.
Philip Glass Drops Glass Box, Shards Injure Several Nearby College Professors
Alright, dudes-in-bands, listen up. Fucking school’s in session, and our instructor is Philip Glass. Yes, after more than four decades of making us all exclaim “Why didn’t I think of that!?!?” as we listened in awe to things like singers counting beats and singing sol feg syllables, arpeggios repeating for 13+ minutes, and electronic rock organs, flutes, and violins being used simultaneously on one record, minimalist/process music pioneer Philip Glass will finally be able to slap all casual musicians in the face at once with Glass Box, a 10-disc retrospective of his incredibly dynamic and prolific career.
Said guilt-box, which will include excerpts from Glass' largest and best-known works, such as Einstein on the Beach and Satyagraha, as well as selections from his ensemble pieces and highlights from scores to several films (including The Thin Blue Line, The Hours and The Fog Of War), will be released, with typical aplomb, via Nonesuch September 23.
In addition to making all other musicians feel like drains on society by comparison, Glass Box will also include a 191-page(!) booklet with notes from the composer, archival photos, libretti (uh... lyrics), texts, and appreciations from several colleagues and admirers with whom we’ll never even find ourselves in the same sentence. These include: Paul Simon, David Byrne, Chuck Close, and, oh yeah, Nonesuch Records President Bob Hurwitz. Even Billy Corgan doesn’t know all those people!
Oh, and one more thing... The CDs and booklet are ingeniously packaged in a fucking cube -- yeah that’s right -- that will be covered on five sides with classic images of Glass by Chuck Close, Robert Wilson, Francesco Clemente, Robert Mapplethorpe, and Annie Leibovitz. Oh, what’s that? Your band’s demo comes in a slim-line jewel case? Yeah... mine does too.
