Clouds hung heavy over Tchock Mansion. No one had seen Thom Yorke emerge from his bedroom in weeks. ‘Site traffic memos’ had been slipped under his door daily with no response, and the other band members were beginning to worry that the rumors were true: people weren’t touching themselves to pictures of Radiohead anymore. It wasn’t like those halcyon days of the early 00s, when teenage boys begged Santa for an ondes Martenot under the tree, when Ed O’Brien sneezed on someone in the supermarket and they were signed to Capitol the next week. No, the memos these days, piling up on Yorke’s hardwood floor, were looking much more grim (it didn’t help that Stanley Donwood designed them).
Phil Selway winced as he imagined the tongue-lashing they’d all soon receive from Thom. “If no one could be arsed to go get “The Universal Sigh” in person, how are Baldy Drumsticks and the rest of you fossil-fuel-dependent gits going to keep these brats’ attentions for one sodding second? Oh, go on, you planning on donating those tears to UNICEF when you’re done?” Phil tried to silence the voice in his head with drink, but too many years of abuse kept the cruel monologue in motion.
Suddenly, an olde-timey phone rang out on the other side of the door… it couldn’t be… was it? Yes: it was the special “Four Tet advice” hotline, right next to the closet where they keep the rarely used “Bangers + Mash” mini-drum! Minutes passed like hours. Finally, Thom stepped into the hallway where the band was camped out. “A bloody brilliant idea just popped into me nog: 12-inch remixes. Right: we’ll get a bollocks-load of shite from all over and let the proper remixes rise to the top! This is the 22nd century!”
True to his word, the first King of Limbs remix 12-inch in the series is all set to drop July 5 (July 4 in the UK), with remixes of “Little by Little” and “Lotus Flower” by Caribou and Jacques Greene, respectively. Independent record stores will have copies for three or four minutes, and they’ll also be available to mailorder customers from Radiohead themselves.
A. Little by Little (Caribou rmx)
B. Lotus Flower (Jacques Greene rmx)