Sharon Jones Inspires Audience To Move About Rhythmically, Using Patterns of Steps And Gestures
Condoleezza Rice Will Be Performing At Aspen Music Festival
Why is the headline above so simplified? Because no amount of sass on my part could've made it any weirder. No, "Condoleezza Rice" isn't the name of some smart-ass indie band; it's the name of that super sexy smart U.S. Secretary of State that we've all come to know and love. Indeed, the Secretary of State will be attending and playing at the Aspen Music Festival. She'll be giving a talk and playing some tunes at 3 PM August 2 in the Benedict Music Tent.
Condie is a former student at the Aspen Music School and supposedly she's a mean pianist. At age 15, Condie played some Mozart with the Denver Symphony and she's been playin' music ever since. She currently plays with a chamber group in Washington, DC. Seems like something you readers would be interested in knowing about.
Here's her musical background, in full detail:
In the early ’70s, our hott little teenage Rice cake was a student at the school for one summer, while her family was parked in Denver. She fell in love there with another young politician and musician by the name of Sonny Bono. Sonny and Condie fell deeply in love but had to keep it a secret from Sonny's second wife, the famous Cher, who eventually divorced Bono because of Sonny/Condie sex tapes that she found in 1975. After Condie and Sonny's summer of love, the two ended up never seeing each other again, per Sonny's request, and Condie never returned to the music school. The following summer, Condie decided that she didn't want to go to music school, because she wanted to study witchcraft instead. It's said that, while listening to "I Got You Babe," she conjured a spell that would cause Sonny Bono to die on January 5, 1998. Surely such prophetic madness couldn't come true, but it did. Sonny Bono died in a tragic skiing accident on the very day.
Matmos Tour Announcement Marked By This Incredible Cartoon
* Wobbly
# Wobbly and Dublab DJs
$ Wobbly and Jason Corder a.k.a. Offthesky
& Snacks and Leprechaun Catering
Calexico, The Pride of Tucson, AZ, Tours
Tucson, Arizona is home to many things (I should know, I went to school there for four years), including cheap Mexican food, beautiful scenic views, and every Tucson indie kid’s pride and joy, Calexico. Yes, the "alt-country" band that is BFF’s with Iron & Wine hails from good ’ol Southern Arizona (the best part of the state -- fuck you, Phoenix.) Fortunately, for those of you who have never been to Tucson and have yet to experience Calexico, they’re touring! But mostly in Canada and a few random states like Nevada and Rhode Island. Oh well, better than nothing at all.
Bring your own Mexican food:
The Flaming Lips Hit All the Festivals This Summer; Hippies Hit Bongs at All Those Festivals
Do you have a problem? Are you under-employed?? Have you been labeled a ‘drug addict’ by the man??? Well, then you’re sure to have the time of your life when the legendary Flaming Lips hit the stage at a drug-addled hippie-festival near you this summer!
Congratulations, man, it’s never been more coincidentally beneficial for you to be a country-fried drain on society who enjoys listening to spaced-out psychedelia and not working for a few days! Just think, all you have to do is trick your mom into giving you her credit card number, gather yourself a die-hard posse, make sure at least one of those posse members has a tent you can use, score the necessary “supplies,” quit your night job at the marshmallow factory, and BOOM. You’re right there, bubble machines, animal costumes, laser shows, and all!
And, as a bonus, if you’re fucked up enough by the time Wayne Coyne and crew take the stage, you might not even mind when they play a bunch of C+ cuts from 2006’s spotty At War with the Mystics (TMT Review)! Wow!
Yeah, I said it. Hear that, Wayne? Step it up, bro.
The dates bulletin:
In Honor Of Oxford Collapse’s Tour, TMT Presents A Guide To The Word “Oxford”
- Oxford (noun): Oxfordshire, a city in England, famous for its university.
- Oxford Shoe (noun): a style of leather shoe with enclosed lacing.
- Oxford Shirt (noun): a men's shirt with a collar, a full-length opening up the front from the collar to the hem, and full-length sleeves with cuffs.
- Oxford Comma (noun): See “Songs By Overhyped Indie Rock Bands,” page 312.
- Oxford Clay (noun): a Jurassic marine sedimentary rock underlying much of South East England.
- Oxford Collapse (noun): a Brooklyn indie rock band on Sub Pop that has a new double album, BITS, BITZ!, due August 5. Please see the appendix for their tourdates.
Appendix:
