Hey baby, happy holidays. Let’s whip out the eggnog before we leave for my parents. Oh, mm, the tree looks great. I love what you did with the lights in that bush. Okay, but don’t put up all of the noise-making ornaments. Put on that aesthetically green Sting album you like so much.
What? What do you mean your mother’s in town? Why didn’t she say anything before now? We told my parents we’d be there at six. It’s 4:30 and you haven’t started the casserole? What’s wrong with you?Yeah, I guess your mother can come over.
Hi Sharron, sorry about the mess. No, we didn’t have the money for a real tree this year. Rich said he’d cook this year. No, we didn’t make it to church this year. Yes, we saw their Christmas card, they looked very happy.
Yeah, mhm. Rich. Richard. Hello? We have to get going if we’re going to get there on time. What do you mean you’re not “feeling too hot?” You’re joking right? What am I suppose to tell them?
“Oh, Rich? He couldn’t make it. No nothings wrong with us.” Sounds great. I love that conversation. Whatever, Rich. No. I’m fine. It’s fine. I’ll stop by the store on the way. Merry Fucking Christmas.
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