♫♪  Samir & Viktor - “Saxofuckingfon”


Last Thursday I was in Portland for a work conference and, naturally, that night I hung out in the hotel, spending that sweet per diem skrill on a very dank pizza that I consumed all by myself (at least, about 3/4 of it). Whilst shoveling food into my gullet I was transfixed by the opening game of the NFL season, between the Patriots and the Steelers. The defending Super Bowl Champs stomped all over Pittsburgh, showing that Tom Brady is an eerily efficient QB. The rest of Week 1 contained a few surprises (Rex Ryan is coaching a decent team! At least for one week), but a big one, although not really if you’ve paid attention, was the Seattle Seahawks’ overtime loss to the St. Louis Rams. A lot of commentators are already picking apart the problems with this team, but if you look at it, they scored 18 unanswered points in the fourth quarter and took things from an embarrassing near blowout to a tense, down to the wire game. If any loss can be described as “good,” this one certainly was.

For week 2, the Seahawks will be under further scrutiny as they head to Lambeau Field, in a rematch of the past season’s NFC Championship game, where Seattle came back from fifty-five minutes of terrible playing to make it back to the Super Bowl. As a Packers fan by blood and a three year Seattle resident, you can see how this game is going to be an anxiety ridden nightmare for me. If the Packers win, I face the ire of my fellow Seattleites, who will blame me for their team’s 0-2 start. On the other hand, should the Seahawks prevail, the Pack will have been embarrassed in the past four meetings, and I won’t hear the end of it.

Thinking about this game is like listening to this Samir & Viktor track, which is an overwhelming mish mash of sax samples, shitty EDM beats, frat boy party imagery, yet vaguely listenable. I’m going kind of crazy thinking about the potential outcomes of this game, and “Saxofuckingfon” almost perfectly encapsulates where my head is at.

Please, for the love of God, Packers, just do me a solid and win this one.

• Samir & Viktor: http://samir-viktor.se

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CHOCOLATE GRINDER is our audio/visual section, with an emphasis on the lesser heard and lesser known. We aim to dig deep, but we’ll post any song or video we find interesting, big or small.

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