Hair Police Constantly Terrified

[Troubleman Unlimited; 2005]

Rating: 5/5

Styles: noise rock, hardcore
Others: Harry Pussy, The Haters, early Black Dice, Wolf Eyes, Prurient

Herbie Hancock has a pretty bitchin' tune from back in the day called "Vein Melter." Fucking classic, and it lived right up to its name by melting your veins into its smooth sliding funk. But a new vein melting king is in town, and its name is "Constantly Terrified." Both the album and the title track, which is definitely the apex of the album, just fry your fucking senses with deluges of terror tones and an onslaught of untamed musical evil. Mind tripping aesthetic weirdness found on Obedience Cuts flew right out the panty-waisted window so that Hair Police could mangle your preference circuits and your equilibrium.

Adopting a style tangentially approaching that of Michigan elder statesmen Wolf Eyes, it's pure, uncut doom squalls, baby. With more live instrumentation, Constantly Terrfied has more organic blubber and gristle slopped into the mix, turning your stomach as it expands your brainpan and hectors your eardrums. John Olson, of Wolf Eyes/Dead Machines/all around good guy fame, appears on at least one of these tracks, and Mike Connelly, head honch at Hair Police HQ, has taken over for noise dilettante Aaron Dilloway in WE (in some capacity), which tidily explains away and sums up that direction choice. Aesthetic terrorism... postmodern atonality, noise mélange. Carpet bombing your senses, good old fashioned fucked-uppedness, explosive disregard for the listener, David Lynch. Lost you yet? I was hoping so.

I don't really believe this album is as good as the score up above... well, it might be, but I found myself disappointed. However, I love this band, and they fucked me up, over, and sideways with this material at No Fun Fest 2005; so I thought I'd help them out with the "check the score" crowd. I'd actually give these recordings two and a half to three out of five, all told. But I'd also encourage anyone to support these dudes and buy the album. Anyway, this album will own your ass. It puts almost all those other "noise" dudes to shame with its potent-as-fuck approach. You might as well put on your tight jeans and thrift store shirt if you can't hang with this shit, pussy.

1. Rattlers Echo
2. The Haunting
3. My Skull Is My Face
4. Constantly Terrified

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