Scissorfight Jaggernaut

[Tortuga; 2006]

Rating: 1/5

Styles: butt rock, beard rock, dudecore
Others: The Supersuckers, The Midnight Evils

Scissorfight are a venerable hard-rock outfit from New Hampshire that have been barn-burning and dropping phrases like “barn-burning” for several years now, releasing discs titled Balls Deep, American Cloven Hoof Blues, and Guaranteed Kill in their decade or so of existence. They play impenetrable wall-of-guitar rawk with burly-dude vocals laid on the top, and they could probably beat the shit out of every TMT writer and staff member. They’re also really boring.

I’ve never been impressed with standard hard-rock bar bands clinging to credibility by virtue of sheer volume and devotion to blues progressions. AC/DC (and, hell, Megadeth) mastered this shit to the extent that no one else really needs to do it; Scissorfight prove why on the grating Jaggernaut. There are the whimsical touches of harmonica and banjo (acceptable as they are both decidedly ‘dudely’ tools of the trade), but we’ve heard it all before. If it’s not a banjo, it’s a washboard or a fiddle or a mouth harp. In college I was friends with a local punk band, and the regional-favorite Midwest rock circuit they played was overstuffed with outfits just like Scissorfight. Put this on before listening to more inventive bands who’ve mined these fields – Drive Like Jehu, Mclusky, Rye Coalition – and the difference is easy to hear. Throw me a fuckin’ bone, guys.

Most Read