AMA Declares That Carnage from Le Loup’s Upcoming Tour CANNOT BE STOPPED, Requires Nurses to Join for Damage Control

So you thought that Le Loup was a large band composed of nice musicians from DC who play otherworldly music that’s good for driving at night? Think again! According to a recent Associated Press report, the band’s true intentions have been revealed, despite the group’s French-translated trickery. Apparently they are all actually wolves and, in a Gwar-like fashion, will be using their upcoming tour to wreak havoc across the North American continent in hopes of raising the Great Wolf Spirit who will then take over the world. Sounds like an episode of Doctor Who to me.

Anyway, the American Medical Association has declared a state of emergency for music fans everywhere. They have decided that the only solution to this impending disaster is to send medical professionals along with the “band” to save audience members from bleeding out. These nurses have been highly trained to detect the early signs of rabies and, for some reason, lupus. Probably an administrative mix-up in there somewhere.

I guess it’s also possible this means that the band Nurses will be touring with Le Loup on a trip through the U.S. and Canada to promote their respective new albums. Le Loup, after all, is releasing Family on September 22 via Hardly Art, and Nurses already put out Apple's Acre on the Dead Oceans label a couple weeks ago. But no, that would be waaaaaaaay less crazy.

Take some self-defense classes first:
10.09.09 - Baltimore, MD - The Ottobar
10.10.09 - Philadelphia, PA - Kungfu Necktie
10.11.09 - New York, NY - Mercury Lounge
10.13.09 - Cambridge, MA - TT the Bear's
10.14.09 - Montreal, QC - Il Motore
10.15.09 - Toronto, ON - The Drake Hotel
10.16.09 - Chicago, IL - Schubas
10.17.09 - Minneapolis, MN - 7th Street Entry
10.18.09 - Omaha, NE - Slowdown Jr

10.19.09 - Denver, CO - Hi Dive
10.20.09 - Salt Lake City, UT - Kilby Court
10.22.09 - Vancouver, BC - The Biltmore Cabaret
10.23.09 - Seattle, WA - Chop Suey
10.25.09 - Portland, OR - Doug Fir Lounge
10.27.09 - San Francisco, CA - Bottom of the Hill
10.28.09 - Los Angeles, CA - The Echo
10.29.09 - Costa Mesa, CA - Detroit Bar
10.30.09 - San Diego, CA - Casbah
10.31.09 - Tucson, AZ - Plush
11.02.09 - Austin, TX - The Mohawk
11.03.09 - Dallas, TX - Cavern Ale House
11.05.09 - Atlanta, GA - Drunken Unicorn
11.06.09 - Chapel Hill, NC - Local 506
11.07.09 - Washington, DC - Black Cat

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