Clinic Tours; Contrary to Popular Belief, There Is Apparently No Dancing, Drinking, or Screwing for Students at Central St. Martin’s College

Well, wee did bop and bop in mono

Wee did bop and bop down low

Got to get it and get it ohhhh

Got it? Do you get it? Get it down low

Ticky ticky to marmalade

Ticky ticky to marmalade

Oh, I ticky ticky to marmalade

Sit here, uh

Come a-come a-come

Sit here, uh

Come a-come a-come come

Well, western boys and highs and lows

Western boys, their highs are lows

Ticky ticky to marmalade

Ticky ticky to marmalade

Oh, I ticky ticky to marmalade

Sit here, uh

Come a-come a-come

Sit here, uh

Come a-come a-come come

Well, western bloc, bloc commander...

What is this shit? The sounds someone makes while having a seizure? Nope. The ramblings of a schizophrenic? Not even. Give up? It's the sound of me singing along to Clinic's "The Second Line" (Internal Wrangler). Are those the actual lyrics? Well, probably not. But it's such a damn catchy song that I kind of have to sing along, incomprehensible though it is.

I wonder if anyone knows the lyrics to this song. Apparently the internets have no idea: every single "I give you lyrics and then put pop-ups and spyware on your computer" site has a different rendition posted. My favorite has to be the one that interprets the song's first lyrics as "weed and bach." Weed and Bach? For reals? Can I come to that party?

Anyway, apparently people hate weed and Bach, and those people are college students. No really, it's true. Those crazy kids at London's Central St. Martin's College have forced the school to cancel Clinic's on-campus performance, scheduled for December 14, because they're afraid it will interfere with exam preparation. Whoa. And this is an art school -- it's not like it's Carnegie Mellon or something -- an art school whose website features some hipster kids with buckets on their heads, no less. I mean, I tried to think of a nice turn of phrase, but I've got to say it: what weenies. What total effing dweebs. Whatever happened to the likes of that good time gal who Jarvis Cocker once told us "studied sculpture at St. Martin's College"? I guess they don't want to "watch [their] lives slide out of view," so to speak. I guess they don't feel like pretending they "never went to school."

Good thing they're touring North America, where people actually appreciate them and where art school kids actually live up to their slacker stereotypes, next year.

And if I were those Clinic guys, I would totally write a blog entry about being uninvited to St. Martin's, completely centered around a pun involving the title of the band's latest release, Visitations (Domino).

Weed and Bach and Common People and Western Bloc and Cocker Tour:

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Etc.