Evian Christ to sell 500 pairs of underwear with his name on them, because what would Jesus do?

Evian Christ to sell 500 pairs of underwear with his name on them, because what would Jesus do?

Guys! How can it be that no one has had this idea before?? I mean, it clearly worked out super-well for Marty McFly back in good old 1955 in the movies. Seems like a no-brainer!

Well, REGARDLESS of no brains and shit; leave it to our our crisp, clean, and holy bottled water messiah Evian Christ to finally have the wherewithal to “produce” the idea of “500 pairs of Calvin Klein-style boxer shorts to sell as merchandise” with his name printed on the band (where Calvin Klein’s name ordinarily goes). Because, according to our friends at FACT, that’s exactly what he done-did.

Apparently, the idea came to him NOT after eating a pot pizza and watching Back to the Future on Blu-ray, but rather, the same place where all good ideas usually come from: his girlfriend. See, she bought him a couple of pairs “as a joke for my birthday […] and people started asking me how to buy them. And I was like, maybe I should make some — then, when I posted the photo on Twitter, The Guardian wrote an article about it, and it just kind of blew up for some reason. So yeah, it just kind of rolled from there and now I’m set with 500 pairs of boxer shorts in my studio with my name on them.” The results will now be available for your consumption — in packs of three, naturally — at the upcoming Evian Christ’s Trance Party that he’s hosting on Halloween at Corsica Studios in London.

There you go. Simple as that, folks. Well, except for the fact that he actually didn’t mean to order 500 pairs of them, but “communication issues” with the manufacturers, you know, being Chinese… sort of resulted in a hilariously sexy customs snafu. According to a conversation Christ had with The FADER, "Ideally I would have got 100. And then they got held up in customs in the UK, I didn’t realize you had to pay a huge customs charge, I had these boxers just like trapped. I had to declare that there were 500 boxer shorts with ‘Evian Christ’ on them. It’s been a real journey.”

But in the end, isn’t that what LIFE is, my friends? It’s like a wise man probably once said: it’s not about getting to the finish line; it’s really about the novelty undergarments that you accidentally over-order along the way…

• Evian Christ: http://www.evianchrist.com
• Tri Angle: http://tri-anglerecords.com

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