Holy Fuck Fudge On Tour [ed. Let’s At Least Keep The Headline Clean…]

I have no idea how Holy Fuck decided on their band name, but I'm guessing it was the result of sheer frustration. This is how the scenario played out in my head: After hours of debating the name of the band, the collective threw up their arms (in sheer frustration) and agreed that the next two words uttered by anyone would be the name of the band. Everyone sat silently for a few minutes, not wanting to condemn the group to a lifetime of mockery due to a shoddy name. Suddenly, the drummer had to pee. While standing in the bathroom emptying his bladder into the porcelain bowl, he noticed a small circular hole on the wall. Being unfamiliar with the concept of a "glory hole" the unassuming drummer went all Porky's on that hole and decided to take a peek. Bursting from the bathroom in tears the drummer screamed, "HOLY FUCK, I just got an eyeball full of CACK!"

For those a little lost because of the slang vernacular my imagination employed back there, CACK is a common mispronunciation of the word "cock," which refers to the (preferably) long, tube-shaped part of the male genitalia. For the never-been-humped ladies reading, "cock" is the gender opposite of "cunt," a slang term for the mighty clam caught between your legs. "Cunt" is also one of the more offensive sounding words in the English language, especially when you pack it full of hate and vitriol. Use it next time you get into a shout-off with the mistress, there's nothing more satisfying than making someone smaller than you cry... unless they become so enraged that they kill you. That would be bad.

Oh... and just in case anyone is still reading, Holy Fuck are about to go on tour. Check them out. They're really good. Seriously.

Holy Fuck Tour DateZ:

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