The Beatles’ penises nigh unrecognizable after Museum of Liverpool defacement

The Beatles' penises nigh unrecognizable after Museum of Liverpool defacement

If you’re male, ponder the importance of your penis for a moment. If you’re female, imagine you have a penis and consider its importance, as well as the details of its appearance. Few appendages are as treasured and few moments as welcome as when another person takes the time to appreciate your penis through touch. So, oblige me for a second and imagine someone’s hand slowly gliding down your abdomen, towards that venerable shaft and scrotal region. Suddenly… SMASH! SMASH! SMASH! SMASH! Your penis has been flattened like Play-Doh by that ambiguous hand! Oh god!

That actually happened, albeit the penises in question weren’t actual ones, but models created by painter Jonathan Gent for a piece entitled “The Beatles in America.” That’s right — the original work depicted each member of The Beatles’ penises. According to Click Liverpool, “The Beatles in America” was defaced last week by a group of visitors to the Museum of Liverpool, who pressed the soft oil into the canvas, thereby sparking uncertainty as to whether the painting can still impregnate be auctioned and/or displayed.

A spokesperson for the museum explains, “The damage is all the more regrettable because along with other works in the exhibition the painting is due to be auctioned to raise funds for children’s charity Claire House.” How unfortu— wait, what?! A painting of penises meant to raise funds for a children’s charity? Well, I guess they don’t look like penises at first glance — more like smeared cake frosting. I hope nobody misled the children into thinking that they can lick it.

Check out this short film if you, for some reason, want to learn a bit more about the painting. In particular, note how one of the final shots is of paint slowly spilling out of a tube. Something tells me Gent has spilled his paint to more than a few Beatles photos…

L-R (top) Paul, George; L-R (bottom) Ringo, John

• Jonathan Gent:
• Museum of Liverpool:

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